She was hearing their voices under hypnosis, but what caught her attention, what made her jerked awake, what made her heart jumped to her throat and strangled her to consciousness, were the words 'She's three months pregnant' and Tanzeel knew the doctor is referring to none other than her.
She thought she had seen it all, all the bitter life has to offer, all the trails and soul ending phases-but this, it has surpassed every other thing she had felt in the past. This is something worth being disowned by her parents, by her siblings, the society and even herself.
How would she look into Maa's eyes and tell her she was three months pregnant? What would Baa say to her? Are they going to do the only thing they've never thought of doing upon her? To beat her? Is Maa going to curse her because she had tarnished their reputation and disappointed them to the extent they had never imagine?
Abdul would never thought his Tanzee would have an affair with someone that she would even get pregnant. Abdul wouldn't be able to look into her eyes because she wasn't the Tanzee he knew anymore, but he would make sure to stay by her side.
Deeni would cry together with her, or even hug her so Baa and Maa would beat them together. But is she worth being the big sister Deeni would look up to? She hasn't even taken care of herself not to talk of taking care of her sister. She felt tears pooling the brink of her eyes because she began to feel disgusted at herself.
Abdul, Mu'ammar and Deeni looked at Dr. Mubina mouth agape, they weren't able to utter a single word. Yes they knew she was married, but they've never imagined them having an affair that would lead to pregnancy. Wasn't she depressed and blind? She doesn't even know that she was married in the first place!
Deeni slowly walked towards Abdul and hugged him, happy that she was finally going to have a niece or nephew! They need to be home now, Maa should know about this, and Baa would make sure he fulfilled the promise he made to Mu'ammar because of this. She wouldn't deny her child his paternal right, right?
They motioned for Mu'ammar with their hands that they would be home, and he could only nod his head-because the information was so hard for him to digest. He couldn't believe Tanzeel has their child growing in her, would it be a he or she? If it's a she, would she look exactly like him or her mother? Ya Allah, he couldn't wait for Tanzeel to know she's his wife, he'd make sure he pampered her with all the love and care she deserves in the world.
Dr. Mubina smiled and watched as Mu'ammar knelt to his knees and offered the sujudus shukur. She left the room to them and close the door behind her. True love had always amazed her, she loves seeing people in love for the sake of Allah. And the happiness she saw on Mu'amma's face was enough evidence to show that what he has for Tanzeel was a true and forever love.
Tanzeel stiffed her body so they couldn't notice that she heard what the doctor said, but deep within; she wished she could be a mermaid that would erase all the things they heard the last five minutes completely away from their memories. She doesn't heard the sniffs of Deeni's cry, and she was sure Abdul had dragged her out so she couldn't distort her sleep.
Tanzeel is sure within the next 15mins Maa would rush to the hospital with tears drenching her face, she would look for the doctor and inquire of an assurance. And Baa would probably have his hand placed on her shoulder to console her wailing soul.
She felt as the tears she had been blocking with her eyelids burst out forcefully like a storm invading a household. She let her eyes open and sat upright, supporting her back with the bed head. She placed her hand on her flat tummy and let her soul feel, she wants to feel if there's something in this flat tummy of hers that doesn't made itself prominent when she was alone so she could get rid of it secretly. She felt nothing.
"I can't believe this is happening to me!" She wailed and broke into tears, hugging her knees and placing her head between her thighs.
Mu'ammar was watching her reaction, and he felt bad for letting her feel disgusted of herself because she was having her first child, instead of her to be happy. This was something she had to spend her entire day smiling and happy about, but this being hidden from her; she's here mourning because she was blessed to be a mother.
He felt a lone of tear rolled down his cheeks, and he doesn't stopped them. Mu'ammar walked towards the bed and sat down, she looked up from her mourning position, not having the idea there was someone in the room. She saw the tears in his eyes and wanted to speak when he pulled down her brought up legs and hugged her tightly.
She needed this, she needed someone to hug her and let her know she would be okay, that she's not the only one in this. She hugged him back even more tightly and let her eyes pour the downfall of her pain. They stood there for what seemed like forever before Mu'ammar reluctantly broke their hug and used his hands and cleared off her tears.
"It has already been destined, you crying over this wouldn't change a word out of what was written. Pray, Tanzeel, we've got this." His voice was low and soothing, and she found her eyes staring deeply into his that she almost got lost.
"Leave." Was all she could utter, her voice drained and not able to sound as audible as the normal Tanzeel would.
"I can't leave you in this situation, Tanzee. We've got this together, 90% of this is my fault, so we have to face it together." It kills him, it kills him not to tell her that she was his wife and what they did was never a sin. And this child, is Allah's rahma upon them. He dies to tell her these words, but he promised her Maa that he wouldn't tell her the truth with his lips.
She looked at him, this time; she looked murderous. "Abdul isn't here because he went to deal with his mental health and I'm sure he would be back. Whoever did this to me would face something terrible from him. Deeni would slap and rant curses on you because you've spoiled her sister's life. Maa, Maa would never forgive you, you were her cousin that supposed to protect me at all cost, but you ended up betraying her trust. Baa would make sure you go to jail and no one would ever be able to bail you out. So, Ammar, leave before they come and force the truth out of my mouth, and you'll have to face the wrath of an oppressed family. Just leave."
He peeled off her hands from her laps and entwined them with his, feeling as heaviness fills his heart from every drip of her tears. "I can't leave you like this, not when you have my child growing in you. Tanzeel, we've got this together."
She yanked off her hands from his hold and cleared away her tears, but that didn't stopped them from gushing out in a rush. "It's because I have your child in me that I want you to leave, Ammar! I want you to leave because I can't stand my child's father-event though out of wedlock-to be humiliated by my brother! I can't stand my child's father being insulted and slapped hard by my sister! I would never forgive myself if Maa curse and insult you in front of me. And what's worst? If you stay here, our child wouldn't be able to set his eyes on his father forever if Baa makes a mien here! Trust me, it would never be easy to us! Not for me, for our child; please leave Ammar."
She broke into tears and took a hold of his hand, placing it to her chest and she cried her eyes out. She doesn't know what she feels towards her child nor his father. Life has turned its back to her, and she couldn't help but feel hopeless and worthless.
He engulfed her into a hug and began drawing soothing circles on her back. Tanzeel cried into his arms until she felt like there was nothing more to cry out. But she knew today marks the beginning of the most bitter phase of her life.
"Do you love me?" He didn't know why, but seeing her like this makes him crave for what her answer would be like he has never craved for anything in the world.
"Yes, I do. I love you Mu'ammar Ibrahim Mahmoud, more than my words could ever tell."
May Allah SWT guide and protect us. May we be able to resist the temptation of this dunya. May Allah SWT remove the love we have for it and replace it with love and yearn for the aakhira! Surely it is an everlasting place. May Allah SWT reward our parents abundantly,in this dunya and in the akhiri for everything they have done for us. May we make the most of this ramadan and may all our du'as that are Khair be accepted. Amin🤲🏼❤️
Xx❤️
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TANZEEL
Romance She was not an ordinary lady. Even the texture of her hair was alluring, she has perfectly arched brows and long eyelashes that rest beautifully on her cheekbones. Her deep hazel orbs, they sent shivers down the spine of people. Her subtle skin ca...
