None the Worse ✓

43) 'Martin Is The Gayest Character In The Book' And Other Conclusions...

43) 'Martin Is The Gayest Character In The Book' And Other Conclusions Worthy Of A Scientific Law

Up until a few months ago, there had been a kind of person Benjamin had looked at as though they were aliens. They'd do this thing where they'd talk to strangers without melting on the inside, cracking jokes as though they were a script, and, all of a sudden, they would make new friends. He'd almost come to the conclusion (courtesy of the squad) that those kinds of people ought to have sold their soul to the devil.

A few days ago, he'd asked Thijmen. Thijmen had, very calmly, denied the claim. Benjamin believed him. Thijmen just happened to be that kind of person, and during times like these it showed.

Times like these being dinner.

A few months ago, his parents huddled in a corner and screamed (internally). As of now, they seemed to be finding Thijmen's story about Koningsdag to be way funnier than it should have been. Probably. It could also be that Benjamin leaned at the very far opposite of the spectrum, along those who cried (externally) at the prospect of having to talk to someone.

He used to be there.

Used to.

Dinner with the Emsworths had gone from arguments about Daenerys to awkward silence to Dutch stereotypes to good old storytime. Breakfast, admittedly, wouldn't be that much different were it not for Thijmen's incompatibility with mornings and the fact Benjamin's parents underwent character regression whenever they stayed up late which, based on the incoherent screaming at three in the morning, happened more often than not.

All in all though, Thijmen was a good thing. A very good thing. One of the best things.

"People are just sitting all around town, wearing orange clothing, eating pastries that are impossible to eat, and trying to sell their crap to other people."

"But why?" asked Eleanor.

Thijmen raised his shoulders. "I don't know. It's not like they have anything valuable or interesting to sell, and all that stuff is either going to be thrown away or sold onto another person the next year."

Benjamin II slapped the table. "That's so pointless!"

"Dutch people are weird," Eleanor noted.

"And they drink a lot of beer."

"You should definitely show us around on this... strange national holiday. I'm sure it's quite the party."

Thijmen pulled a face that said he disagreed.

"Yes, you could be our tour guide!"

"Sure, I'll be your tour guide," he relented, smiling behind the back of his hand.

Which was why, for the first time in his life, Benjamin wasn't looking forward to the end of the school year.

One would assume that, after last time's fallout, Thijmen's sessions to the counselor would diminish. But no. If anything, they were at their peak. Benjamin couldn't go with him again, though, of course.

Of course.

"How much did you get in the French final?" asked Martin.

"A hundred," said Pi.

"Ninety-five," said Messiah.

"What test?" asked Heston.

They all turned to look at Benjamin so he'd keep the streak up. He didn't, though. While not sulking, per se, he definitely wasn't doing favors to his mood by picking crumbs off his sandwich and staring at the floor. His friends weren't doing favors, either, by talking about a test he'd bombed despite Thijmen's help. Martin mumbled, "Damn."