"Heartbroken and Lonely"

"Remastered"

Masterfully massochistic,

Eternally sadistic.

My heart is full and mystic,

But my mind is slow and cryptic.

Holy and eliptic,

This soul is being gifted.

Cloying and smoking,

This ephemeral soaking,

Glowing and joking,

Red burning and choking,

My innards are smoking.

I'm blind in a bind,

Death certificate is signed.

Post apocalyptic mind,

Hold myself in a line.

I am sure that I am fine,

But I'm lost inside a mine.

Secret passages and doors,

Traps hidden in the floors.

Monsters in threes and fours,

Murders bidden in a roar.

Cold anger burning shores,

Leaves my mind with scars and sores.

Passed along with all the rest,

Holding out for a final test,

Will my stars align the best?

Will my heart burn in my chest?

An ending to this lifelong quest?

Or just another angry pest?

I will see at your behest.

Until I see behind the stage,

I will battle this filling rage,

See what's on the other page,

What's read upon my spiritual gauge.

Problematic probability,

Automatic pluasability,

I need to learn humility,

And quit practicing futility,

To the best of my ability.

Holding on or letting go,

Guess I will never know,

What will I have to show,

Will understanding ever grow?

And where will we ever go?

Can't see,

Can't flee,

Won't agree,

Haggard and free,

My last decree,

Remember me...