Poetry and Art

The Darkness

Blinded by the darkness, I stumble for a hold.
It seems that in your life, maybe you never reached your goal?
The truth brought only pain.
A storm to accompany the rain.

The black swirled, blocking off the light...
But with a touch of your hand, you swept away my eternal night.
Mother felt it, too.
And with her confirmation, the light inside me grew.

But then went Momma Neil.
And my heart returned to steel.
Amazing, how easy a smile is to fake.
Just lift your lips and squint your eyes, and a smile is suddenly easy to make.

The pain. That never leaves.
It stays. It makes you heave.
I beg. I shout into the night. "Please. I just need another sign!"
But dream and reality, never, ever, did align.

Your voice I've all but forgotten.
My memory is going rotten.
I'll see you again...I know.
But your loss has brought me to an all time low.

In stories...those last words to a loved one seem to flow.
Funny...seeing as my last words were literally, "No."
You asked me to come! To run with you!
Mother always said it was good I chose not to.

You were a toss away,
When I saw you fall on that horrid day.
I couldn't go to you. They made me stay.
And then that big truck came and took you and mommy away.

I went to practice. Coach told me to sit out if I needed.
We got food. Our order speeded.
Susan got the news before us.
I guess my Mother kept her hushed.

We went home to lots of people...all sad.
I knew the minute I saw, that I had lost my dad.
Mother took me by the hand, trying to be strong.
"Daddy's gone to heaven." She said. "He gone to live with God."

I cried so hard that night.
That's when the darkness won the fight.
I fought for years to break from its suggestions.
No one ever asked me any questions.

After time I learned to cope.
But ever since I've had very little hope.
I've learned to look, sound, and act happy...
I can even fake being yappie.

I couldn't hurt the ones I love.
But the darkness has a very strong shove.
I think my grandpa's figuring it out.
But maybe that's good. Maybe it'll help me sprout.

My friends, they've helped me carry this heavy load.
They've brightened the light that shines at the end of the road.
Without them I know I wouldn't be here.
I wouldn't be here...trying to sound like Shakespeare.

I love them. They saved me.
They helped my learn to fly with the butterflies and the bees.
Now more of my smiles are real.
They've taught me once more to feel.

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So...this was a bit sadder than I meant for it to be. I've been working on it all day...what do you think? 😰