This part was written in friendly and very funny cooperation with my friend Vanessa :D (To find here under the beautiful name LyrasLullaby https://www.wattpad.com/user/LyrasLullaby )
Group: VIPs
_______________________
Members: Valkyrie, Ghastly, Erskine
_______________________
Valkyrie: Ghastly, did you notice how short my clothes are?
Valkyrie: Hello? Ghastly?
Valkyrie: Hey, this is urgent. We're on the way to a suspect and I don't have fitting protective clothing!
Valkyrie: ... Ghastly? Do you want me to get injured?!
Valkyrie: If you don't answer soon I'll say it's your fault if something happens to me!
Valkyrie: Do you answer now?
Valkyrie: ...
Valkyrie: ... ... Ok, I'll tell Skulduggery.
---
Ghastly: Did you know that it is extremely weird if a vibrator goes off in your pocket while you're in a meeting?
Valkyrie: Your fault if you don't answer in time. >___>
Ghastly: You sent a message every second! And sometimes it's work before phone.
Valkyrie: Work? You're a tailor, you should be sitting in your shop.
Ghastly: I am an Elder, I sit in my office or conference rooms.
Valkyrie: What ever. Do you have time? I need a new coat and my trousers are too short!
Ghastly: I'm a busy man since Erskine talked me into this. Of course I don't want you to get injured on a mission but it's not on me all alone - I don't have time by the way.
Valkyrie: Then make time, it's important.
Ghastly: The cooperation of the sanctuaries is important as well.
Valkyrie: ... COME ON. I just want a fitting coat! It's cold outside and I don't have a warm jacket!
Ghastly: Then it's about time to buy one. It's going to be cold for a while now.
Valkyrie: ... What would the Grandmage say if you carelessly put a 16 year old in danger?
Valkyrie: ...
Ghastly: Are you threatening me?
Valkyrie: Indirectly...
Erskine: What the Grandmage would say? There are more important things in life than clothes and I send people on dangerous missions on a daily basis. Now pull yourselves together! And talk about that IN PRIVATE next time. It's enough if one phone turns into a vibrator, I don't need to embarrass myself as well.
Valkyrie: You're so irresponsible.
Erskine: Tell that to Skulduggery, he took you in when you were twelve.
Ghastly: Touché.
>>Valkyrie added Skulduggery to the group.<<
Valkyrie: Tell them!
Skulduggery: What?
Valkyrie: They're irresponsible!
Skulduggery: Oh, I'm not the right one for that.
Valkyrie: You turn against me as well now?!
Skulduggery: No. But we have to go soon. Hurry up, ok?
Valkyrie: You're impossible. All of you.
>>Valkyrie left the group<<
Skulduggery: What was that?
Erskine: It was about clothes.
Ghastly: So to say. And about the responsibility of the safety of a 16 year old.
Erskine: But this is your job, Skulduggery. You look after her, not us.
Skulduggery: Oh, while we talk about clothing... How's my new suit?
>>Ghastly removed Skulduggery from the group<<
Ghastly: They got work to do.
Erskine: We as well, now put your phone aside. It looks stupid how you glare under the table the whole time.
![](https://img.wattpad.com/cover/158651965-288-k248457.jpg)
YOU ARE READING
Incorrect SP Text Messages (ENG)
HumorThis is the translation of my last "story", featuring some of the most hilarious text messages of the Skulduggery Pleasant characters :D Enjoy! (I translated it myself so please don't look at mistakes ;D)