In the throes

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Tears that know not how to fall,
My heart can't help but feel it all.
The truth a formless fog that shifts
Guarding pain that never lifts

I search the void and search within
I fight for answers but cannot win
Digging up the past to see
What it is that's killing me

I know the root but not the cause
Seeing the beast but not it's claws
Begging for some slight relief
Something to help me rid my grief

Wishing I could just forget
But this cements all but set
Trying hard to just break free
Running from what's inside me

Sinking deeper in despair
Flashes of that Auburn hair
Lying in the throes of death
On the edge I hold my breath

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