"Hey Bren?" there was a pause "yes?" he asked "why are your never parents home?" he smiled at me "oh! it's because they're both doctors." he said matter of factly. i sat on his couch and nodded at his response. He sat next to me and handed me a glass of water. "So i guess you do a lot around the house?" he nodded and smiled "i also do thing that are a little illegal." he spoke and pulled out what looked to be a cigarette but i knew it wasn't. He lit it and took a deep breathe. "Want?" i declined and let him finish the 'cigarette'.
"So...Dallon's going away to college, do you have any plans...like that?"i asked i wanted Brendon to go to college but i also i didn't want to be alone for so long. "No i don't want to go to college." and the conversation ended there.
I felt sick maybe i needed to take my pills. I got up and started to walk to the bathroom but i knew i wasn't going to make it so i got to the trashcan in the kitchen. I wiped the rest of my face in the sink a returned to Brendon.
"Are you feeling okay? Do you want to go back to the hospital?" Brendon asked a ton of questions but unfortunately i asked one against my own will. "Do-do you think i'm ugly?" he paused to realize what i said and then shouted
"oh my god, of course not! why would you think that? you are so handsome and beautiful how could you even ask me that question." i blushed "b-but i'm covered in red splotches and marks, i have bruises from space and beyond, and i don't have any hair. I can't even hold down a meal. I'm ugly and gross." i started crying
"Ryan...Ryan if looks could kill..." he calmed his speaking. "if looks could kill?" i repeated "then i'd be dead" he spoke getting closer to me, our eyes shut and our lips meet. It was a loving, passionate kiss...before we broke apart and we became very mad at ourselves.
"I-i" i spoke. I began to panic and i ran out the door without any of my stuff, like my shoes and medication. I reached the hospital and locked myself in my rooms bathroom and screamed at myself in the mirror "YOU'RE SO FUCKING SELFISH WHY DO YOU HAVE TO RUIN EVERYTHING! THEY WERE FINE, THEN YOU FUCKING DECIDED TO KISs his soft, and plump lips..." i punched the wall and put my head in my bleeding hand and sobbed quietly
"what am i going to do?"
YOU ARE READING
If Looks Could Kill, I'd Be Dead.
Fanfiction" if looks could kill..." "If looks could kill?" " then i would be dead, Ryan" Ryan has cancer and Bren is trying to help him get through it but it keeps getting worse no matter how hard they try. Brendon x cancer Ryan no art is mine its all by way...