Chapter One

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My name is Alexandria Woodley, and I am absolutely pathetic. I lean my head back, resting it on the white tile of my bathtub as I take another swig out of the bottle of Bacardi I'm holding. I'm not taking a bath; in fact, I'm fully clothed and slightly tipsy. I have decided to celebrate a lonely Saturday night in my apartment by getting drunk in a bathtub, the most private and dismal of all places I could be drinking. Like I said, pathetic.

Most college girls my age are out at parties the weekend before Thanksgiving, trying to intake their body weight in alcohol before going home to their pure, wholesome families to celebrate how thankful they are for football, financial aid, and the American dream. I, on the other hand, am having a mental breakdown. I usually party every weekend at Cassidy's house. My best friend and I will drink until the sun comes up and then spend Sundays in a hungover daze of camaraderie, peacefully nursing our hangovers with Grey's Anatomy on mute, bacon, and microwave waffles. This weekend, I have chosen to forego my usual party animal self by drinking alone. Mental breakdowns can be exhausting.

My issue stems from the men in my life, or in this case, the lack thereof. Don't get me wrong, I'm definitely not looking for a relationship right now. After breaking up with my last boyfriend 11 months ago, I'm embracing the single life. There is nobody to tell me what I can and cannot do; nobody to argue with when I don't text back right away. I love being single, except when I don't. Tonight, I don't. My last relationship really screwed me over, it seems. I spent my entire freshman year in fight or flight mode - an entire year of overlooking red flags, wondering if I was good enough, and succumbing to emotional abuse. Breaking up was the most freeing thing I've ever done, despite the horrible aftermath of a clingy, crazy boy who doesn't like being told 'no.'

Ping.

The incoming text message pulls me out of my reverie, and I look down at my phone that is lying on the edge of the tub.

Get your ass over here, bitch. This party is so lame without you! -C

I take my time replying.

I don't think so. Not in the party mood. -A

Another text comes back quickly:

I'm not taking no for an answer. You know you wanna come. Just get here. I found a hottie for you! -C

I sigh, then hoist myself out of the tub. As much fun as it is to wallow in self-pity, Cassidy is more persuasive. Deep down, I know I would actually rather be distracted than be alone.

Thirty minutes later, I study myself in my full-length mirror. Black leggings and a slouchy knit sweater with knee-high brown leather boots comprise my outfit. I quickly throw my curled brown hair into a messy bun and add some nude lipstick. I check my phone as I receive another ping, letting me know my Uber is here. I take one last look at the mirror, then leave my apartment for the night. What's the classic line? That's right - this is as good as it's gonna get.

Ten minutes later, we pull up in front of a little two-bedroom house. I thank the driver, then walk up to the front porch and approach the door. Before I can reach for the knob, the door flies open. A flushed, tiny Asian girl stands in the doorway, somehow filling the entire frame with her small body. A drunken grin fills her face, and I laugh. "Already started without me, huh Cassidy?"

My best friend grabs my arm and pulls me into the house, slamming the door behind us. "Alexandria..." she slurs out my full name. "Look. I bought your favorite! This better pull you out of this piss-poor mood you're in." She hands me a bottle of sweet Korbel champagne. I ditch the cap and take a long drink of the bubbly wine.

"Cass, you know me too well," I grin, secretly thankful to be around people again. Cassidy is my best friend, but not just because we've been hanging out since high school. She knows me well. I'm always slightly jealous of how beautiful she is with that long, shiny hair waterfalling down her back and such a flawless complexion. Her typical winged eyeliner and dark red lipstick compliment her skin. The best part about her? Cass is bold. She's not afraid to speak her mind. She balances me out - I'm quiet and anxious, whereas she loves socializing and taking risks. I wish I was more like her.

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