Unplanned

Chapter 2: Punch to the Gut

  Ian still hadn't come up with a plan of action by the time he went into school the two weeks later and heard the news on Mickey. He had gotten Lip to swear to secrecy so as of yet he and the lady at the clinic were the only ones aware of the existence of the bundle of cells floating around in the redhead's previously unknown womb. To be honest he didn't even know if he would be able to get close enough to Mickey ever again to actually tell him and as for his family, they would definitely find out that he was pregnant around the time his stomach started to swell.

    Already by that point he had read an absurd amount of information on pregnancies and their development, what and what not to do for a healthy baby, what to expect ect. When it came to looking into actual baby care however he got a mental block and couldn't physically bring himself to look that up. That would make it too real. Not that he needed to now anyway, he was only just over a month into it, he didn't need to worry about that for another eight months. 

  Mandy seemed to be very uptight that day in school, bit Karen Jackson's head right off although he would support that- Karen needed to stay well away from his brother. Then she dropped the bomb though; Mickey was getting married.

***

  He strode to the abandoned building with purpose having found that he was in fact marrying the Russian. How funny was it that his thug had knocked up both of them. All he thought about though was confronting Mickey but he still didn't know if telling him about their baby was for the best. Mickey may have been marrying this whore because he'd knocked her up but there had to be more behind it, the whole thing stunk of Terry.

  By the time the pair had made their way back out down onto the barren ground outside the building once more, Ian was blue in the face and still hadn't confessed. The confession would either make it better or a hundred times worse and the redhead wasn't sure if he could take the latter.

  After that he made the mistake of goading Mickey. He didn't really believe that Mickey would do it, thought that after everything Mickey would have cared, would have loved him. The older boy didn't just hit him though, he hit him in the gut, winding him and sending a panicked chill through his body. Mickey didn't realise, he didn't know what he had just done, but Ian felt sick, what if that was it. What if Mickey had unknowingly killed the baby.

  "You love me and you're gay," he had to say it just once. He had to say it now of all times just to try and stave off the panic that was threatening to take over him.

  All it got him was another punch and then a kick to the face, jarring his jaw and leaving him on the ground as Mickey walked away. The thing was, he hadn't missed the pained look in the other's eyes or the panicked, desperate way that he turned away. He knew that Mickey had to love him really, care for him at least even if he had just hit him and walked away. Knowing Mickey like no one else he knew it was probably to protect him, push him away, push him away from Terry.

  Running a hand over his still flat belly Ian couldn't help but feel the hurt though. He couldn't help the sobs that tore from his throat as he sat up and curled around his stomach at the thought that it could once again be empty. His face throbbed and he knew he was going to have some impressive bruises but that didn't matter, the baby mattered. It was stupid, so stupid to be so attached to a bunch of cells but they were special and they would one day be a life. One day if they were still there...

 ***

  He had eventually managed to pull himself up and made his way back towards the inhabited parts of Chicago. Instead of going anywhere else he went straight to the clinic, he needed to be sure either way even if the thought terrified him.

  Leaving he could breathe again, leaving he was able to focus of the dull throb of his face and the cold pack that the nurse had given him. Ian still had the baby, it was fine so far, he was still pregnant. He couldn't help but snort at that thought, still pregnant. As if any other seventeen year old before him had been pleased at that revelation. He was so fucked up.

  As soon as he collapsed back down in his bed though it really hit him, the whole situation and what had passed. The second Gallagher son had managed to sneak in with no one noticing- not a massive feat as as the quiet middle kid he was able to fade into the background relatively well- and so hadn't had to answer questions. Now though the tears were coming again as he pressed the compress to his face, the thing not really cold anymore, facing the wall and trying to be as quiet as possible.

  Mickey was getting married to the whore who raped him at gunpoint. Really he couldn't even be angry at her, she was probably not too pleased about the baby even if getting a green card would give some security. That day she had exactly looked pleased about having to have sex with the bruised and bloody teen that was Mickey. He couldn't be mad at Mickey either, this would be hell for him. It was Terry he could be angry at, it was all that fat, homophobic, bigoted prick's fault.

  Thing was, in that moment he was feeling too broken to be angry. Ian was filled too full of sadness and despair to be angry.

  The door opened and Ian held his breath, trying to stifle the  hiccuping sobs that wanted out.  He was very glad that he was facing the wall so that he could hide away. But then there was a hand on his shoulder and he knew it was Lip so he turned into his brother and buried his face in the older boy's stomach.

  They didn't hug often, not really. When one was upset it was a pat on the back and the offer of weed but Ian couldn't smoke weed now and he was heartbroken and overly hormonal so fuck it. Lip on his part didn't hesitate to run his hand over Ian's buzzed hair and lean down slightly, curling up around him as Ian gripped his shirt and struggled against the tears. After a moment of just breathing in the familiar comfort of his brother, he got himself under control and pulled away.

  "Shit man, that's nasty. Mickey by any chance?" Lip guessed as soon as he took in Ian's face.

  "Yeah, he um. Well I went to confront him about the marriage and it didn't... he punched me in the gut too Lip," Ian whispered, voice hoarse from crying.

  "Fuck Ian, is the baby... is it okay?" Lip hissed out, leaning in slightly.

  "Yeah I went to check it out at the clinic, it's still there. But I... Lip I didn't tell him, I didn't tell Mickey and now he's just going to get married," Ian told him, voice wavering as it hit him all again.

  "Okay, okay man but- but at least it's still there right. That's what you wanted," Lip tried to reassure.

  "Yeah, I know it's stupid and I should have jumped at the chance at... and Fiona's going to kill me when she finds out but I want this a stupid amount," Ian told him, looking down at his hands.

  "I get you Ian, I do. Remember how excited I was when I thought I was going to be a dad with Karen?" 

  "Yeah, I- yeah," Ian looked up and smiled then. He hadn't really thought about it but he had remembered how heartbroken his brother had been when the baby turned out to be Asian. Just that thought made him feel better because Lip did understand. His brother truly wasn't judging him for this choice, he really did support this.

  "I don't think I'm going to tell Mickey," he made up his mind then, "he's having this one baby with that woman anyway. I think- I think that Terry really will kill us both if he finds out about this."

  "Okay man, I think... fuck I don't know what to think, you know I don't like Mickey or how you feel about him but- but that sounds good," Lip nodded.

  "Thank you Lip, I mean it, thank you so much," Ian told him then because he meant it. He would be lost without Lip right now.

  "Just doing my job as big brother," Lip smiled, gripping the back of Ian's neck briefly before getting up, "I'll tell Fiona you're asleep and won't be down for dinner."

  "Thanks," Ian smiled, watching as his brother left. He would deal with this, he could do this even if it hurt.