Technically Undignified

Chapter 5

"That's horrible. I knew I wouldn't change my mind about these people!" Dan was sat in the castle library with his father, listening to the hate he was spouting. He had known it was a risk to show him LGBT+ history but he thought it would have paid off. Oh well at least he tried.

"Phil isn't like these people though.", he said, lying through his teeth to try and get his dad to agree with him. "He is of another generation so is much better than these ones." Dan almost winced.

"I suppose so. I will support your decision to ally with him but if he tries anything then let me know."

"Tries anything? What do you mean?"

"You know. Tries to make sexual advances on you." Dan could've cried. If he knew, he would stop saying things like this. Stop saying horrible things about Phil. His father stood up. "I must get back to my duties. You may continue resting." No point trying to carry on the conversation now.

"Of course. Thank you father."

*****

Phil was napping on his bed when he woke to a knock on the door. "Yes?"

"Terribly sorry to wake you your majesty. Are you decent?" An unfamiliar voice but Phil let him enter. "Hello your majesty. My name is Peter John but please call me PJ." PJ stuck out a hand for Phil to shake, which he did. "I am Dan's personal adviser. I am familiar with your adviser, Chris Kendall, and he has told me specifics for how your bedroom routines work. I just wanted to clarify the information. I hope this is alright." So he knew Chris. Huh. Small world.

"I am under the impression that Chris watches over you while you sleep."

"You would be correct."

"Good. When I asked why, he said that it was your place to tell me. Forgive my insolence but why do want supervision?" Phil looked down at his lap, sheepish.

"I have nightmares. Bad ones. I need someone on hand to calm me down." PJ smiled sympathetically.

"I understand sir. I'm afraid I'm not qualified to compete such tasks but I'm sure Dan could." PJ winked and Phil's face flushed a deep shade of crimson.

"How do you know about that?"

"I have been told I have a keen eye, sir. Would you like Dan to do this for you?" Phil nodded, unable to speak out of embarrassment. Seriously he thought his face was going to explode.

"Splendid. I shall not intrude any longer then." PJ stood up to leave. "Good day your majesty."

"Wait." PJ obeyed. "How will I get to Dan if I need him?", Phil said, blushing even more. PJ grinned knowingly.

"I had a hand in room placement so I ensured your room was directly next to Dan's. Furthermore, there is a secret door between your rooms. I am the only member of staff who is aware of it, don't fret. You push this stone and it will open." PJ gestured to a stone on the wall, partially hidden by a tapestry, with a clear white blotch on it. Easily distinguishable.

"Thank you PJ."

"It was my pleasure. Do you require anything else?" Phil shook his head. "Understood. Pull the tassel at your bedside if you require my presence. Goodbye your majesty." They waved at each other and PJ left the room. Alone, Phil flopped back onto the bed and smiled a Cheshire Cat smile. Thank God for PJ, he thought blissfully.

*****

Dan slunk into his room in a daze and fell onto his bed, burying his face into his pillow. Why did his dad have to be such a horrible person? He almost felt ashamed to be related to him. The soft pillow welcomed the few tears that that escaped Dan's chocolate eyes until there was a knock at the door.

"Dan? Are you alright?" It was PJ. Dan replied with a long moan, intending to sound negative. "Would you like me to come in?" Dan grunted a yes and PJ ambled in, locking the door behind him. He asked what was wrong and Dan burst into tears. He wailed about his father and his fruitless attempts to change him. PJ listened, until Dan was just hiccuping into his tunic. "I think I have just the thing to make you feel better."

"What?", Dan sniffed, not pulling away.

"Remember the secret door we found when we played hide and seek when you were little?" Dan nodded. "Well I put Phil's room behind it." Dan sat up straight and stared his adviser dead in the eyes.

"You did what?"

"He has nightmares," PJ explained, "and you would like to see him but not just at meetings and such so I thought it was a good idea"

"A good idea? That idea's fucking brilliant. PJ, you, my good sir, are a genius!" PJ laughed.

"I do my best!" After celebrating, they sat back down on the bed, grinning like idiots.

"Which stone is it again?"

"The one with the brown stain and chip in it. The one you broke your nose on after trying to stand up after a long session of masturba-"

"I know the story!", Dan interrupted, not wanting to relive the embarrassment of that story. Dear God that had been a low moment.

"It's a hilarious story. If I ever get invited to be your best man at your wedding, that's the story I'm gonna tell in the speech." They laughed. "Will you ever tell Phil that story?" Dan scoffed.

"Maybe when we've been married for fifty years", Dan said, without thinking. He blushed the colour of a tomato when he thought about that notion. If Phil would ever consider marrying him, that would be the best day of his life. PJ, on the other hand, was smirking.

"Someone's confident."

"Shut your trap PJ." He laughed, walked to the door and unlocked it. Before leaving Dan to set on fire with mortification, he said, "I think you should get to know your future husband a little more. Plus, you two need to get married as soon as possible because I cannot handle the gay tension between you two." Dan laughed sarcastically as PJ slipped through the heavy, wooden door. With PJ gone, Dan jumped about his bedroom, dancing like he had two giraffe arms taped to his body, ecstatic.