Marry Me - Mat Barzal

Sara ~ One

Mat and I were childhood friends.
I remember growing up so close to him.

When we were five we would both strap on roller blades and go skating down the street. He would make me play goalie for him and sometimes he would peg me for the fun of it.

In return I dressed him up in my clothes and did his makeup. And I would make him strut down the makeshift "runway", which was really just the hallway.

Our parents just thought we were being cute kids.

Sleepovers at each other's houses were the weekend thing and we would always find a way to entertain ourselves, either by watching hockey or playing hockey in the driveway.

Sometimes I would make him pretend to play wedding with me.

I would make one of our parents pronounce us husband and wife, and those cute little baby lips would give me a tiny peck on the mouth.

When we were twelve we were inseparable, and instead of runways we would rollerblade down to the movie theater and sneak in to every movie. Even the R-rated ones.

That's when I started having nightmares.
He still made me play goalie although I was a terrible one. He would score almost every time. And he would still peg me with the puck just for fun.

Sleepovers were a thing of past because of puberty or something. At least that's what our parents said.

But I missed those sleepovers, especially since it was hard to sleep in general, let alone without him. It had been routine.

Play pretend weddings were replaced with questions, "What kind of flowers do you want at our wedding?" He asked jokingly, to amuse our parents.

"Probably Magnolias." I laughed, playing along.

When we were eighteen, and seniors in high school, we were each others support systems. I was at every Thunderbirds game. I remember the night that he won the WHL championship like the back of my hand.

Flashback

Seattle was down two against Regina in the third period of the game and the arena was buzzing in anticipation of what would happen next.
The Thunderbirds haven't given up yet. Gropp let the puck fly and it went in the net, bringing the team within one with four minutes left in regulation.
I jumped up out of my seat, too excited and nervous to do anything but cheer.

Finally with two minutes left Kolesar ripped a one-timer past the Regina goaltender, tying the game 3-3.

I was sweating.

I wanted this for the team. I wanted it for Mat; he worked so hard for this.

After a couple minutes of holding my breath it was time for OT and pretty quickly Mat set up True for a shot which went in. They won!

The team sprinted out onto the ice, gathering in a huge group hug and crying and shouting.
They did it.
I can't believe he did it.

After the game the team, their girlfriends and some of their friends went to Jakes. It was the local diner they always went to after a win.

Mat and his other co-captain gave a cute little speech about how hard they had worked and how proud they all were of each other.
The pride in his eyes gleamed and then he looked over to me. I just smiled and he ran over and wrapped me in the tightest hug.

"I can't believe you did it. I'm so proud of you. You are such a good leader." He released his tight hold on me, but not by much, his hands still lingering on my waist as he looked into my eyes.

"I couldn't have done it if it weren't for you. You were always there for me. You pushed me to be a better player and person." I felt a little spark in my chest, and my heart sped up as he leaned in. Just as his lips were about to touch mine, Alexander True came over clapping Mat on the back.

"Barzy! What a pass man....."

Mat just gave me a sheepish smile as Alexander dragged him over to a few other teammates.
He looked over his shoulder at me a little longingly, a little confused as he raised a brow, and I just laughed. But boy was my heart hammering out of my chest right now.

Eighteen was fun and confusing and heart breaking. I knew he was leaving for New York soon and I knew I couldn't go with him.
The feelings I had been hiding since we were 15 had a chance to dissipate. But the thought of living so far away had me in tears.

We spent the whole summer together, every last minute dedicated to making a new memory.

Sleep overs were a thing because you couldn't separate us, even if you wanted to. I slept better when he was there.
It was comfortable. It was routine. It was what I had known my whole life.

The day he left was the hardest, I was a wreck. But I was so proud of him and where his future was leading him.

I dropped him off at the airport with the promise that I would be visiting at Thanksgiving when I had a break from college, and that he would be home when I came home for Christmas. But that seemed like an awful long time to be away from someone you had spent your whole life attached at the hip to.

A few months had passed and I went to see him. He looked like he was in his natural element. His rookie season had been insane so far, and he looked happy. Like he was floating or something.

Thanksgiving was fun because he took me to all of his favorite spots on the island and in the city. It was like I was learning something new about him and it was exciting.

Of course I went to some Islander games. He surprised me with his jersey and forced me to wear it to every game while I was there.

I didn't mind wearing it though. It reminded me of him.

When he came home for Christmas early it surprised me. I couldn't help but throw myself around him, hugging him and telling him how much I missed him like crazy.

And when he won the Calder I was right there with him in Vegas telling him how much I believed in him. I knew he would win it. I had watched every game and knew that he had done something special.

But the following year was different. I had met someone and he was amazing and kind and sweet and everything I wanted.
Mat seemed distant when I told him.

And when I brought Nate to New York the following spring break to meet Mat, things felt forced. He was the same old Mat to me, but with Nate he was standoffish.

It seemed like he didn't approve, but what could I do? Mat never made the jump to be with me, and we were on two completely different wavelengths. We wanted different things. And Nate made me happy.

In March of my junior year in college Nate proposed. We had been together for a year and a half and I really did love him. I invited Mat to our wedding shower that summer.