Mario's marriage

Chap. 2

"Really, Mario?" Cappy started. "A telephone booth?"

"Yes, Cappy," Mario replied. "I have to make some phone calls."

Mario then pulled out a huge bag of quarters that he got from his plumbing job and bikini raiding. (The bikini raiding is not proven. It was a rumor started by Bowser Jr., whom Mario loved very much.) Mario entered the booth, put in a quarter, and made his first call to Peach.

When her sweet voice answered, Mario whimpered, "Is it true? Is it true that you're marrying..."

"Yes, Mario," she answered. "I'm sorry. I know you liked me, but—"

"HOW COULD YOU?!" Mario yelled. "HOW COULD YOU MARRY MY BOWSIE?! HE SAID HE WOULD MARRY ME!"

Peach, who was very confused, asked Mario if he was feeling okay. This made Mario mad. He told her bye and hung up before he used every bad word known to man.

He then cooled down before putting in another quarter and calling Luigi.

When Luigi's timid voice answered, Mario said, "Luigi?"

"Hello?" Luigi said back.

"Luigi," Mario started, "how would you like to earn a few pounds of—"

"Who is this?" Luigi interrupted.

"It's Mario, your brother!" Mario answered, annoyed that his own brother didn't recognize his voice. "How would you like to earn a few pounds of quarters?"

"QUARTERS?!" Luigi said excitedly. "What do you want me to do?"

"I need you to to send a message to Bowser for me," Mario said hopefully.

"Uh, what would that be?" Luigi asked sketchily.

"That he cannot marry Peach," Mario said. "That he promised to marry me."

There was silence for a moment, then Luigi said, "Look, Mario, I can't. You see, I'm the ring bearer. I'm sorry, Mario. I really am."

"I see," Mario said, trying not to sound sad. "Well, bye then."

He then hung up and called Daisy.

When her fair voice said, "Hello?", Mario asked, "Daisy, that you?"

"Of course," she replied. "What do you need?"

"I need to know if you're involved in the wedding," Mario said.

"Mario, I'm sorry to say that I am," Daisy answered. "I am the maid of honor, and in case you're wondering, Luigi is the best man."

Mario thought for a moment, then said, "Luigi told me that he was the ring bearer."

"Well, he lied," Daisy replied. "He probably lied to not hurt you as much. I'm sorry. I wish it didn't have to be this way."

Mario felt his whole world go dark and cold.

"Mario," Daisy said, concerned. "Are you okay?"

Mario hung up, rolled into a ball, and had himself a good cry that lasted about fifteen minutes. When he finally got himself together, he got up and took deep breaths. He had about five more calls to make, and he definitely had the quarters.

He made a call to Bowser Jr., who, yes, had a phone (well, in here, he does. I don't know if he does have a phone in the game, but this is a fanfic, so yeah).

When Bowser Jr.'s gruff voice answered, Mario said, "Jr.?"

"Mario," Bowser Jr. replied. "What do you want?"

"Jr., I need you to do something for me," Mario said.

"What would that be?" Bowser Jr. asked.

"I need you to tell your dad that this marriage makes you unhappy."

There was silence for a moment, then Bowser Jr. spoke up. "Look, even if my dad would listen to me, which he doesn't, and even if this marriage makes me unhappy, which it actually does, I can't help you."

"Why?" Mario asked. "And I thought you wanted Peach as a mother."

"Well no, I don't want her as a mother," Bowser Jr. replied. "Firstly, he would pretty much abandon me, and secondly, I only pretend to like her so my dad will be happy. Also, I'm gonna be the flower 'girl' or whatever. I'm sorry, for me as much as you."

Mario's hope diminished a little. He told Bowser Jr. that he loved him before hanging up.

He put in another quarter and called Rosalina. When her pretty voice answered, Mario immediately asked if she was involved in the wedding.

"Indeed," she answered. "I'm the composer for the band."

"Oh?" Mario exclaimed. "Who all's in it?"

"Kirby and his friends, Donkey Kong and his friends, and that's about it," Rosalina answered. "Lumas is helping as well, in case you were curious."

He wasn't, but he couldn't just say it to her.

"Well, bye then," Mario said before hanging up.

Well, make that one more call to make, he thought to himself before calling Zelda.

When she answered and said, "Hello?", Mario asked, "Are you involved in the wedding?"

"Uh, no," she answered. "They invited me, but I said no."

"Well, can you help me sabotage it?" Mario asked, more hopeful than ever.

"Well," Zelda started, "even if I wanted to, which I might've, I can't help you. I'm helping Link recover. Sorry."

Mario said bye back, and hung up.

He had no one else to turn to (that he could think of). He got on the floor and cried for about two hours before some man pounded on the glass door, yelling for him to get out.

Cappy thought of something. He opened the door and got on the man's head, and Mario instantly gained control.

"Where are we going, Cappy?" Mario asked as he decided to give control to Cappy.

"Trust me," Cappy told Mario. "You'll see."