Chapter 11

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Lexi's POV

"No, no, no.." Tears stream down my face as I slide down the bathroom wall

"What am I going to do."

This wasn't suppose to happen.

My head was against the door. The light of my plain white bathroom blinding me. "No.. I was drunk. It was all a dream." I rock back and forth. I felt like I was in a mental home. Everything felt small around me. The air felt tight. And my lungs felt like they were giving out on me.

I couldn't believe at what I had done.

I slept with Park Jimin.

My thumb hovered over the contact. Should I call him? Er no. I'll call her. No... I can't. She told me not to get close, and I did. I'll just call Kylie. She'll know what to say. Right? Maybe slap me around a few times when I see her but she'll know..no.. I can't call anyone. No one can know.. They warned me. And now all they will say is. Face yourself. I slowly get up from the floor. I look at the mirror.

This isn't me. The girl I was looking at had dark circles around her eye's. Blood shot from the tears she shed. Her body weak because she had given the only pure thing away. She didn't even love him. Right?

I can barley remember last night. I woke up and Jimin was naked. So was I.

How can I face him when I can't bring myself to open the door. I have to be strong. I'm not even positive about my feelings for him. God knows if I like him, Maryanna and Namjoon will rip my head off.

I wipe my tears away, trying to compose myself. I slowly walk out of the bathroom and into my bedroom.

"Lexi?" He was sitting at the end of the bed. He was only wearing boxers.

"Did we?" He paused as he watches me put my head down, nodding slowly.

"Shit." He whispers. I look at him. I didn't want it to come out rude but it kinda did.

"I think you should leave Jimin. We both know we weren't ourselves last night and we need to compose ourselves today before we face eachother."

He looks up at me with a cold expression. "Why can't we talk about it now?"

"Will you put clothes on?"

Me and Jimin were seated on my desk chairs that were in my room.

"Jimin, about last night... I know it was unmeaning-"

"You think I didn't mean what I did to you." Rolling my eye's I shake my head.

"Jimin, i'm meaning emotionally. We never confirmed our feeling for each other."

"How do you feel about me then?"

Tears roll down my cheek. "Is it bad that i'm in love with you. I realize my feeling for you are true. Im just not aloud to feel them." I was scared for his reaction. I didn't know how he felt. He gets up grabbing his bag and key's.

"Lexi, you need to stay away from me. I'm no good for you." He was about to leave, until I grab his wrist.

"Jimin.. What do you mean?"

"I don't love you nor like you. I only used you."

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Maryanna's POV

"This is really good Mare, why haven't you touched your Kimchi?"

Me and Namjoon were at a restraunt for a little date. But all that was on my mind was last night. I didn't want to start anything with her. I just don't want her hurt.

"I'm sorry Joonie, I just."

"I know. We'll visit her today and check on her. Just eat please." I nod, taking bites of my Kimchi.

"I hope she will forgive me."

"Don't blame yourself. We warned her. And if we have to we will tell her about Song Chae and how he was and always be."

After awhile me and Namjoon finish lunch and head over to Lexi's.

"Why isn't she answering- Jimin?" Jimin walks out the door with a bag around his shoulders and his keys.

"Hi.. Um I'll see you guy's at the dorm."

"Hm odd..." Me and Namjoon walk in the apartment. Evetything seemed fine. But Jimin seemed off.

"Lexi?" I open her door to see her on the floor sobbing.

"Lexi! What's wrong." I rush to her and lift her head up to se her tear stained face.

"You guy's were right. I should have listened." I look at Namjoon and he shrugs his shoulders kneeling down to Lexi's level.

"Lexi, what happened?"

"He used me. He fucking played me." Namjoon gets up, speed walking to the door. "Im going to beat his ass!"

"Namjoon wait!" He comes back kneeling in front of lexi.

I grab lexi, and sit her on the bed.

"Did you guys have sex?" I ask. She nods.

"Im so ashamed. Im sorry I didn't listen, it's all my fault!"

"No it isn't lexi. We can't help who we fall in love with. I just want to know what he said to you."

"I told him that I realized I loved him and he said he didnt love me back and he only used me. Told me to stay away from him. Mare... I love him." She puts her face in hands, sobbing. Me and Namjoon sit next to her and confort her.

"Lexi.. You're not going to do anything stupid right?" She looks up at me tears still falling. "What do you mean." I look at Namjoon and he nods taking my place.

Namjoon takes her hands in his, rubbing circles on her hand.

"Lexi awhile back, before we met you, Jimin 'dated' this girl named Song Chae. He was using her just for his pleasure. As a leader I always told Bangtan. You guys make your own choices and all I can do is watch you learn from your mistakes. Jimin finally got what he wanted and dumped her, telling her she was just a toy. He never loved her. But she was madly in love with him. Later on we get a call that she hung herself two days after the brake up. They were telling us that we were invited to the funeral. Of course we went, except for Jimin. Because he was actually hurt. He blamed himslef for her death. And still does. Chae's parents found Jimin and went up to him, telling him that he was a murderer, a worthless human being. He hasn't gotten close to girls ever sense. Until he met you. Thinking maybe his wound was healed. But in reality he isn't. Jimin will realize at what he done. He's saying that because he doesn't want you to end up like Chae.in his words. He doesn't want to be the cause of another girls death."
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Jimin's POV

"Stupid, stupid, stupid!!" I bang my head against my headboard of my bed. I didn't want this. I didn't want her to love me. I honestly didn't plan on having sex with her.. I only wanted to be her friend. And maybe more later. She isn't suppose to love me. I mean, I like her. I have feelings. But god DAMNIT she can't love me. I'm no good for her. I had nothing else to do but tell her I used her. I just can't risk it getting worse and her ending up like Chae.

I hear the door of our dorm slam shut.

"PARK FREAKIN JIMIN!!" I hear Namjoon Hyung yell.

Shit.

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