A Team of Two

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By the time I was finished explaining to Jessica the extent of my PTSD, about the night terrors and the recruitment center arson, it was three in the morning

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By the time I was finished explaining to Jessica the extent of my PTSD, about the night terrors and the recruitment center arson, it was three in the morning. We sat on the sand next to the sculpture of the mermaid, cross-legged and facing each other. The ocean air was thick with the smell of salt water and sadness.

Jessica pushed out a breath. "I didn't know people could sleep-drive," she said.

"Yeah, it happens sometimes when people take certain sleeping pills. I took one last night, hoping to be able to drift off. Now I'm here. It happened to me a few times before the fire in New Orleans. Once I found myself in the backyard of my dad's home, about to walk into the pool. That was scary as shit." I shifted toward the ocean and stretched my legs out straight.

"But how are you certain you set that fire? Let's go over the evidence again."

She was trying to bargain with the facts, just like I had for weeks. It was time to move toward acceptance.

"I don't have to. I'm sure they have my DNA on the T-shirt. I need to do the honorable thing and turn myself in. The paper said an arrest was imminent. Which means they know it's me. I thought I could run away. But I can't do that. Can't have that on my conscience. I'm going back tomorrow. Well...today. I've made up my mind. I've gotta turn myself in."

Without saying a word, she scooted so she was sitting in my lap, straddling me and sinking onto my thighs. She wrapped her legs and arms around me and held tight. "I love you. I'm going with you."

"What? Jess, no."

"Yep. I am. I've seen what happens when you abandon the person you love. It never works out."

I scowled. "I'm sorry for not telling you the truth. I'm sorry for—"

"Stop. It's insignificant now. Let's go back to my place. We're going to try to sleep for a few hours, then we'll put breakfast on for the guests and ask Nicole to take over for as long as possible. I think she'll understand. She'll have to. Then we'll get on the road."

She pulled back and traced my eyebrows with her fingertips, but I couldn't return her gaze.

"Hey," she whispered. "Open your eyes."

I did and reluctantly met her gaze. Even though her eyes were puffy from crying, the moonlight shone on her skin, making her look angelic.

"This isn't your fault. This happened because of the war. Because of what happened to you over there. We need to tell a judge that."

"I'll try," I said, exhaling.

"No. We'll try. We're a team now."

"You don't have to—"

"I want to. Whatever you're going to face up there, I'm going to be with you. I figured something out today."

"What's that?"

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