Second Chances (5 Chapter sample read only)

Chapter 1 - Biting the Bullet

THIS BOOK IS DUE TO BE REDUCED TO A 5 CHAPTER SAMPLE READ AROUND 12TH AUGUST 2019

I can feel my head thudding with the beat of the music that seems too loud, too lively, just too everything. I look down at my feet, ensconced in shoes that are like the music, too much, too high, too bright, too sparkly and definitely too tight. My friends who insisted that this is just what I need and used lines like: 'Time to get back on the horse' and 'You just need to bite the bullet and do it' are with me, but are either already hooked up with men they've left at home or are clearly on the lookout for new meat and seem to be succeeding in their efforts. I question, for the umpteenth time what I'm doing here.

Maxine, my closest friend is now standing next to me and smiling. "How you doing?" she asks making me laugh.

"This is torture, Max. These places are more like cattle markets than I remember first time around."

"You have been getting some seriously admiring glances, but I think your demeanour is putting them off. You look angry and scary."

"Maybe I am angry and scary."

"Come on. Trip to the ladies, a couple of cocktails to loosen you up and then we dance."

"Dance? I can barely walk in these shoes."

"Then you need more practice. I will not take no for an answer," she tells me taking my hand to drag me off to the toilets that are quite plush and fortunately quiet.

Talking across neighbouring cubicles Maxine begins speaking again and confuses me until I realise she is now on the phone and talking to her husband, Regan.

"No, we haven't got any chocolate," she tells him and then laughs a rude, intimate laugh. A private moment that makes me sad, sad for myself because I no longer have anyone to have a private, intimate moments with, haven't had for a long time, even before Miller and I separated. "Yeah well you just remember that babe and so long as you're getting up with the kids in the morning I shall be happy to oblige." She giggles now.

I flush the toilet, readjust my clothing and exit the cubicle to wash my hands. I am still standing at the sink when my friend joins me, flushed and smiling.

"I don't want to know, don't tell me! I can't look at Regan if I have details of you and him." I laugh. "And he is my boss, so, hell no," I say making us both laugh.

Maxine stands behind me and pulls my loose hair back into the nape of my neck.

"You're still the most beautiful girl I know," she says making me smile as I recall all the times she's said this to me and I truly believe she believes it. "You are, look at you," she implores, spinning me to check out my appearance in the full length mirror.

I am twenty nine years old and probably look a couple of years younger, I'm five feet four, petite, but have hips, a bottom and an ample chest, no boy like shape for me. I have curves and edges and I know that I am considered attractive with hazel eyes, gold, green and brown in equal measures that seem to highlight my freckled complexion, just a few, a splattering my mother calls it. Maxine is still holding my hair back, like a pigtail in her hand, my unspectacular hair, mid brown, nothing out of the ordinary, although the few grey hairs that have appeared recently are being masked by the lowlights I have in, copper, dark blonde and light brown streaks hiding the signs of ageing and stress.

"Beautiful." Maxine releases my hair as she traces her fingers down my face, her touch totally non-sexual. She skims across my naturally high cheek bones, down to my neck and shoulders that are barely covered by the overpriced dress I've invested in for tonight. Then she runs her hands down the sides of my body, over my hips and then with a smirk gestures along the length of my legs to my shoes, with what she calls 'fuck me' heels.