I wrote this poem February 2017. It is sometimes hard for others to understand the need to forgive an abuser, but this women felt she wanted to, but struggled with it.
He stole my childhood away from me,
the things I saw, I can't un see.
The events replay always in my mind,
the day he touched me was a contract signed.
To send my mind to a far off place,
to detach myself from more disgrace.
I question the motive of men I see,
what is it that they want from me?
My depression grows into an angry seed,
an agonizing choking weed.
The years go by, justice done,
but I feel inside I haven't won.
On the surface I talk and laugh,
to hide my depressing other half.
To show others, I can forgive,
so a guilt free life he can live.
Now I find out he is dying,
the truth comes out, I am lying.
The hurt and anger haven't passed,
I wonder how long this pain will last?
I love him, but I hate him too,
I cried for days, when I knew.
How can God take our time away?
There's so much that I have to say.
I want to put his mind at ease,
"Lord", help me to forgive him please.
I want to pull out the roots of hate,
before he dies, and it's too late.
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If Only Love
PoetryI wrote this poem in 1987 during the time of the Ethiopian famine. Last year I changed a couple lines, and this is my updated version. When I first wrote this poem I was only 18 years old and hadn't had children yet. Now after nursing 7 children, I...
