I never thought that one day I'll also pray to live like everyone else. In my whole life I've lived like a living corpse. Though I was breathing but I wasn't alive. All I used to think, "When will my time end?" But now that thought has changed. Now...
Sarah....Do you remember the time we went to the country side for the school field trip?
That trip was the greatest time of my life.
I had so much fun with you guys and those became a part of my wonderful memories.
It was one of those times when I was like my old self again;
Like the time of my childhood; the time when I used to laugh holding my father's hand;
The time when I used to smile even though my mom scolded me for being too much loud;
The time when I used to go to fishing with my dad and play all day long in the river instead;
The time when I used to run home as soon as the school end just to see my mother's caring smile as she opened the door and say, "Oh Richard...you're back."
Back then I lived my to the fullest and that was my true self.
Then one day everything changed and things never went to the way how it used to be.
Then my colorless world began to form and these memories and feelings were locked away and slowly I had forgotten them.
I only remembered that certain time....... that certain incident which lead me to be the way I am now.
It was that horrible nightmare which shattered my world of happiness and turned into a broken one.
But you are the one who made me remember those times...those wonderful times of my life.
At that field trip we lost our path in the forest while playing hide and seek.
Do you still remember that?
It was becoming dark and we were still wondering around in the deep woods.
You became so afraid that you grabbed my hand tightly.
At first I was surprised to see you become afraid because it was getting dark.
When we were little you used to be so brave and act almighty.
Back when we were little... you were the bravest girl of all...even I wasn't as near brave as you.
What happened?
Did that incident stole something from you too?
I always hoped that, my nightmare would only affect me and not the others.
It was my fate and I accepted that.
And when I heard your voice on first day, the first day you transferred to our school; I could recognize you just by hearing your voice.
I knew that you were that girl from back then.
I really hoped that you wouldn't see me.
I was afraid that my face would remind you of that time.
I didn't want you to go through that pain of feeling guilt again.
It was a relief that you didn't recognize me.
And I was happy to the fact that only I remember our past together.
Even though I forgot my happy memories I never forgot you....cause you were always so different.
Even then and even now ....you are always different from others.
Besides....how can anyone ever forget their first love.......
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