Am I Daydreaming?

Sleep deprivation is my best friend.

Why is it my best friend?

Because it insults me and can get away with it.

I have another best friend, a childhood friend, called anxiety.

Oh, and motivation, but I don't see her often.

You know, I wish motivation would stay around more.

She seems fun. I guess.

Although, having her around all the time isn't that different from having her gone.

When you have her around all the time, it's overwhelming. You get shit done, sure, but it makes you want more than that.

That want to do more with your life gets you obsessed with it.

Then, she leaves. You are alone with greed and anxiety as your only 'support'.

Then, they invite depression into your home of a mind.

Congratulations, your mind is now a broken home.

Full of repeating fights about 'what's better for you' and 'what you should do' and 'what you should've done'.

And bullshit contradicting every one of those.

It leads you to think.

"What's the point anymore?"

"Why do they do this to me?"

"Why are they always fighting?"

"I want this all to end."

You try to convince yourself that it's for your own good, right? They are doing it all for you, right?

You do everything they say, in every situation. You depend on them.

Then you realize it's fucking bullshit.

'They' is a metaphor for the things you think you have no control over.

But you do.

You do have control.

You can get control.

But procrastination and the satisfaction of getting what you deserve (whether it be good or bad), are bitches.

Guess you have to ask for help.

To gain back the fucking control panel.