Unplanned

Chapter 1: Positive

    Ian really didn't know what was wrong with him, he had started feeling weird before his little sleepover with Mickey, too tired, ill at the slightest smells. He knew that thirty percent of the male population were carriers but it never dawned on him that he may be in that minority until Lip made a joke one day.

  He'd just been sick again, vigorously scrubbed the taste of puck out of his mouth and was making his way back into his shared room. Flopping back down on his bed he threw his arm over his face and waited for the nausea to die down and the bone deep exhaustion to set back in. He heard the door open and close again but didn't move, a headache was setting in and he just wanted to fall back asleep yet he couldn't. School was a thing and Fiona would kill him if he didn't go.

  "Hey man you okay?" he heard Lip ask only groaning in response. That got him a little chuckle from the older boy, "Sure Milkovich hasn't knocked you up?"

  The way he said it it was meant as a joke but Ian sat bolt upright and stared. Neither of them used protection when they had sex, Mickey was usually the bottom and the amount of time he spent getting fucked and never getting pregnant showed he was in that seventy percent. Ian though... Ian had never bottomed for anyone but Mickey and then they hardly ever did it as Mickey preferred it when Ian fucked him. It was... it was a scary possibility.

  "Fuck," he breathed at the realisation and Lip's eyes widened.

  "You mean..." he trailed off.

  "I mean he's fucked me and spunked in my ass with no condom," Ian finished crudely.

  "Fuck man don't need that in my head. Now Fiona always keeps pregnancy tests, go now and pee on that stick Ian. Now," Lip said firmly, pointing back at the bathroom.

  Ian stood on shaking legs and made his way there, shutting the door and pulling the test out from the cabinet. Being sick hadn't really given him time to relieve himself so he easily found it in himself to piss on it but then he was putting the cap on and collapsing down beside the toilet. What the fuck would happen if it was positive? He and Mickey had only just gotten to a good place and if he was Mickey would... 

  Who was he kidding, they were over anyway. Since Terry had beaten the shit out of Mickey the morning after Ian had stayed over the brunette hadn't spoken to him. He kind of understood, Mickey was scared but Ian knew if it were him he wouldn't let it stop him- by now he wasn't afraid to let himself acknowledge that he had fallen for the tattooed thug. That night Ian had stayed over had been amazing... he had fallen asleep with Mickey in his arms after a night of Xbox and sex. Not that it would ever happen again.

  The redhead felt a hand on his shoulder then and realised that he had curled in on himself, head on his knees, tears on his cheeks and the test clutched in a death grip. Looking up finally, he saw that it was Lip crouched down in front of him with the comforting hand on his shoulder and a concerned look.

  "What is it?" he asked quietly.

  It was then that he realised he hadn't actually looked at the thing. He was almost- no completely- scared to. Ian unfurled his shaking fingers and looked down at the thing, heart stopping when he saw the little cross. Well fuck he was screwed. Knocked up at seventeen. A knocked up seventeen year old dude on the south side because nothing screamed "I like to take it up the ass" more than a guy with a baby bump.

  "Fuck Lip, fuck," he whispered, letting his hand droop so his brother could see the result and his shame.

  "Right, right Ian we need to go to the clinic, get this confirmed okay," Lip told him, what would Ian do without his big brother?

  "Alright, just don't- don't tell Fiona," Ian said quietly. He would not by any means be able to deal with Fiona and her judgemental bullshit right now.

  "No, promise."

***

  He was sat on his bed again where this day from hell began. Ian was definitely pregnant. Pregnant with Mickey Milkovich's baby. He was so fucked. 

  Lip was sat at the end of the bed watching Ian even though neither of them were saying anything. Ian on his part really couldn't get his brain to cooperate with forming thoughts more than fuck fuck fuck. He couldn't tell Mickey but he couldn't hide it from Mickey. He was seventeen this screwed him up going to the army.

 "You going to keep it?" Lip asked then, cutting through the chaos in Ian's head.

  "I..." Ian started but stopped.

  He hadn't thought about that even being a possibility; getting rid of it. That would make it easier, he wouldn't have to tell anyone, only Lip would ever know, it could all go away and Ian would be left with the knowledge that he was a carrier and to be more careful in the future. The thought hadn't crossed his mind though before. It hadn't been an option to him and now that it was it seemed... horrible. Ian didn't want to get rid of the life in his belly. It was part of him and it was part of Mickey, someone that he had fallen in love with even if his feelings weren't reciprocated. But then again there was a moment that he thought they were.

  "I know... I know this is really, monumentally stupid but I want to keep it. Something-   something happened and I don't think that Mickey and I will be anything again. This... baby is part of what I had and I know it's stupidly romantic and sappy and impractical but I don't think I could live with myself if I got an abortion," Ian told his brother, making sure to keep eye contact.

  For a long moment Lip just stared back, it looked like he was mulling over Ian's words. There was a look of despair on his face and Ian hated that he was the reason behind it.

  "Okay... okay man. It's your body, your life. But um the army'll be out. Can't see Mickey being a dad to this kid," Lip replied eventually.

  "Yeah I know. Lets face it I wasn't getting into Westpoint anyway," Ian smiled sadly.

  "Okay man. Um... what thing was it that happened with you and Mickey that was so bad? I mean juvie couldn't keep you apart so what exactly happened?" Lip asked.

  Ian took a deep breath and sat up straighter. Truth was he still had nightmares about that day, Terry beating him then Mickey harder. Terry making that Russian fuck his... Mickey, rape him. The broken look on Mickey's face.

  "Terry caught us," Ian breathed after a pause. That should be explanation enough.

  "Fuck," Lip breathed.

  "Fuck," Ian agreed.