There Will Be Blood

11. War of the Roses

Maddie's POV

I looked up at the ceiling of my dorm room and tried to count sheep but my brain wouldn't shut down.

It was Monday night, three days after I last saw Justin and I was still milling over every detail in my head.

Why is it that every single time I try to be good, really good, it always blows up in my face? I had made an effort to keep away from Justin in my thoughts all of last week. I couldn't really control what I dreamed about but that was a different story. I had tried to keep my thoughts pure of his devilish looks but he found me.

I didn't know if it was purposeful or not but Justin didn't seem as shocked to see me as I was to see him. He kind of acted the same way he did at the fountain. Like everything was planned and he was trying to have an end goal with me. He made that known when he slipped me his business card and basically recruited me to join his harem but it was all just a game to him.

Maybe it was for me as well but somewhere deep in my blood, I knew that this attraction I had for Justin was more than just physical. Of course, with a man like that, there was no changing him and it wasn't my job to try. If he just wanted sex then I wasn't going to deny him, That's what I would love to say but I wasn't some slut who slept with a man she just met last week.

Besides, Justin wasn't worth it.

I wasn't looking for a relationship per se but that was better than a roll in the hay one time before getting dumped on my ass. Even as I was saying it, I could feel my mental walls crumbling. I was walking a very thin line that was a dangerous one. I had to make sure to stay away from Justin because he could trap me, let me fall into his web and I couldn't afford that.

If I took his game seriously, I could end up getting really hurt.

I didn't want to sound like some weak, hormonal girl who didn't know that she was getting played but Justin was a hard catch to deny. I could even see that. He was majestic in his movements, sexual in everything he did. His walk, his speech, his hair, his fingers, his eyes. Oh God, his eyes were the killer, those things would take me down without a doubt.

His whole persona was about conquering women and making them his. I bet he had a list as long as the Great Wall but none of them would mean more to him than a quick fuck.

I rubbed my eyes and thought for a second what it must be like to live in his shoes.

What the hell kind of man was he that he had to bang a different girl every night?

I had a solid background in psychology since I wanted to be one for all my life until I realized that my money situation didn't allow me to spend six years in school. I had studied books and spent a good amount of time reading up on human brains.

From my experience or lack thereof, I would probably deter that Justin had insecurity issues just like the guys in high school. Or maybe Justin had been turned down so much in his younger years that he was trying to make up for it now. He was obviously narcissistic, egotistical and in need of constant attention.

What if someone turned the tables on him?

"That would be priceless." I laughed to myself, thinking about how taken off guard he would be.

If I was strong enough for it, I would lead him on and give in to his advances but at the very last second, flip out and switch to positions, making me the dominant one. He would probably be floored but that would only make him want me more. What I wouldn't give for that. For him to want me as I wanted him? My libido would never catch up.

I would let him play his tricks with me, thinking that he was winning but the whole time, I would have the upper hand.

"Why can't I? I could pull this off." I muttered out loud.