Forty one

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"Can I go to Maggie?" Mary asked Michonne quietly as they stood around the fire, waiting for the others to join the meeting.
"Yeah. She's just there, go on." Michonne nodded, and Mary wriggled down from Michonne's hold and walked over to Maggie.
"Hey, honey. Are you okay? Where's your daddy?"
"I'm okay. Daddy's at the house, but he's coming. Can I sit with you?"
"Of course." Maggie smiled softly, lifting Mary up onto her lap. "What did you do to your hand?" She asked suddenly, seeing the bandage.
"I burned it. It was an accident." Mary explained quietly, resting her head on Maggie's shoulder. "Where's Glenn? And Uncle Daryl?"
"Glenn has... He's just gone out, but he'll be back soon," Maggie nodded, as if trying to convince herself, "and Uncle Daryl will be back from his run soon too. Don't worry."
"I miss everyone," Mary sighed, "we don't spend as much time together. It's sad."
"I know. You're missing Uncle Daryl aren't you?"
"Yeah. He never sees us anymore. He's always busy." Mary sulked, twisting Maggie's hair around her good hand.
"I know. But he's just trying to fit in. It'll all be normal soon."
"We're going to start." Deanna announced suddenly.
"Can we wait? There's still people coming. Glenn, Rick." Maggie asked.
"We're going to start,"
"No," Mary cut off, "we gotta wait for daddy!"
"Mary. You'll have to go home." Maggie warned, and Mary sank into her chest.
"We're going to start. It's already dark. We're going to talk about what happened. Not the fight. Not what precipitated it. We're dealing with that. We're going to talk about one of our constables, Rick Grimes. We're going to talk about how he had a pistol he stole from the armoury, about how he pointed it at people. And we're going to talk about what he said. I was hoping he'd be here..."
"She said he's coming." Michonne snapped slightly.
"I'm sure he'll be here. And I'm sure we can work this all out." Carol smiled softly.
"We've waited long enough. Okay. For Rick to stay, who would like to talk first?"
"I will," Michonne spoke up with her eyebrows raised, slightly teasingly, "the other constable. You... You don't understand what it is like. What it's like out there. The things we have done to survive. The things Rick has done so his children can survive. He fought so hard. He'd go days without food, just so Carl and Mary could have a little more. Only drink the minimum about of water possible, so Judith had plenty of formula. He'd fight so hard to survive, while single handedly raising a one, five, and fourteen year old. And five year olds aren't easy."
Some people chuckled at that, and Mary smiled softly, holding her bunny a little tighter.
"We were out there for so long, yet every night he'd sleep with his children beside him, and be woken up by Mary's nightmares. He didn't care that he was fighting Walkers and keeping us alive on two hours sleep and minimal sleep, because Mary was okay. Out there, it's so different. So different. You have to fight. He had to watch his kids fight. He saw his kids go through... Through horrific things..." Michonne whispered, her voice trailing away, tears crawling into her eyes.

Carl, shot through the stomach.
Mary, lost in the woods.
Judith, born from her mother's death.
Carl, putting a bullet through his mother's skull, never the same, forever broken.
Mary, losing her mother, becoming lost.
Judith, never even meeting her mother.
Carl, unable to adapt, unable to be a child.
Mary, getting a sickness, one that Rick couldn't even touch her without getting himself.
Judith, becoming separated from her father, her brother, her sister.
Carl, having to fight for his home, for his sisters's home.
Mary, shot, presumed dead.
Judith, being suffocated by the child caring for her.
Carl, loosing both of his sisters, loosing everyone except from his father.
Mary and Carl, almost being raped, the pair pinned down brutally.
Judith, being held hostage by a cannibal.
Carl, having to protect his sisters from being eaten.
Mary, her infection life threatening, seizing on the church floor.
Judith, her babysitter dying on the roadside.
Carl, finding out that his friend was dead.
Mary, limp, practically dead.

Michonne breathed shakily, and spoke up again, her thoughts and tears erased. "And after being out there, and then not being how you were out there... It can drive you crazy. Rick just wants his family to live. His son, his little girl, his baby. He wants all of you to live. Who he is is who you're gonna be. If you're lucky."
"Alright," Deanna nodded slowly, "who's next?"
"Rick Grimes saved my life over and over. There's terrifying people out there, and he rescued me from them. People like me, people like us, need people like him. I know what happened last night was scary. And I'm sure he's sorry for that. But maybe we should listen to what he was saying." Carol said shakily, all at once, but Mary barely listened, watching Michonne hold back tears.
"I think Mishy needs a hug." Mary whispered to Maggie before leaving, going into Michonne's arms. Michonne held her tightly, pressing her face into the top of Mary's head, inhaling the child's scent of strawberry shampoo, peanut butter, scrambled eggs, and coffee.
"Love you." Mary mumbled into Michonne's chest.
"Love you too." Michonne whispered, kissing her head.
"Abraham?" Deanna asked, making Mary look up at her quickly.
"Me?"
"Yes. Yes, I want to hear from you."
"Well, simply put, there is a vast ocean of shit that you people don't know shit about. Rick knows every fine grain of said shit, and then some."
"I want to talk." Mary demanded suddenly, her shyness vanishing, knowing it was more important to talk about her father.
"Mary." Michonne sighed shakily.
"No," Deanna nodded slowly, "let her talk."
"My daddy can't go. He's the bestest daddy ever. And he loves me and Carl and Judy. And if you kick him out, I'll kick your ass. And if you kick him out, then you make me and Carl and Judy go. Because I'm not staying here without my daddy. If you make him go, I'm not staying with Glenny and Maggie like he told me I am. And I'm a cute five year old who uses big words like anxious and dumbass! You can't make me go. I also limp and I burnted my hand today. And what if we don't find any food again? My daddy is a dumbass. That's Glenn code for cool and amazing and badass. Don't make us be eaten by Walkers."
No one spoke for a minute after that. No one could say anything, because they all realised what they were doing when they were trying to kick Rick out. They were turning away three children too.
"Okay. Does anyone else have anything to say?" Reg asked shakily as Deanna looked into the roaring fire.
"I do," Maggie said suddenly, "my father respected Rick Grimes. Rick is a father too. And his children have been through too much. He's a man with a good heart who feels the things he does, the things he has to do, and all of us who were together before this place, no matter when we found each other, we're family now. Rick started that. And you won't stop it. You can't. And you don't want to. This community, you people, that family, you want to be a part of it too."
Deanna stepped forwards slowly. "Before we hear from anyone else, I... I would like to share something in the spirt of transparency. Father Gabriel came to see me the day before yesterday, and he said our new arrivals can't be trusted, that they were dangerous, that they would put themselves before this community. And not one day later, Rick seemed to demonstrate all the things Father Gabriel said. I had hoped Gabriel would be here tonight."
"I don't see him here Deanna. So you're just saying what someone said. Did you tape him?" Jessie snapped.
"He's not here." Maggie pointed out.
"Neither is Rick."
"My daddy is not bad!" Mary hissed.
"Mary, I'll have to take you home if you keep shouting out. Okay?" Michonne sighed, and Mary nodded, hiding her face in Michonne's coat.
"Excuse me." Maggie whispered, walking away.
"Shall I go?" Mary mumbled shakily.
"No. You're with me. You're not leaving my side, okay? Just in case something goes wrong."
"Okay." Mary nodded, closing her eyes.
"Does anyone else have anything to say?" Deanna asked her again.
"I..." A man said unsurely, whom Mary recognised from earlier as Tobin, "I like these people. And he has a little kid. A family. But I, but I have a family, my own family, and I just want to keep my family safe, you know? And I don't even know what that means anymore, but if it means we've got to get rid of..."
Tobin's voice disappeared suddenly, stunned to silence. Mary's eyes opened, and she saw her father, covered in blood, carrying a dead Walker over his shoulder.
"Daddy?" She whispered shakily, a mixture of confusion and panic in her words.
"There wasn't a guard on the gate. It was open." Rick spat, throwing the Walker onto the ground, everyone backing away from it in fear and disgust.
"I asked Gabriel to close it!" Spencer defended to his mother, wild fear on his face.
"Go." Deanna hissed, and Spencer ran to the gate before saying another word.
"I didn't bring it in. It got inside on it's own. They always will, the dead and the living, because we're in here. And the ones out there, they'll hunt us. They'll find us. They'll try to use us. They'll try to kill us. But we'll kill them. We'll survive. I'll show you how! You know, I was thinking, I was thinking how many of you do I have to kill to save your lives. But I'm not gonna do that. You're gonna change! I'm not sorry for what I said last night. I'm sorry for not saying it sooner! You're not ready, but you have to be, right now, you have to be. Luck runs out!" Rick ranted.
But his speech was cut off by Pete wandering into the courtyard, Michonne's katana in his hand, stumbling, drunk. "You're not one of us. You're not one of us!"
"Don't move." Michonne whispered into Mary's ear, holding her even tighter to her chest, getting up.
"Pete, you don't want to do this." Reg soothed, hiding his fear, walking over to Pete, protecting Rick, protecting his group.
"Get the hell away from me, Reg!"
"Pete, just stop."
"Get way from me!"
"Reg. Reg!" Deanna warned. Michonne pushes people behind her, creating a barrier between the community, and Rick, Reg, and Pete.
"Take her." Michonne ordered, kissing the top of Mary's head and passing her over to a random woman, who Mary (thankfully for everyone's sake) recognised as Teddy's mom.
"Just stop, okay, just stop." Reg said gently, going to get the sword out of Pete's hands.
"Get away, get away!" Reg screamed, and Michonne was grateful that Mary was with a mother who refused to let a child watch, because Pete slit Reg's throat. Blood began to pour out of his throat, Reg's arteries split.
Abraham tackled Pete to the floor, as Deanna screamed, howls ripping out of her throat. Michonne ran over, helping Abraham.
"What happened?" Mary panicked, trying to look, but not being allowed, Teddy's mom holding her still through her shaking hands, "Is it Deanna?"
"This is him! This is him!" Pete screamed from the floor, hysterical and drunk.
"Shut up!" Abraham growled.
"It's him, this is him!"
"Rick," Deanna hissed firmly through her sobs, "do it."
Then Mary heard a shot ring through the air, and everyone scream.
"Don't be upset," Mary whispered up the the woman, "he's a bad man."
But before she could reply, Mary tuned to see Aaron and Daryl stood watching, and a man she recognised slightly, but not enough. "Rick?"
For Mary, the next hour was a blur, a blur of new and old, of uncertainty, of familiarity, but by the end of the hour, she was sat on Daryl's lap as he ate dry cereal, happy to have him back, while a new yet old person sat opposite them. She finally realised she did know him; he was Morgan. They met him in Kings County, over a year ago, back when Mary was healthier and without a limp, but when the loss of her mother was raw, when she was younger and more innocent and weaker.
"Want some?" Daryl asked Mary gently, and she nodded. He reached over and tipped some Cheerios into an empty cup, letting Mary eat them with her fingers, the child refusing to use a spoon, Daryl not caring about utensils anyway.
"You should be in bed." Rick said suddenly, as if only just remembering Mary was there.
"Not tired." Mary mumbled groggily, a definite lie; it was just past midnight.
"I'll take you up soon." Rick nodded, going back to look at the map Morgan had brought with him.
"You were right," Morgan said suddenly, "it wasn't over."
"We should talk more tomorrow." Ruck sighed, then he paused. "Listen... I don't take chances anymore."
Morgan nodded slowly, agreeing with him. "And you shouldn't."
Daryl ate the last of his cereal, then got up, passing Mary to Rick. "'M gonna go get some sleep."
"Yeah. See you later." Rick nodded, and the other man left. "Listen, Morgan, I said it just now. I don't take chances anymore. I'd... We'd feel better if you slept in a separate house tonight. A locked house."
Morgan nodded slowly. "Yeah, I understand."
Carl chose that moment to come home, after going for a walk, and nodded at Morgan.
"Hey, Carl, I'm just taking Morgan to the house. Can you take Moo up to bed? She's so tired. Try to get her to go to sleep. And just check on Judith
"Sure." Carl nodded, taking Mary.
"Okay, I'll be back in a minute." Rick said softly to Mary. Mary whined in protest, but didn't say anything, too tired to even argue. She fell asleep in Carl's arms half way up the stairs.

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