gone

ARGUMENT

our first argument. it wasn't the usual, why did you do this? followed by an absent response. it wasn't the let's forget this and move on.

i, for a second. thought, those thoughts that i would've dismissed if i had second guessed. but this time i didn't, i thought through the fact that we could never work out. i couldn't even with a fight, you said you were going. you were dumbfounded to think that i would say, wait.

the twinkle in your eyes, remorse for me. no. for you. a moment of realisation that you hated me too, if anything you could've brought up last night's dinner. and i didn't even care.

but a part of me wanted to shake off this coat and fling my arms into an embrace. but my other part overridden me, stuck me in my place. not even a pace forward. "so this is how it ends." bringing me back to reality, she whispered to herself, hindering that she spoke directly to me.

i guess so, i thought. my head ached but i knew it was too late. not to go running back now.

maybe this was love's curse. heading back to my drowning thoughts, yeah i knew. but maybe it was for the best. but was it so easily for me to let go, mentally, physically? after all, my comfort longed to meet your warmth each morning, after the dewy nights spent conversing with each other.

then again, maybe it was good. good enough that our faults will dissolve and that we will never have second thoughts.

maybe it was time to say goodbye.

and with that you left, never a word or a glance back again.