Our Chaotic Family

Chapter 7: Jung Hoseok

The alarm went off in the master bedroom. Hoseok and Yoongi sat up immediately. Haeun however, slowly moved to sit up. Today was the day that they had the 16 weeks check-up. They were going to find out if Peanut was a boy or a girl. The three got out of bed and hopped into the shower. Haeun was a bit more lethargic than usual, but she'd also had trouble sleeping the night before. 

"Something doesn't feel right," Haeun whispered as they sat in the waiting room.

"What do you mean, sweetheart?" Hobi asked running his fingers through her hair. 

"I don't know," she responded, "It just doesn't feel right." 

The three of them made their way to the examination room, the nurse asked Haeun a couple questions and left. Hoseok noticed that she seemed nervous. She was biting her lips and kicking her legs. Before he could ask her about it, the doctor came in. 

"Good morning, Mrs. Min. How's everything going?" Dr. Ahn said with a smile as he pulled up a chair next to her. 

"It's okay. I'm nervous." Haeun responded politely. The doctor nodded and reassured the mother-to-be that it was normal to feel nervous and possibly even scared. Dr. Ahn lifted Haeun's shirt and rubbed the petroleum jelly on her tummy before placing the ultrasound probe to her belly. He pointed out that the fetus was a boy before his eyebrows furrowed. He moved around the heartbeat monitor. 

Yoongi and Hoseok looked at the doctor and felt their hearts sinking. He couldn't find the heartbeat. They looked back at Haeun who had her eyes closed and her lips pressed together tightly. 

"I... I'm sorry... but he doesn't have a heartbeat..." The doctor spoke softly into the silent room, "The chances of this were less than one percent... I'll leave you three alone for a bit... I will be back to discuss your options, Mrs. Min." The doctor closed the door and Haeun stared out the window that was letting in the soft midmorning light. 

"Baby... I'm so sorry..." Hoseok said softly. He reached out to touch her but she pushed his hand away. 

"I knew something was wrong," She whispered, "I could feel it in here." She pointed to her heart. 

"Sweetheart, there's nothing we could have done. It's not our fault." Yoongi said, wanting to tell her that she didn't need to blame herself. 

"No it's not your fault it's mine. I... I must have done something. Drank too much caffeine. Drank too much alcohol before we knew. I had to have done something because the baby that I was carrying isn't alive anymore." Her voice was wavering.

Hoseok couldn't remember what happened after that. Haeun had to get surgery to remove the baby from her body. The doctors tried to give her a medication that would induce labor but it didn't work. She'd spent the last month that she'd been home recovering in the nursery that had been mostly set up. She slept on the plush rug and sometimes when you walked by the room you could see her mindlessly playing with the stuffed animals and toys that were bought for the baby. 

Hoseok and Yoongi weren't any better off. Most days Yoongi didn't get out of bed. Hobi wasn't sure what he was supposed to do. He was hurting just as much but knew that someone in the house had to be strong. Their phones had been ringing off the hook for the past month. Their friends wanted to know what the sex of the baby was. Hoseok simply responded that it was a boy and left it at that. 

Hoseok currently stood absentmindedly staring out the kitchen window while making lunch. It wasn't likely it would get eaten by anyone, but at least it gave him something to do. Something to get his mind of the fact that his baby boy was no longer around. The sound of dragging footsteps pulled Hobi's attention back to reality as his husband staggered into the kitchen. He opened the fridge and pulled a bottle of water out. 

"I'm sorry," Yoongi grumbled, "I should be helping you. Helping Haeun. I know you're hurt too." 

Hoseok nodded with a shaky breath as tears fell down his face. Yoongi wrapped him in a warm embrace and the two of them jumped when there was a knock on the door. The two of them went to answer it together. 

"We're here to see the pretty baby bu-" All of their friends cut off when they saw Yoongi and Hoseok. 

"What's wrong?" Jungkook said softly, holding Taehyung's hand tighter. Tae, who was in little space nodded, he wanted to know why his hyung's looked sad. Hoseok and Yoongi let them all inside and sat them down on the couch. 

"Last month..." Yoongi sighed out, "When we went to see if Peanut was a boy or a girl... We found out that he didn't have a heartbeat anymore." A sharp intake of breath was shared amongst the group. 

Taehyung got up and ran down the hall. Everyone else ran after him. He came to a stop in the doorway of the nursery. Haeun looked up to see everyone standing there. She tried to offer a smile but couldn't. For the first time, since she heard the news, Haeun started to cry. Why couldn't she have a baby like Luna? Why couldn't they have a family like Jin and Namjoon?

"Haeunie!" Taehyung yelled and ran over to her, hugging her tightly, "Don't cry! Taetae wubs chu so so so so so much!" Haeun buried her face in the neck of her age regressed friend. Before she knew it Luna had fallen upon the hug. So had Jin and Namjoon. Jungkook, Yoongi, Hoseok, and Jimin. They were all crying together. 

The moment was interrupted by a cry and Haeun was the first one to perk up to the sound. It was Hanuel. Luna grabbed her friend's hand and they followed the sound until they found the year and a half old sitting on the ground crying. Probably having fallen down from tottling around. Luna nodded to her letting her friend pick the baby up and soothe her. 

"Don't let this stop you from trying again," Namjoon whispered to Hoseok as they all watched Haeun comfort and then change the baby.