✔️| 𝐈𝐕𝐄 𝐂𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐎𝐒 | 𝘀𝗲𝗾𝘂𝗮𝗹 𝘁𝗼 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝗼𝗿 𝗹𝘂𝘀𝘁

Chapter 86

X A V I E R  J O N E S

after chemo, i wasn't as tired as usual, so i decided to attempt to make dinner. i found a cookbook probably from my mom and flipped open to something easy, hamburgers, potatoes, and asparagus. it couldn't be that hard, right? it was just cooking and flipping some things. simple. i took some meat of some sort that was needed and started reading the instructions. i got out a pan and put it on the stove, turning the stove on low. i made two circles and flattened them out for the burgers. i got out the spices and put the burger on the pan. when i came back to the island, i realized i didn't put any spices on, but figured it would be okay. i sliced up some potatoes and put them in water on the stove, with spices this time. i realized asparagus took too much time to cook, so i put them back. i looked back at the cookbook, fifteen minutes to cook. i went into the bedroom and scrolled through social media. i had somehow completely forgot about the food, so when i heard the fire alarm go off, i quickly rushed into the kitchen. the pan had an excessive amount of smoke coming from it and the alarm wouldn't stop ringing. i tried to blow the smoke away, but there was too much. i got two paper plates and attempted to get the smoke away with them as the front door opened. audrey came in and quickly pushed cecilia's stroller to the side, so she could rush over to me. she grabbed the pan and put it under the sink, turned off the potatoes, and cecilia started crying. she picked her up and rocked her, looking at me annoyed as we waited for the alarm to dial down.
"i told you not to cook unless i was home." she said, swaying back and forth slightly trying to calm cecilia down.
"i know. i was just trying to do something nice, i guess." i replied.
"and i appreciate the gesture, but please wait until i get home next time." she told me. "now, if you want we can talk about earlier."
"were you seriously not with nico? i have to know." i asked.
"i was not with nico." she responded. "give me one second, i'm just going to put cecilia to bed."
i nodded and she left the room. i started feeling guilty that she wasn't with a guy while i was out with ashlyn trying to make things "even". she came back in the kitchen and stood in front of me as i stood against the kitchen.
"i was with his girlfriend." i said.
"i know." she replied. "she messaged me."
"oh." was all i could say.
she looked down and i pushed my hands in my pockets as we both stood there awkwardly.
"i have to ask, did you hang out with ashlyn because you wanted us to be even?" she asked, looking up.
"yeah, i thought you know, if i hung out with a girl it was fair, i guess." i responded.
"did it work?" she questioned. "did it make you feel better or some messed up shit?"
"no." i replied. "she brought about a good point though. i really should stop being the over protective boyfriend that everyone is annoyed with. i should trust you to leave the house. she said that you probably never leave the house without me because you're scared to hurt my feelings. is that true?"
"kinda. i guess i just feel bad going out with guys. just because i feel like if i was to cheat on you, i would've broken your trust. i dunno, trust is just a thing that means a lot to me and it doesn't necessarily seem like you trust me." she told me.
"i'm sorry, i should've realized i was being like that. but please, audrey, tell me where you went off to that i can't know about." i begged.
she looked down again and looked me back in the eyes.
"i'm really happy, xavier. and if i tell you." she paused. "i think you're going to take it away from me."
"what? take the happiness away from you?" i asked.
"yes, because you aren't going to approve of who i was with." she responded. "i will tell you, but i need to work up the courage to say it."
"am i that hard to talk to?" i questioned.
"xavier, on this one, it really isn't you. it's all on me, i promise." she replied.
i took my glasses off and ran my hand along my face.
"yeah, sure, take your time." i told her. "we're good for now though, right?"
she took a step closer to me and we embraced each other in our arms.
"yeah, we're good." she replied.
"please don't rush to tell me, baby. i want you to be comfortable when you open up to me." i said.
she looked up at me, making me worried that i shouldn't have used the pet name.
"baby?" she chuckled.
"uh, yeah. is it not okay?" i replied.
"no, it's fine. you don't seem like the person to say it, but it works." she said.
she rested her head against my chest again and i kissed the top of her head. where the hell did she go to that i'd be so upset about? i wanted to trust her, but part of me felt like she was doing something behind my back.

. . .

using ashlyn's advice, wonderful.

incase anyone was curious, my doctors appointment went well. it was for my kidneys, if you didn't know, i have iga nephropathy. they went down five percent, but it's nothing drastic, so it's all good. only three blood cells were found, which was really good. so right now, my body is functioning properly for the majority. i doubt anyone cares, but just so you know. :)

upcoming parts are going to be a bit confusing, so ask questions if needed.

my dumbass posted on the conversations what was going to happen because i wasn't thinking. it's gone, but oh my lord.

IM SO FUCKING HAPPY FOR JORDAN AND JINJARA!! I LOVE THEM WITH ALL MY HEART!

i'm starting to write the sequel to this tonight because i want to have a head start. :)

i want to change the name to love or lust and this story, but i feel like it'd be really annoying. argh.

i feel like i'm tuning everyone out and i feel bad.