Borderline Girl

one

I ran down the stairs as I heard my older brother's screams, "Jakey? Why are you yelling?" I said as I entered the kitchen to where his voice was coming from.

As I spotted him, my eyes widened, "Jake?" I whispered.

"Angel go back upstairs!" He ordered, there was blood covering his face, trickling from his nose, mouth and from the various different cuts all over his face. His eyes were rimmed with dark blue and purple. There was a man standing above him, startled by my little voice, he had a hold of Jake's collar with his fist raised in the air. 

"No! I don't want to leave you!" I yelled running over to his side and hugging him, all of a sudden I was thrown off him with force. My back collided with the corner of the kitchen bench, I groaned in pain, tears pricking my eyes. I slowly crawled onto my knees, looking over-

"Angel! Get up! Time for your appointment," I heard my mum yell from outside my door. I groaned and sat up, putting my palm to my face, feeling the sweat that never failed to appear after a nights sleep- well, when I eventually did get to sleep. Last night it was around two am I fell asleep, which is the earliest it's been for a while. 

"Angel!"

"Yes mum, I'm up, I'm up."

I sat up and got out of bed, walking to my chest of drawers I pulled out a pair of ripped jeans and a black jumper. I threw my clothes on then put on light makeup, put my shoes on and walked down stairs. 

As I walked into the kitchen flashbacks from last nights dream come into my mind and I have to hold onto the kitchen bench to keep my balance, closing my eyes.

"Honey, you okay?" Mum asked me, noticing my state.

I nodded, reopening my eyes, seeing my mother's worried expression, "What is it?" she said.

"Just the dream I had last night don't worry about it."

"Was it about your brother again?" she asked and I nodded, sighing she raised her arms above her head, "Angel, this is the stuff you have to mention at your sessions, if you don't tell them this stuff they'll never be able to help properly." 

"I know, it just never comes up is all," I say, shrugging my shoulders.

"Well it has to come up today alright?" She said sternly and once again I nodded, knowing fully well I won't mention it, I barely even speak to my psychologist I just sit there and nod and on the occasion give her an 'mhm' or 'yeah', I don't actually feel comfortable with her even though I've been seeing Dr. Sophie for around three or so months now. But this is something I would never mention to my mum, as she would most likely dismiss it and send me anyway.

"Okay good, are you ready now? We've got ten minutes until we have to leave."

"I'm nearly ready, I just have to do my hair," I replied, playing with the ends of my wavy long auburn hair.

She looked at my hair in disgust, "That's probably a good idea, you wouldn't really want to be seen with that rat's nest of a thing on your head," she said, laughing slightly, but I could tell she wasn't joking. I couldn't help but feel a pang of hurt when she criticized my appearance, then again, I should be used to it by now. She insults me but makes it come across as a joke, half the time I can't tell the difference between her being serious and joking.

I nodded and turned around, walking down the dark blue carpeted hallway. Entering the bathroom I look at my appearance in the mirror, she was right, my hair looks like crap. I ran a brush through the matted mess, only to be disappointed by the outcome as it just ended up looking frizzy and gross, I sighed and threw it up into a ponytail. One last glance in the mirror and I decided that was good enough. 

I walked out and let mum know I was ready to go, walked out to the car, got in and waited for her.

A few minutes later we were on the road, on the way to my appointment. We sat in silence the whole way, the only sound surrounding us was the slight noise of the radio playing some song that everybody has heard before by a typical unoriginal pop artist. 

The time eventually came to get out of the car, I got out and quietly murmured to myself, "God I hate this place," rolling my eyes.

"What was that?" Mum asked frowning at me, I shook my head, telling her not to worry. 

"I'm gonna go in now," I told her. She agreed and told me she would be back later to pick me up, I shut the car door and walked up to the door. Dreading it I shut my eyes and took a deep breath, "Okay," I said, letting the breath out, "Let's do this," I said to myself as I walked through the door for what feels like the millionth time this year.