Dead On Arrival [Destiel]

Where Is Your Boy

Cas' Point of View:

Tears wouldn't stop falling from my eyes. My hand shook as I held Dean's phone to call Charlie. She answered at the various last second, "Sup bitch."

"Charlie-h-he's dead. Dean is dead... The love of my life is dead."

"Oh my god. Where are you? We'll be right there."

"We're at that abandoned building Dean gave you the address for. It wasn't a djinn hunt. It was a vengeful demon looking to trap Dean...."

"We'll be there as soon as possible."

I held Dean in my arms. My hands were covered in his blood. I just wished I had my grace so I could heal him. Tears wouldn't stop streaming down my face. The love of my life is dead. I needed to know where he was. Whether he was in heaven or hell. I needed to know. No matter what, I planned on bringing him back, but then I thought of Dean and Sam in heaven together, sharing the same heaven. There was a part of me that felt like maybe it wasn't Dean's heaven unless I was there with him.

I cried and mourned until they got here. I stroked Dean's face, my thumb running over his lips as a tear fell from my cheek onto his. I whispered, "I love you, Dean Winchester. I've loved you for four years. I knew one day I wanted to be with you. I think what's the worst part about all of this is that I didn't get to marry you."

I smiled a little and sniffled as I pulled the little black box out of a pocket inside of my trenchcoat. I held it between my fingers, "I bought this the day after I told you I loved you. I was definitely going to wait to ask, but by the looks of it, I don't think I ever will now. I should've known with our luck that this wouldn't last very long. Life, love, just everything. It all ends at some point in some place. I will still remember your eyes, as green as could be. How they would light up when you talked about something you loved, and how they'd fade when you were upset. And now the only thing I have is knowing you loved me and that I will always love you too."

I heard Charlie's voice, "Cas!"

I quickly shoved the ring box back into my pocket. She ran to me and hugged me as we both cried together. Everything from the minute Dean died to now had been in slow motion because it's still so surreal. Kevin slowly walked into the room and fell to his knees in front of Dean. He whispered over and over, "Dean?....Dean?......Dean..?"

He started crying too and buried his face in his palms. Eventually Charlie said, "We have to go, guys."

The ride home was silent. No music, nothing, except the sound of the engine running. I sat in the back seat of the impala, holding Dean in my arms. He was cold as ice and it was so different from his warm gentle touch. Charlie drove the car and Kevin followed behind us in his car. I never took my eyes off of Dean. I stared at every inch of his lifeless body and remembered how he would function and move and talk. The lump in my throat wouldn't go away. A fatal flaw of the human body.

Charlie constantly looked back, to make sure we were okay I assumed. I don't think I was okay. I constantly felt a tear at the corner of my eye, threatening to fall. It hurt when I breathed in deeply. I whispered, "Why do these things always happen to us?"

Charlie whispered back, trying not to cry, "I'd like to say its life, which is partially true, but it's mostly just the life of a hunter, I suppose. But I'm so sorry, Cas..."

I shook my head, "No need to feel sorry for me."

She nodded and returned her focus to the road. I knew she was going to say something back, but she changed her mind. Soon, we finally arrived and pulled into the bunker. Charlie and Kevin offered to help bury Dean, but I told them we weren't burying him just yet. I carried him inside by myself and set him on his bed. So many memories in this bed.

I told Charlie and Kevin who still stood by the door, "You two can go for now. I have some business to attend to."

They nodded and left, although I'm sure they didn't want to. I walked back down the hall to Dean's room. The vial that held my grace was in a lock box, after Dean suggested it wasn't safe around my neck on hunts. I unlocked the box and stared at the bright substance. I looked back at Dean's body. He looked so peaceful. I said, "I'm going to find out where you are. Hopefully you're in heaven with Sam."

I swallowed my grace and immediately over the angel radio, I heard word about Dean. Not long ago since he passed and he was most of the chatter. I heard a lot of people mentioning he had ended up in hell. One of the angels I trusted was Hannah. She had recently fallen, I flew to her in a matter of seconds. She was sitting in a park, watching the humans. I said, "Hello," and she was startled.

"Um hello, Castiel," she replied.

"I need to ask you a question."

She raised her eyebrow, "Does this have to do with Dean, your lover?"

"He's-uh never mind. Yes this has to do with him. Do you know where he is now? Heaven or hell?"

She looked at me confused, "You don't know?"

I shook my head, "I haven't returned to heaven yet. I needed to find out where he was first."

"Castiel, I don't know how to tell you this, but he's not in heaven."

"What do you mean? How do you know," I questioned.

"I know everyone in heaven and Dean Winchester is not one of them. He's somewhere in hell." I shook my head and immediately left her to go search hell.

With the help of my wings, I appeared in hell. Angel sigils were all over the walls. I was surprised I could even be in here. I couldn't fly when I tried to cover more grounds. Then, I realized the sigils were to temporarily take away angels' powers. The entire place resembled a prison. I started walking down the hall of prison cells. I didn't understand why none of the people saw me walking by, but I saw them and heard their screams. I assumed this is where the new souls were first put. All the cells were labeled by a name above the cell door. I started running down the line with my coat flapping behind me. I looked at each of the names. Then I finally saw his. "Dean Winchester" was engraved in a red glowing substance over the cell door.

I paused before saying anything. I stared at him. He blinked and moved as if he were alive. My eyes started welling up again. I couldn't believe it. Seeing him like this and not even twenty minutes ago, he laid lifeless in my arms.

I finally yelled, "Dean," and touched the bars to the cell. I burned my hand. It had some sort of other angel warning on them. He stared at the wall, completely oblivious. He sighed with his hands on the back of his neck, "I'm so sorry, Cas. I made a mistake. I shouldn't have done what I did. The torturing. That's why I'm here. I have wronged you. I deserve to be here."

I screamed and pleaded for him, but he couldn't hear me. I shook the bars, although they burned like hell, literally. "Dean! Don't blame it on yourself! This isn't your fault! You haven't wronged me! I love you," I screamed at him.

Demon guards saw me and grabbed ahold of me. I kicked and squirmed, trying to get away. One smiled deviously at me, "We're taking you to The King."