Monsters inside.

Chapter 7: I LOVE THAT WEREWOLF

Chapter 7: I LOVE THAT WEREWOLF

Sirius

"I feel dead.",
"Like the monster is gonna take over and I don't know if it's ever gonna stop.",
"Sooner or later something has to take over, or I'm gonna explode."
The words echoed through Sirius' head. The words from Remus' letters. Sirius didn't know what to think. Did Remus really feel this way? Was this what he was talking about when he thought Sirius was acting weird because of "the letters"? Did Remus really think Sirius would be acting weird, thinking any other way of Remus, just because of this? Was that the reason Remus didn't tell him? He just sent him the letters, knowing that Sirius would probably never read them. He didn't tell Sirius at Hogwarts. Why didn't he? Did he not trust Sirius? No, it couldn't be that...Sirius knew Remus trusted him. Remus did. At least that was what Sirius used to think. Now he was not so sure anymore. Sirius shook his head. He had to stop overreacting, clear his head and think about the facts. So, according to the letters, Remus feels like the werewolf is about to take over. Why would he think that? Sirius hadn't noticed anything special about Remus... but   thinking back on it, Remus had been acting weird.  Sirius might have been madly in love, not focusing on anything besides how cute Remus is and how his hair was in the morning. However, he also noticed that around the full moon, Remus was more grumpy than he used to be the same time the year before. He would also just sit, nails digging into his palms, not looking up until Sirius basically screamed at him. But..but Remus couldn't be a monster. Remus was not a monster. Sirius was sure of that. Remus was NOT a monster. Maybe Remus himself thought so, but Sirius knew otherwise. Remus was not a monster, he was a cute, chocolate loving, tea drinking, softie.He was not a monster. And Sirius was madly in love with him.

At dinner the next day Sirius was sitting, eating. It was just him, his brother, his mother and his father. The others would arrive in a couple of days. The table was in total silence until Walburga broke it.
"So Sirius, what did your little werewolf friend want?"
"Don't call him that." Sirius said.
"Sirius, dont talk to your mother like that." Orion said.
"Oh I'm sorry," Sirius said, cold. "He just talked about his summer." "I don't understand why you are friends with him. He is both a half blood and a monster."
"He is not a monster!"
"Excuse me?"
"Remus isn't a monster, mother!"
"Remus, as you call him, is a monster, a werewolf."
That's when Sirius realized. Remus wasn't a monster, but a werewolf. A werewolf he loved. A werewolf he had to help. He had to convince Remus that he wasn't a monster. Remus is Remus. A softie. A book nerd. A little cutie. A guy that folds his fucking socks. Remus isn't a monster.He is Remus. A werewolf. A Gryffindor. The bravest man Sirius has ever known. Everybody has monsters inside of them, but if anyone could fight it, it was Remus. His Remus. The love of his life, who wasn't a monster. But his mother was. And he wouldn't let her speak about Remus, HIS Remus, in that way.
"Mother, REMUS IS NOT A MONSTER!" He screamed.
"SIRIUS! HE IS A WEREWOLF! A BLOODY MONSTER!" Walburga answered. Sirius felt anger rising. "HE ISN'T A MONSTER! YEAH, HE IS A WEREWOLF, BUT I LOVE THAT WEREWOLF!" He screamed.
"GO TO YOUR ROOM SIRIUS!" Walburga answered, but right there and then Sirius decided. He wouldn't put up with her shit anymore.
"WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO IF I DONT??" He screamed back.
"I WILL JUST TELL EVERYBODY ABOUT YOUR FRIENDS LITTLE SECRET!" That's when Sirius snapped. "OH MUM, DON'T YOU DARE. BECAUSE THEN YOU HAVE TO EXPLAIN HOW YOUR SON, ISN'T ONLY GAY, BUT IS ALSO IN LOVE WITH A MALE WEREWOLF!"
Walburga gasped and Sirius ran out of the room. He breathed heavily. He had to get out of there.

Remus

Christmas without Sirius didn't feel like Christmas.It felt weird, not having Sirius there. It was lonely. Remus liked being alone, but he didn't like being lonely. And now he was both. He missed Siri. So, so, so, so, so much. He got two letters from James. One from Peter. None from Sirius. It wasn't a surprise really. He knew he wouldn't send anything. His mother probably wouldn't even let him out of her sight for a second. So here he was, without any of his loved ones. Without the love of his life on Christmas, he just read books, thought about Sirius, read some more books, talked to Mcgonagall, thought about Sirius, ate, thought about Sirius, thought some more about Sirius, read, thought even more about Sirius, wrote to James, thought about Sirius, and opened his presents. And so it went on and on and on until late on Christmas day. An owl came to the window, but Remus was sitting there, trying to read, but mostly thinking about Sirius, his long beautiful hair, his eyes, his smile and how he always took care of Remus after the full moon. Then the owl knocked on the window. Remus opened it and the owl flew in. Remus saw that he carried a small packet and took it from him. There was a note on it.

Hi Remmie,

Merry Christmas, I'm sorry I can't be there with you. I'm sorry we couldn't keep up with our tradition. But I couldn't not give you a gift. So here you go. Have a good break. You are not a monster Re, don't forget that.

I miss you,
Sirius

Remus smiled to himself and opened the gift. Two books and chocolate. Sirius knew him too well. He smiled as he slowly unwrapped the chocolate and took a bite. He was just about to check out the books when he looked at the letter. It was so familiar. The way it was written. Hey, nickname, the text, I miss you, and a name. And then the words " You are not a monster Re, don't forget that.". Sirius knew. Sirius fucking knew. He had read the letters. No. No. No. No. No. No. Fuck no. What was Remus suppose to do?