imagines | sean lew

- if only

third person pov

sean sat at his usual spot of a cafe. all the way in the corner, near the windows. he always went there. he went there so much that the baristas memorized his order and always saved the table just for him. they knew what he was going through. they knew all about what happened. that's why they always felt bad when they saw him.

he would always walk in with his head down low, covering his face with the black hoodie he always wore. he didn't want anyone to see how he looked but when others did, they would feel almost pity for the poor boy. his face would be stained with tears. his eyes puffy. really bad dark circles under his eyes. his hair looked almost like he hasn't combed it for months. he was like this all because of a girl. that girl was named y/n and y/l/n.

it was all his fault though. he hated himself for what he did to her.

it all started when he attended one of his friends parties. he had way too many shots that night. he was drunk. he began to hit on other girls but fortunately they all rejected him except one. they both hit it off and next thing you know they woke up next to each other the next morning. after realizing what he had just done, sean rushed to put his clothes on and left the girl that slept soundly on the bed. thoughts filled his mind as he drove over to her house. "what the fuck did i do? y/n is going to hate me!" he banged on the door multiple times until it opened. the girl that he hurt was right in front of him. she gave him a warm smile before gesturing him inside.

his heart was beating so fast when he walked in. "we need to talk." sean said before walking to the living room of her home. as y/n followed behind, thoughts filled her mind. she was nervous. she sensed that something was wrong.

they both sat down, y/n facing him but sean didn't look at her. it hurt him even more if he did. "what's wrong sean?" she asked softly.

"im sorry."

"sorry for what?"

"i did something bad. something that will make you hate me. something that i regret."

"just tell me lew."

sean looked up at her, his eyes were glassy. tears wanting to fall. he told her everything that had happened last night. he told her how sorry he was. he told her that he didn't mean to do it. y/n was quiet the whole time. she hadn't said a word. her head was low, not facing him as he explained.

"y/n say something. please." sean begged as he lightly gripped on her wrists. she immediately pulled away. she looked up at him, tears running down her face.

it broke sean. he loved her so much and it hurt to see her like this. it hurt even more knowing that he was the reason for this.

"get out." she said softly. there was hurt and hatred in her voice. "please."

"i love you y/n but i'll go." sean whispered, shedding a tear, before getting up from the couch.

"im so sorry." sean said before leaving her.

———

sean wiped away the tears that began to fall when he remembered exactly what had happened.

if only he listened to y/n when she asked him to stay with her that night.
if only he hadn't gotten drunk and had a one night stand none of this would've happened.
if only