thirty three

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We spent the next week distributing bags around town as we finished the Christmas shopping. Mostly we made it a secret Santa thing; watching to see when a group would venture from their camp in the morning and then leaving enough bundles for everyone we'd seen. 

The bags were labeled by size only, with a mix of clothing that we figured could be exchanged with someone else's if it wasn't what they wanted. Instead of marking some for men and some for women, which Charlotte had quickly pointed out was not only sexist but exclusionary to nonbinary people, we'd simply made a visible note of which ones contained pads and tampons.

It was Saturday when Halley and I found ourselves waiting outside the nearest library, which shared a parking lot with the mall. A very full lot, being as Christmas was only three days away. People experiencing homelessness often parked their bikes outside of the library to seek shelter in bad weather and use the restroom. Anyone battling addiction could even make use of the anonymous needle exchange station available in the bathroom, which was provided by the county to help curb the use of dirty needles. 

Halley was crossing Christmas things off her list while keeping an eye on the steady stream of foot and bike traffic, and I was just watching her. That golden hair was down around her shoulders, almost touching the seat, droplets still sitting in it from getting gas before this. I reached to smooth them off and she turned to me as rain fell steadily around us, the world outside the car washed in gray, the interior full of the sun that was her smile.

"Listen," I said, pulling gently so she moved close enough for me to kiss. "I love you."

"Listen," she echoed just as earnestly, kissing me now. "I know."  Her eyes twinkled with mischief. 

The windows were steaming up, Winter Wonderland playing softly on the radio, and I couldn't think of a time I'd been happier. "You make me really happy," I said, inarticulate, even though of course she knew. "Like, the happiest I've ever been. I don't even have words for it," I added honestly, moving a strand of hair off her forehead. What I meant was thank you but it seemed so inadequate.  

"Mary," my lovely girlfriend said, taking my face gently between her hands. "We don't need words." She kissed me again, and of course what she said was true. 

My phone vibrated in my pocket but I ignored it, because duh. It buzzed twice more and I groaned as I took it out and reluctantly pulled away from her.

A text from Leif, saying only come home.

Fuck. I showed it to Halley and she started the car immediately, yanking her seatbelt across her and trying to jam it into the holder with a shaky hand. "Shit!"

"Here," I said, taking it and sliding it in so it clicked. I did my own, my hands amazingly still. Because even though I was expecting the worst, it hadn't hit me yet. "At least he didn't say go to the hospital," my filterless ass said as we jerked on our seat belts and she peeled out with a screech of tires. 

I fumbled to readjust the heater vent as the warm air blew out, and when I was done she grabbed my hand and squeezed it too tightly. I tried to call Leif but it went straight to voicemail so I just texted that we were on our way, because that's all I could do.

We were only a few miles away from home but with the holiday traffic, three minutes became eight. They seemed interminable, and we sat in anxious silence until we got close enough to see the flashing lights from the two cop cars parked in front. "Fuck," I said, helplessly. Please let the kids be okay, I continued to beg whatever entity might have control over any of this. Please, please, please. The fact that there wasn't an ambulance was a good sign, though it could have already left.

Mary and Halley (sequel to When Mary Met Halley)Where stories live. Discover now