Decaying Hearts

Chapter 7

   

     We awoke at 3am and carried out our four hour patrol. Thankfully the night was uneventful; nothing more than the Rosie incident earlier that night. After our patrol we both trod back through the grounds, half dragging our tired bodies back towards the building to allow Maria and Robert to take over.
     By the time we managed to reach the class room our eyes were held open only by will power to fight the sleep that lurked beneath heavy eyelids. It would have been easy to let our bodies to fall against the lockers, but we lasted long enough to let our bodies slam into our make shift beds.
     We had two hours to rest until 9am, when we would have to congregate in the cafeteria for the group's weekly meetings. All would be present –bar those on patrol- to discuss the latest updates on life and civilisation, inside and beyond the fences. This would include my new residency in the group no doubt and just how miserably bleak the world looked without completely murdering morale.
    Tony would then enlist a group to go out on the run and the rest would be dismissed to carry out their daily chores, whilst the run was planned and set in to motion. Lenny had explained to me prior to the meeting what a typical run entailed. It was usually a group affair, 3 or 4 people, this excluding Lenny's solo escapade that led to our meeting. He had gone to the nearest town, a 5 minute drive away from here, in search of something he wasn't willing to reveal. Lenny had admitted he was supposed to ride Finch into town that day but had decided against Tony's wishes to take a car- I am just grateful he did disobey and brought the car, otherwise we both would have been flesh caught between teeth.
    The group would be assigned a goal with the permanent strategy of in and out again in the quickest time possible, avoiding all opportunities that would attract the unwanted attention. The only strategy in my opinion. It was always the men that took on the role of heading outside the fence. Rosie was obviously heavily pregnant and was in no state to be in any immediate danger or unpredictable circumstances. If she went in to premature labour on a run it would only result in a disaster, undeniably it would end a life as one entered the world. No baby, no crying, no sound to lure the dead.
    Maria was the group's main doctor and so I could understand why they would be hesitant to risk her life with no justifiable reason. In fact I think it would be incredibly stupid to send her out with limited number of people to protect her and complete the mission given.
    Then there was Nancy, who had suspected dementia but with no real medical service to find out it was just Maria's best guess. She often forgot what had happened to the world. She would sometimes wake in a panic and confused, not understanding why she was sleeping on a hard mattress on a classroom floor rather than her comfy bed in Cheshire. On them days Robert made excuses and spared her the truth of today's reality. T was a kind mercy from her husband to allow her to live unknowing of the world's imminent extinction. So it would be unfair to send her outside the fence.
    But for Emma there was no excuse. A girl so young yet too afraid to leave her brother's side. She cowered behind her brother's muscle and so rendering herself weak. She would be easy pickings to the dead. She needed to man up and embrace the fact that in order to live she needed to know how to fight. She wasn't vulnerable in the same way Nancy or Rosie was, she was just scared.
     Once everybody had arrived the meeting didn't really take long. Tony, Howard and Jake were already in the cafeteria waiting, with Emma obviously stood amongst her brothers shadow.
    In one way I could understand her fear to stray too far from her brother's side. Naturally, brothers are very protective of their siblings, especially sisters. Whether it be protecting them from dirt bag men or from physical dangers, a man would always protect his sister and it was obvious that that was the case between Emma and Jake. Jake had always been there for his sister and that would never change for him, but in a world like this everybody's number was creeping up. One day he might not be there to protect her.
    Beyond that he was a very well built man, with defined muscles beneath the short sleeves of his black tee that hugged his biceps tightly. He was blatantly strong and knew how to defend himself, so why wouldn't anybody want his protection.
    It wasn't long after Lenny and I had arrived that Rosie and bump waddled into the room with Maria immediately behind her. Maria repeatedly offered her support, but Rosie repeatedly refused with a wave of a hand.
    Robert and Nancy wandered in shortly after. Nancy was ever so frail compared to the rest of us. She had long grey hair and her skin fell in wrinkles across her face. It was Lenny who had informed me of her dementia and how it was taking its toll, how she would forget about the world as it was. I guess she was lucky in that sense. But sometimes she would turn aggressive and turn against the group claiming she was being kidnapped and held against her will. She would demand and scream to go home. The only person who could ever calm her down was her husband.
    Robert, however, look just as fit as the youngest of us despite his greying locks and glasses that sat at the end of his nose. His age certainly didn't mean he was less capable of the work than the rest of us. It just seemed he was instantly excluded from the raids due to 'natural selection'. Apparently he wasn't an ideal candidate for the jobs. Bull shit.
    "Everyone's here?" Tony beckoned from his position on one of the tables; demanding everybody's full attention and carrying out a quick head count. All 10 of us present, despite the usual rule to keep the patrols on their shifts. 
    "I'll make this quick, so patrols can get back to the fences." He said. "So, things aren't looking much better on the outside, as you can probably guess. The teeth aren't straying too close to the perimeter to cause any worry, but as I've said before, if you see anything you think may lead the teeth to us then please don't hesitate to pull Howard or I aside. We'll sort anything out to the best of our ability.
    Secondly, as you know, we've had a new addition to our family here and I want all of you to make sure he feels welcome and fits right in." I suddenly felt awkward being introduce like the new boy in school.
    "I've been in touch with the Pollyanna Safe Zone, they still cannot accommodate any of us and so we will expect to be here a good while longer."
    "What's the Pollyanna Safe Zone?" I whispered sceptically to Lenny beside me.
    "It's what it says on't tin, kid. It's safe. Somewhere in Yorkshire."
    I'd never heard of such a place. Though I had been around the Yorkshire area whilst the world went to shit, there was nothing there to me that suggested there was a Safe Zone anywhere. Otherwise I would have never ventured so far down south, I would have searched for this place where a haven was promised.
    "Finally, for this week's run I'd like Lenny and Josh to accompany me. Howard will hold up camp in my absence."
    I coughed nervously. "Wait, Tony could I have a quick word with you before you set anything in to motion."
    Tony scowled but as quick as he showed his distaste, it had gone. I wasn't fully convinced it was actually there, but I'm guessing he wasn't use to being interrupted. He seemed to force a smile as he pulled me to the side of the room. Clearly he was not impressed by any input I was about to give.
    "What can I do for you, Josh?" He smiled, the falseness transparent.
    "Don't you think maybe should include the girls on the raids?" I suggested as politely as possible, so I wouldn't step out of line. Something indicated that was this too late too worry about pushing boundaries.
    "And why would we want to do that?" Tony shrugged.
    "Are any of them even experienced at all, can they protect themselves? What if for some reason we get over run and they can't fight back? Especially Emma, she..."
    "We have fences and patrols. We will not be over run." He said irritably.
    "Metaphorically speaking, what if we are? There is safety in numbers and with the group you've got here, you have to be prepared for anything. With numbers there is also the possibility for more casualties. It only takes one person's weakness to bring the whole group down." I explained, caring very little for Tony's growing hostile attitude, but caring more for everybody's safety.
    It was too risky to only have handful able to fight back if a horde gets past the fences. Too many sets of teeth pushing against it at one time and it would easily collapse.
    "And who do you propose we take with us?"
    "Emma. It's clear she has been hidden from this for too long. She has no confidence, no drive to defend herself because somebody is always there to do it for her. She hides behind her brother's strength. Albeit, Jake and his strength is an asset to this group, but what if he gets hung up trying to protect her and he ends up dead? Your one man down, a man who clearly knows what he's doing." I build my case further, desperate to whip these guys in to shape.
    There is nothing wrong with the way these guys have survived here, but if there is just a possibility that they could grow in to a stronger team that can defend each other as well as themselves, then what is wrong with pushing for that?
     At the mention of Emma's name, Jake's ears seemed to prick up, like a hunting dog listening for its pray, and then his glare turned into almost grief-stricken belief. His mouth fell open to argue as he marched his way in our direction, but Tony's hand had already been raised, demanding him to stop immediately.
      Tony clearly had very little patience to listen to anything Jake might have had on the matter. After already being interrupted by myself, his temper looked to be running thin as he rubbed hard at his forehead and cheeks began to flush red.
     Jake obviously wanted to keep his sister safe. They were reluctantly to let each other go. Too right as well, if my little sister was still with us she would not be leaving my sight for anything, no matter who disagreed. But I would have taught her how to fight, if the worst happened. I completely understood his anguish. I felt guilty for being the one to be causing his distress.
     "Tony, please..." Jake began.
     Emma was one step behind him now with tears streaming down her cheeks. She was terrified and rightly so. She needed to face what was out there, one way or another.
    "Josh is right, Jake. She needs to learn." Tony said simply. "Get ready, Emma. We leave in half an hour." And with that he walked through the canteen and into the hallway, leaving no room for Jake to disagree with the matter further.
    "Trust me, Emma. I don't want to take you out there just for the fun of it. IT's for your own good. You don't know what it's like out there, so how can you be prepared? How can you know how to defend yourself if you need to?" I explained to her, ignoring the death glare radiating from Jake's haunting blue eyes. "You're in good hands Emma. Tony and Lenny are going to be there for you and so will I. I've been out there alone almost since the start, I just want to help you."
     Everybody had turned to face me by now, overhearing our discussion. I could feel there gazes burning through me as though they were demanding answers. The answers to what it was really like out there, rather than Tony sugar coated stories of Safe Zones. Their eyes demanded truth and hope. In all honesty, they couldn't ask for both.
    I shrugged my shoulders and turned to look out the windows to what looked to be a nice day and simply said, "You'll be fine."
   The meeting was adjourned.
  
    After the given half an hour preparation time to gather emergency supplies, weapons and such, we were all ready to hit the road. Everybody apart from Emma. She was hysterical with her arms wrapped tightly around her brother's neck. As I watched them, I was sure I could see each and every skin cell in Jake's cheeks turn scarlet one by one as the time to leave dawned closer.
    Jake wasn't much calmer than Emma. Although he wasn't physically screaming in comparison to his sister, I could see his body shaking and the tears welling in his eyes. He pulled her slightly away from him and stroked her cheeks softly. With any other too people it would have looked romantic, but the affection for his little sister oozed from him like a proud parent. He looked at Emma, taking her in as though it was the first time... or the last.
    I hovered by them silently, waiting for the moment to be over but it didn't seem like it ever would. It broke my heart to see, even more so that they were feeling this pain because of me.
    I gently tapped Emma on the shoulder and asked her if I could have a word. I made it clear to Jake I would only take two minutes of her time before she would be back. I took only a few steps away and Jake watched helplessly from the side lines.
    "Alright, Emma. Pull yourself together." I said abruptly and her delicate frown turned to a dark grimace, a look of hatred. "Look at your brother. All he sees is a weak little girl he has to protect and thinks you can't take care of yourself. Is that how you want it to be? Do you want to put your brother through the constant worry that you can't survive without him? He thinks you can't do it." I continued.
     She looked away, taking a long hard look at her brother and her eyes fell to the floor between us. My words clearly hit home.
     "Look, sweetheart. You're coming home. I promise. But pne day, it may be a different story. One day they might swarm us, catch us by surprise and we might not be able to come home. One day we might need you, your brother might need you. You could end up separated and alone. Would you just throw it all in the air and cry out for your brother? Or would you fight to find your way back to him and to us? I know what I would do and have a pretty damn good idea what you would do too."
     With my final words, Emma smiled. It was only faint and for a brief moment, but in that single, brief moment she finally believe the words I was preaching. There was a delicate thread of self-belief that just needed time to grow, like a spiders web, it starts as a single and turns in to something beautiful.
     I led her back to the spot where her brother anxiously awaited. Her tears had stopped now but the tell-tale signs lingered. The tears were gone, but her eyes remained red and puffy. Her pathetic whimpers had ceased and instead were replaced by calm determination. She had been told she would live and because it had been said, she believed it.
    "On my life, I will keep her save." I held my hand to Jake as my solemn promise. The hand represented my heart-crossed vow to take care of Emma, to bring her back to him. It was a promise that I would not return without her.
     Jake ran his eyes over me as though it was the first time he had ever seen me. He looked at me as if I was a complete stranger, judging me through ice blue eyes. He glared as though he had no other choice but to take the hand and pass on the responsibility of his little sister's safety. Realistically, that's how it was. He grabbed my hand tightly and squeezed painfully.
    "If you don't bring her back, I'll hunt you down." And he disappeared in to the corridors.
    "Alright kids. Let's get crackin' wi' this bitch." Lenny bellowed with a finishing laugh. It was as though he had no care in the world, like he had absolutely nothing to lose when the fact was the ultimate price was our lives.
     But with Lenny, none of that mattered. He always had something to smile about. He was not afraid to carry on living and enjoy the life he had, regardless of the world's cruellest realities. Lenny always had something to smile about. I instantly knew I was going to like this guy.