Part Three of Losing Sammy

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I stepped of my dad's car to see my new "step mom". She was all smiley and frankly annoying. I didn't pay attention to what her name was, or I didn't care to know. Either way. Boulevard of Broken Dreams by Green Day was blaring through my ear buds, giving me a slight head ache. I don't turn it down, hearing the guitar riffs was soothing to my aching heart. I take one ear bud out to hear where they say my "new room" is. When he said that, my stomach lurched. I could feel my heart starting to grow colder toward them, and everyone. The room looked plain, and made me miss my old room even more. The bed was hard, and it was shockingly cold in "my new room". I sighed, pulling Carter's hoodie tighter around me. Well, I was bored with just sitting there. So, I decided to explore outside. I snuck past the step-mom cooking something that smelled delicious for dinner, and dad no where to be found. She was humming a song I couldn't name,even though I knew it. I opened the door to see what's outside. Maybe it won't be so bad here, but not seeing Carter is driving me crazy. They had a nice back yard I suppose. But, a yappy little lap dog that kept barking and running around like a chicken with it's head cut off. I wandered to the forest behind their house which had really tall trees. I couldn't resist climbing up one. By the time I found a decent spot to sit, the stars had came out. I missed watching the stars and talking to Carter on my trampoline. We'd talk about anything, and everything. He showed me his tattoos that he had on his arms and shoulder, saying that if his parents ever found out he had them, they would be so mad they would probably kick him out. Which I doubted. His parents love him. It was of a cross on his back located on his left shoulder blade. The detail of it made me wonder how bad that one hurt. Carter also showed me the one on his right upper arm. It was of a tree he planned to "branch out" (no pun intended) all down his arm with branches of names of his family. At first it was just his mom and dad's name on two of the branches. Before we left Panama City, he paid a tattoo artist to add his and my name on there as well. He was an only child, so his parents thought he was wonderful and could never do any wrong. He was indeed wonderful, but it did make me wonder what his parents would say. I closed my eyes and sighed. Getting away from dad and the step-mom made me feel better. Looking at the green foliage made me not want to come down. The crickets were chirping loudly, and the stars had never looked more beautiful. I popped my sketchy ear buds in, and turned some music on. I imagined Carter sitting with me. Thinking of him made my chest hurt. I can't stay here. My eyes started burning. I haven't let myself cry since I left, which was a few weeks ago. He texted me some, but it hurt too much to say a lot. I'm like a zombie, walking around absentmindedly. The pain of not seeing Carter hurts so much, that I felt numb. Three years ago, I cut my leg on some metal and had to have 36 stitches. It wasn't painful, at first. The doctor said that I severed my nerve, so I didn't and still somewhat can't feel where it left a good sized scar. But if it wouldn't had severed my nerve where I was cut, that the pain would be unimaginable. That's how I feel now. I felt the pain that was unimaginable, but then the numbness came.

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