Will we ever be ok?

Chapter 15

 Jungkook ended up doing exactly as Jimin had said he would. So the number had been called and Jimin's fake condition had been confirmed, but after the psychiatrist at the hospital examined Jimin, he'd declared him perfectly normal except for having slight depression and a bit of PTSD from the very recent trauma he'd been experiencing for a year. Once that declaration had been made, Jungkook was taken to jail and Jimin stayed with Jin and Namjoon. He stayed at their hotel since he didn't want to go back to the apartment Jungkook had kept him locked up in for so long. The soon to be married couple took care of both Jimin and Sukja, caring for the two as much as possible.

A couple of weeks passed with Jimin trying to adjust to suddenly being away from Jungkook while taking care of his newborn. Some days he'd wake up thinking he was dreaming, that Jungkook wasn't actually in jail, that his friends hadn't ever found out. Some nights he'd dream about the year of solitude he'd experienced with Jungkook, he'd remember the good and the bad. He'd wake up in a cold sweat if he'd remember a particularly horrifying scene and begin crying silently, terrified that Jungkook would get out of jail and come after him. He'd spend those nights curled up in a ball or getting up and holding Sukja who managed to calm him down just by her presence.

On nights that he remembered a kind Jungkook and how sweet he could be at times, he'd wake up longing for those times, for that sweetness. He remembered a lot of the bad but as the weeks passed he'd also started remembering the countless good days he'd had with Jungkook as well, both before and after his abduction. With all those conflicting thoughts and emotions, Jimin felt very out of control and couldn't figure out how to proceed with his life. He'd thought the whole time he was holed up in that flat that the moment he was free of Jungkook, he'd know exactly what he'd do with his freedom, but now that he was free, he had no idea what to do.

His hyungs always offered advice on things he could do, Jin and Namjoon big proponents of him going back to finish his degree. Hoseok and Yoongi had thought it would be better for Jimin to take some time to heal and thought he should find a few hobbies and interests to pursue while attending therapy. Taehyung just wanted Jimin to be happy so he told him he should do whatever he wanted and ultimately the others agree with Taehyung. But none of them understood that the damage that had been done was so great that Jimin wasn't even sure of what he wanted anymore. He wasn't sure what would make him happy. Only taking care of Sukja seemed to do that, though when she'd be asleep and no one was around, Jimin's thoughts would often take dark turns, no one knew that but him of course.

It was currently the end of the third week he'd stayed with Jin and Namjoon and Jimin had just put Sukja to sleep when Jin came into the room.

"Hey, sweetie... I know I'm always asking but... do you want to talk about what happened?" Jin asked. Jin had asked this question multiple times throughout the weeks but Jimin had always refused. He still couldn't bring himself to talk about any of it.

"No," Jimin answered as he watched Sukja sleep beside him. Her small fingers wrapped around his pointer finger.

"Ok, I won't push... but the therapist said it would be good for you to talk... also, I don't know if you're ready to hear this but... they've set a date for the trial," Jin continued looking at Jimin, observing him for any changes.

"When?" Jimin asked not looking up at the elder.

"In another week."

"Ok... you're staying until then?" Jimin asked remembering they'd said they'd rented the hotel room for a month and the month would be up come next week.

"Of course, we're not leaving this place until everything is settled and definitely not without you."

"But... what if I don't want to go?"