From Infinite to Kamikaze: A Novel

NOVEMBER 1998 - LEX

I pulled up at the Coleman Young Rec Center around 5pm that Saturday afternoon. I had Em's car cuz mine was in the shop. Winter in Detroit meant making sure your car had tires with decent tread, top notch windshield wipers, and brakes that stopped on a dime, so my mom had made arrangements for me to get that taken care of before the heavy snow started. I parked and grabbed the bottled water I had just bought at Sunoco while filling up his tank.

Once inside, I found him exactly where he said he'd be...in the gym, playing basketball with a huge group of people, some I knew and some I didn't. I leaned against the door to watch him. He had bleached his hair blonde a few weeks back during a drunken recording session with Dre. At first he wasn't sure he wanted to keep it, but Dre, Proof, and I all thought it matched the Slim Shady persona perfectly. So he kept it. He was wearing black basketball shorts with a white stripe on each side and a black wifebeater, showing off his newest Slim Shady tat he had gotten a couple of months ago.

Em was a monster on the court. Dribbling between his legs, fancy footwork, making three pointers, blocking shots, and of course talkin' smack. I remembered back to a day a couple years ago when he tried to "teach me a thing or two about basketball".

I had played on a county intramural team from 4th-8th grade, so I already knew a thing or two about the game. He had been surprised at my skills, what little I had, and we had played a rousing game of one-on-one that day. He didn't even let me win! But the score was close anyway. I was much more adept at watching basketball than I was at playing it and we shared a love for our local Pistons, whose season had been interrupted due to the infamous NBA lockout that was currently happening.

"Time! Time!" someone yelled, making a T with their hands. Em made his way over to me while the other team huddled up.

"What's the score?" I asked as he jogged up to me.

"14-18. We whippin' they asses," he bragged breathlessly as he leaned down with his hands on his knees. I smiled as I handed him the ice cold water.

"You da best baby." He kissed me with salty lips before chugging the drink. He was so sweaty, but it was a huge turn-on. A heavy feeling started in the pit of my stomach as I secretly wished I could find a utility closet or a bathroom stall to drag him into at that moment.

"We only playin' to 20, so lemme finish schoolin' these clowns real quick and then we can get up outta here. Like 10 minutes, tops," he said, handing me back the water. He ran backwards back to the court, a sexy grin flashing at me the whole way. 

I found a spot in the corner of the room, far away from the baskets, and sat with my legs pulled up to my chest. Others were also waiting up against the walls. Some looked like they were waiting for people, others looked like they were waiting for the court to free up so they could play. I noticed a few girls, probably high schoolers, giggling and pointing in the direction of Marshall. They were dressed like they wanted to be noticed and I wondered how long they had been there.

Ten minutes later, I watched Em pull on a pair of sweatpants while he talked to Proof who had also been playing. The girls confidently walked over to them and started noticeably flirting. Proof was being his usual friendly self but I couldn't see what Em was doing cuz his back was to me. He continued getting dressed as the girls were talking and touching his tattoos. Meanwhile, he pulled on a sweatshirt, backwards cap, and changed his shoes. I was fuming but hadn't stood up yet. He stuffed his basketball into his gym bag along with his other shoes, slung it over his bag, and gave Proof daps. Proof waved to me and yelled "What up shawty?!" before heading out the opposite exit. I finally stood up as Em approached me. I hadn't been able to tell if he had actually talked to the girls and I wasn't sure if I should ask. I didn't wanna seem like a jealous, paranoid girlfriend. But I was also curious. What did they want?

"You ready baby?" he asked, putting his arm around me and leading me out of the gym. "What you wanna do about food tonight? I'm fuckin' famished."

Was he really gonna pretend like that didn't just happen?? What do I do?? What would the non-girlfriend Lex do?

"I could go for some Taco Bell," I said nonchalantly.

"You read my mind girl," he said, opening the gym doors leading outside. 

I worked up the nerve to say something as we stepped onto the parking lot. "Looks like you got fans on the court now too," I smirked at him.

"Huh? Oh, those girls?" He sucked his teeth. "Man, they just some silly ass little hoochies that ain't got nothin' better to do than sit up here scoutin' for some dick."

"Yours?" I asked with a sideway glance. 

He stopped and looked at me. "What? You jealous?" he smiled satisfactorily. I rolled my eyes and started walking again but he stopped me by grabbing my waist and pulling me into him. "Ain't nobody gettin' near this but you baby," he murmured in my ear. "You hear me?"

I turned around to face him and nodded, pulling the sides of his hoodie down towards me for a kiss. "Mmm..." he grunted, rubbing his hands all over my ass. "Right here in the parking lot? I'm down." He smiled as he picked me up and tossed me over his shoulder. I laughed and smacked his ass all the way to the car.

That night we hung out at my house since my mom was working and Em was gonna go to the studio early in the morning, which was closer to my place than his. We had picked up Taco Bell and ice cream on the way home and spread our food out on the coffee table so we could watch South Park with our dinner. Em did the best Cartman impression I've ever seen and had me in tears from laughter.

After eating, I rolled us a blunt to go with our beers. Nestled in the crook of his arm, we swayed slowly in the porch swing with a blanket over us, the night stars bright in the clear winter sky above us. We had brought the boombox outside and were vibing hard to Method Man's new off the chain album Tical 2000: Judgment Day.

"This right here baby," he said in a low voice, pulling me closer as I hit the J. "This is exactly how it should feel when it's meant to be." A fiery, tingly feeling encompassed my entire chest area as his words resonated in my head. I made a mental note to remember them for my journal later. He kissed my cheek, prompting me to turn to him for a real kiss. Once again, electricity soared through my body, heating me from the inside out as soon as his lips made contact with mine. I wondered how I got so lucky.

"So, I got a little trip comin' up," he said, taking his turn with the blunt. "I gotta go to Cali next month from the 13th to the 15th to shoot the video for My Name Is... and I'ma be doin' a show at The Whiskey while I'm out there."

"The Whiskey? The Whiskey A Go Go?" I asked, raising my eyebrows.

"Yeah, you heard of it?"

"Uh...yeah," I answered matter-of-factly. "Some pretty big names have played there. Soundgarden, Hole, Oasis....I love Oasis. That's awesome you're doing a show there baby! I wish I could come with you but that's finals week," I said disappointedly.

"Damn," he said sadly. "I wanted you to come since you ain't come to the last video shoot." I grabbed his coat and pulled him closer to me.

"I'm sorry boo. But I'm sure you're gonna have lots more video shoots I can come to," I said, looking up at him adoringly.

"Think so?"

"Know so." His soft, supple lips met mine again and we resumed our album-listening/smoking session from the comfort of the padded porch swing, wrapped in the warmth of each other's arms under the fleece blanket.