So many times we sat in this very spot by the water watching the world go by with fish & chips and smiles on our faces. He'd lace his fingers through mine and bring my hand up to his lips and kiss it which would without a doubt make me weak at the knees every single time without fail. We'd stroll along the promenade until my little legs got tired because I couldn't keep up with his massive strides because he was a giant and me a midget so we'd retreat to the pub for "a swift one" as he put it but we'd drink until we were pissed and we'd stumble and laugh all the way home. The pub we loved has gone now, Just like him.
It's a shell of the place we had spent so much time together. The windows and doors covered in wooden boards and posters and it looks depressing, sort of reflects how I feel inside. Empty. I'm struggling to accept that a place that held such dear memories has been taken from me. Just like him.
"I've seen some proper shit holes in my time Dawesey... but this truly tops the lot" he said the first time I brought him here and I'd been offended but laughed anyway because it was true it was a little bit of a shit hole but I loved it anyway. "It's got its own charm" I argued and he raised his eyebrows as if he didn't really believe me. But he too fell in love with it in the end. I will always love it here because it became our place. But now it's our place without him.
People had always sniggered or made shitty comments when they found out I was engaged to a Captain in the army. Little old Molly Dawes from a council estate in London who had no GCSE's and no direction when it came to a stable career had done good. I'd finally settled down. He was handsome, smart, kind and funny. Did I mention he was bloody handsome? Really bloody handsome with chocolate brown eyes that could melt your soul and he was in love with me.
I'd never been lucky in love, or lucky in anything actually until the day I met him. Lady Luck had been shining down on me that day I can tell you that.
He'd laughed hysterically at me like some weirdo because I'd got on the wrong train and ended up in Bath and he laughed some more as I swore my head off on the platform and like the gent that he was, he offered to at least show me the sights for my troubles and wasn't even offended when I told him to "piss right off" he just stood there... Laughing. He was always laughing. Anyway he was so bloody good looking how could I refuse? Me mums warning about never talking to strangers, well that went right out the window.
We'd been inseparable from that day. Found ourselves the most beautiful seaside apartment only 4 months after meeting and falling in love, with each other and the shithole place that was Southbrook by the sea.
We lived simply. I've never been a flashy girl and I've never had much to my name. He wanted to treat me to all the expensive shit like fancy bags and designer shoes but none of that is me. I didn't need it to know he loved me.
The only time spent apart from each other was his deployments which were killer but he'd promised it was the last one and it was... for the wrong reasons. He came home in a box. I'd lost him.
I lost everything actually. Not only the love of my life but the home we shared, our car. Everything! I couldn't afford any of it on my poultry wage from the seafront coffee shop I worked part time in whilst I studied to try and better myself. So it was insult to injury when I had to leave our happy home behind.
The walls of our home knew love and happiness and laughter and passion. God he was passionate. I'm not just talking about love making, he was passionate about everything and everyone he loved. I loved it when he was so animated about something that there would be this sparkle in his eyes and he'd flash me this killer watt smile when he caught me looking at him with a gormless smile on my face because everything about him just was amazing and he was mine and happiness radiated out of every single pore.
Now I live in a house share because I couldn't bare to go back to London. Back to the place that had never really felt like home with me dad getting right on me tits and me mum looking at me like I might break at any given moment. No way could I go back to my old life that didn't have him in it.
A house share was the only way I could afford to stay in this little seaside town that was our place but I needed to be here. Needed to be near the sea where we'd scattered him.
-OG-
A/N Southbrook is a fictional place (hopefully lol)
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