Decaying Hearts

Chapter 15

   Thankfully the night was uneventful. Lenny and I took the first watch so I could be back early enough to be with Isabelle when she went to sleep; for her first night in a whole new place with a number of strange people, I had figured she would want a familiar face around. I wanted her to feel safe here, to feel safe with me more than anything. Then, if she has at least one person she can rely on, the world might not seem so bad.
   I thought about Isabelle and what would have happened if we hadn’t found her in that closet when we did. The teeth would have been able to smell her and was probably the reason why it had hung around in the house; having all three of us in there must have drove it crazy and drawn the others.
   She would have been all alone, fending for herself. I doubt she would survived more than a week or two on her own, so her parent’s change couldn’t have happened too long before we had arrived; a day or two maybe? I wondered if she had seen it happen.
   She was so young and sweet, she didn’t deserve this life. She deserved the life of tiaras and tea parties, shopping trips and sleepovers. She deserved to go school and do something amazing with her life, maybe she would have been a surgeon or a teacher. She deserved to go to her prom. It was every girls dream to dress up in flowing gowns with glitter and sequins, strutting around in a pair of heels that were far from ideal. Isabelle was going to miss out on so much.
   Just as Rosie had been able to compose herself, Isabelle came skipping merrily into the room as though she hadn’t a care in the world and simply wrapped her tiny arms around Rosie. She had pulled away slightly just to look up and gave her a reassuring smile, and then Belle skipped her way back to where she had been playing.
  We realised the doors of both rooms had been left slightly ajar, and the hollow rooms and corridors carried sound like waves bring the tide. Isabelle had already been through so much more than any child should, I wanted to be able to give her some of her childhood back, but how was the million dollar question?
   Once our watch was over, Lenny and I had both had enough for one day and decided to head straight back to our room. He was still on the quiet side, he wasn’t himself. I presumed he was still wrecked with guilt over something that had been beyond his control, beyond any of our control. It had been Dim’s bullet that had caused the tragedy and it had left the barrel with the intent to kill. I doubted anybody was willing to let it go.
  Isabelle would be waiting with Rosie until I returned. I wasn’t even sure if I’d be able to let her sleep in our room, after all, it was Lenny’s space and I didn’t want to impose. I already felt like an arse being there but he really didn’t seem to mind, so I try to see it as my space too but it will always be Lenny’s.
 “Lenny, you don’t mind if Isabelle stays in our room do you?” I asked politely, breaking our silence. The shift hadn’t been completely silent, there had been some small talk and idle chatter, but there was none of Lenny’s usual humour and just none of his usual upbeat personality.
  “No, get the bitch out.” He turned bluntly.
  I was taken aback all I could do was stare at him, my mouth half open. He looked back at me with solemn grey eyes. After a few seconds the facade collapsed and a smile erupted across his bear framed lips.
  “Course she can. She ain’t gonna take much room, but is she snores or farts in her sleep I ain’t afraid to beat a bitch. I don’t give no shits, girl or boy, I’ll beat that ass.”
  A true laugh escaped my lungs and it felt so good to feel it again.  Air couldn’t come quick enough and my sides were splitting with pain. It had been... I don’t even know long it had been since I had honestly laughed. “Coming from you, Lenny, that’s rich.”
   “What you talking about, boy?”
   “You actually snore like a hippo with a head cold. I swear down on my own sanity that something crawled up your arse and died last night, my nose has never been exposed to such vulgarity.” I managed through the laughter.
  “Kid... you’re talking shit.” Lenny grinned proudly and he began walking back toward the school entrance.
   “You’re a crazy, old fool!” I yelled at him as the distance grew.
   “Less of the ‘old’ Sonny, otherwise you’ll never get the chance to see ‘old!’” He retorted, with a finger over his head.
   I began to jog and quickly catch up with Lenny’s long strides. Stopping in front of him, I rob him of his usual red hat and realised a mess of brown curls to fall, the tips stroking his shoulders. His face was a picture of disgust,
   “If you haven’t noticed, I’ll be waking up next to ‘old’ every morning.” And I toss him back his hat and ran far enough away to miss the swing I knew was coming. As I thought, the fist had missed and tackled nothing but air. I stood around just a metre away, far enough out of reach but close enough to taunt.
  "That’s only if I decide to let you wake up.” He muttered under an angry facade but the laughter slipped through the seams.
   It was comforting to have Lenny around. He was a good guy and easy to get along with. He held on to the small things, like humour, that made us human whilst the others just focused on breathing. Just because we were breathing, doesn’t mean we were alive; not truly anyway. Lenny was a true inspiration to use all and a friend I planned to keep.

   ***
  I picked Isabelle up from Rosie who had taken her to the canteen for dinner. They had welcomed her by splashing out and offering fish finger sandwiches and chips, a rare luxury. Food was scarce and fresh food spoiled quickly so it wasn’t surprising that the group focused on using fresh foods first. It was usually soups that were served in the canteen made out of the produce from the garden. Only at special occasions such as birthdays did they dive into their supply of frozen goods.
  Isabelle was beaming with happiness when the plate of fish fingers and chips, a rare luxury. To top the evening meal off, cookies had been made by Emma who had previously loved baking in the normal world.
 Everybody had mothered her and welcomed her with open arms, all crowding around the table to speak to her. Lenny and I, obviously missed dinner on our shift but two sandwiches had been saved for us. We took them gratefully, ate them quickly and wanted more desperately, but moderation was key.
  Robert was still in this room. He had disappeared after the service that evening and hadn’t surfaced at all. We all thought best to leave him to grieve. I was told Robert and Nancy had been married over 45 years, maybe even longer I wasn’t sure, no wonder his grief had overcome him. He was as strong man, I’m sure he’ll raid even stronger.
  I couldn’t imagine the pain he was going through after all them years together. When I thought I had lost Samia, I had felt my heart shatter into a thousand pieces. I had heard the pieces clatter against my insides and land in the depths of my stomach. Then, I found out she was alive. She was alive. She had made it. That dreadful night, what now seemed so long ago. The night had brought death and ironically my freedom, but she had survived. How? I didn’t care, I only cared that she lived and that would be mine again.
   Leaving my thoughts behind, I led Isabelle back to our room, showing her the ladies bathroom just down the hall on our way. As we entered the room a squeal erupted and her feet carried her to the mattress faster than my eyes could keep up. The girl had some speed that was for sure. She grabbed the rabbit in her arms and squeezed it tight.
  “I thought it might of been yours.” I smiled widely.
 “No, It wasn’t mine. It was my baby sister’s,” She started after a few seconds. “Now she can be here two.”
  My stomach fell flat against my back and the smile had vanished, I hadn’t known it was her sister’s. I hadn’t even realised she had one, I hadn’t seen a baby there in the house; dead or alive and the picture in the frame only showed Isabelle with her parents. I assumed the playroom had been hers.
  “I’m sorry, Belle.” I whispered softly.
  “Why? She’s still okay. She’s not dead. The zombies didn’t get her.” She beamed.
  Instantly went cold. She couldn’t be alive, could she? The fear slithered through my veins like serpents in pursuit of a meal. Had Emma and I really left a baby to be gnawed on by the mindless set of teeth that sauntered through that house?!
  “She’s with my uncle!” She carried on smiling, throwing herself happily onto the mattress. “She was staying at my uncle’s house with our cousin when the zombies got in. He rang mummy on the phone, saying he’d come and save us, but mummy and daddy said not to. There was too many and said to get far, far away. Daddy said we’d find them one day.”
   I watched her and how bravely she spoke.
  “I’m glad that he didn’t. There would have been nobody to watch Livy whilst he came for us if he did.”
   “Livy? Was that her name? Was it just your uncle and Livy together?”
  “Olivia, but we all called her Livy. She used to smile more at Livy. I don’t think so, he was with my auntie Josephine and my cousin Tommy, maybe my other uncle was there.”
  “How long ago was that, sweetie?”
  “Hmm, I don’t know. A few months ago I guess. I never really learned time very well. School stopped just before my last birthday I think, when it started to get bad and this happened not long after my birthday.” Isabelle muttered rambling to herself. “A year!” She exclaimed proudly, “It’s been nearly a year. I only think of her sometimes. I miss her, but I’m glad she’s alive with Uncle Jerry. I’m too little to look after her properly.”
   I thought how the baby couldn’t possibly survive the plague of the world. It was just so unlikely. A man and his family out there on the road with a crying baby, how would her be able to fight off attacking walkers with a baby cradled in his arm. Isabelle held on tightly to the hope of her baby sister’s survival and her hopes were so unrealistic, it was hard to see it true, but I was not going to be the one to crush her only hopes of her family’s survival.
  “Josh, do you think I’ll see Livy again.” Isabelle asked, looking up at me with hopeful blue eyes; a blue so pale like a spring morning’s sky.
  “Maybe... One day.”  I lied.