Why are you not here?
Laying next to me.
I want you but your not here
You swore you'd stay with me
You'd never leave me alone
Or make me feel unworthy of your sweet kiss
But every time I feel your lips
I feel the small creases like my lips are melting into them
Falling into the small crevices and the only thing I can do is speak sotto voce; begging you to help me out of this abyss of loneliness.
I need you.
Next to me
Under me
Beside me
Ontop of me
Inside of me
Now.
I've never yearned your kiss
Your touch
Your stroke
Your voice
Your warmth
Your disagreements
Your annoyances
The love we make
More than.... More than right now.
~{Taylor}
Jacob
I poured a small cup of lemonade and sipped it, letting the cold liquid hydrate my dry taste buds. I haven't eaten anything for two days now. No matter what I do to starve myself, I still gain weight. I've been throwing up constantly. I have no clue what's going in. The morning sickness gets worse and worse everyday. Maybe i'm just home sick. Maybe I hate seeing Justin everyday, sleeping in the same room and keeping a smile like what he did didn't happen. Didn't happen to me. He didn't take advantage of me. He didn't rape me. I made it up.... Atleast that's what I keep telling myself. Every time I pull my pants down to pee or to change or take a shower, i'm reminded of when he was inside of me. When I groaned out in pain and pleasure. His raw member inside of me, stroking slowly like he actually cared about me... But that wasn't possible. If he did, I wouldn't have been in the predicament I was in. I looked behind me and saw three more people walk in. Daniel instantly ran to them and hugged them, smiling hard. I sighed and walked upstairs, going into the room and past Justin into the bathroom. I stood infront of the toilet and put my plastic cup on the sink, kneeling down and throwing up. I cried silently as I threw up absolutely nothing but liquid. That's the only thing in my system I could possibly have to throw up. I rubbed my stomach as a pain shot through my back. I screeched out and held onto the sides of the toilet seat to keep from falling as I stopped throwing up. The bathroom door opened and Justin walked in. I looked up at him and wiped my face.
"W-what do you w-" he cut me off by picking me up and sitting me on the counter of the sink and closing the bathroom door. I kicked to get out of his grasp but he put his hands on my thighs and told me to stop moving. I closed my eyes. Not this again. Please not this again. I felt him lift my shirt and I instantly moved his hand and pulled it back down. He sighed and moved it back up so my chest was showing but the shirt was still around my shoulders. He rubbed my stomach and bit his lip and shook his head.
"What are you doing?" I asked. He looked up at me and moved his face towards mine.
"Your pregnant." He told me. I gasped and slapped his hand away from me.
"I don't know who the hell you think I am but i'm not a fucking retard! That's impossible!" I shouted. He put his hand behind my neck and looked straight into my eyes.
"It's possible.... Your pregnant."
