≡
letting someone into your life after
so long is hard, loving them
again is even harder.
—q.byme━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀the thoughts had started so suddenly, as they always did, and it scared him, to a huge extent. he thought about hurting himself, picturing where every single sharp, or bladed object was, as well as all the things he wanted to do with them.
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀he wanted to end himself. he wanted to end everything. end the pain, the suffering, and the frustration he had with his forgotten memories. jisung yearned to know, practically begged himself, yet it still wouldn't work.
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀jisung tried to keep his skin clean, and he was, for about a month, until tonight after his draining day at therapy, and talking to his psychologist for hours on end about things that seemed too irrelevant for him to remember, with his shattered mind and crippling depression.
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀the only reason that he started to remember, however, was caused by a male his age in mid-day. this man had came up to his door, and acted as if he knew jisung for years, requesting that they have coffee as soon as he possibly could, simply for a so called, important conversation.
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀certainly, he said yes. jisung figured that from the way he was acting, they had known each other, and deep down, still knew, and because of this thought process, he also concluded that he had to know something. he'd said yes, simply because his questions were eating him away; devouring him, and he couldn't take it any longer.
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀when they had arrived at the café, they had ordered a normal coffee, with standard vanilla creamer, and took the table closest to the window, which viewed the evening traffic of seoul.
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀"you must be confused." the male chuckled from pity, sipping his coffee. "i talked to your therapist, and he suggested that i keep an eye on you, for your safety."
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀"oh really?" jisung chuckled, and refrained from touching his coffee, still stubborn with the intention of continuously depriving himself of everything, besides water. "there really is no need, you know. i'm not important, and even if i died tomorrow, this world would still be spinning without me."
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀"he wouldn't want you to say those things, you know." the male spoke out as if he wasn't even speaking directly to jisung, but as if it was a thought for which he accidentally said out loud. "my name is minho. i know you probably don't remember me, but we've known each other since we were kids. so please, trust me."
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀jisung nodded, and took one sip of his coffee before throwing it into the trash can beside him, forcing himself to present no emotion to hide the fact he secretly wanted to break down into tears.
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀"you want to know,
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀don't you, jisung?"
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀
⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀—end/03
YOU ARE READING
𝐁𝐔𝐑𝐘 𝐀 𝐅𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐃 .
Fanfiction𝐎𝐍 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐃 ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢'𝐯𝐞 𝐝𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐛𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐧. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀𝐄𝐗𝐏𝐋𝐈𝐂𝐈𝐓 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐓; ⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀𝐉 & 𝐇 | ©𝐊𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐀𝐅𝐔𝐂𝐊 ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀...