Mea Culpa

Chapter 30

Happy returned to the Teller Cruz household but he didn't return alone. With him were Tig and Ratboy, much to Roxy's dismay. It had been a few days but Coco's words about picking sides still rang in her head and she had been dealing with the guilt ever since.

"Hey," she said, shellshocked, as Tig greeted her with a kiss on the cheek. "What's this?"

"Just a visit," Ratboy said, giving her a half-hug. "Sorry I missed the party."

Roxy gave him a thin-lipped smile. "Well, none of you guys were really invited but, sure."

"Where's your old man?" Happy asked casually.

"He's on a run," she remarked, pointing to the calendar on the fridge with that day and the day after marked with an X. "Stopping for a brief meeting too, won't be home for a day or two."

"He totally knew," Letti said with distaste as she announced her presence with a click of her tongue.

"No Chibs?" Roxy asked suspiciously. "If this was planned I'm surprised he didn't come down too."

"He'll be here tomorrow," Rat replied with a chuckle.

"You want me to call my dad?" Letti asked, a suspicious eye on the men taking over her first ever stable and happy home.

"No," Roxy said quietly. "He's working, it'll just get in his head." They were silent as Letti nodded before grabbing a drink from the fridge and heading out of the room again. "She's not legal," Roxy said to Ratboy, "So don't even think about it."

Ratboy laughed. "I wasn't looking!"

Looking at him she rolled her eyes. "We can't put you guys up. We don't have the room."

"We're staying at the SAMDINO clubhouse," Tig told her. "We're good."

"Okay, well, it was good to see you," she shrugged.

"Come on, Rox," Happy huffed. "Hang out."

"I can't," she sighed.

"Where's Mateo?" Tig asked.

"Spending the day with his grandparents," she clicked her tongue, "Marcus and Diana."

"See?" Tig clapped his hands. "Perfect."

"Not perfect," she grumbled. "Just a few hours, okay?"

"That's more than enough," Happy said with a small smile. "Just like old times."

At first, it wasn't like old times. It was awkward and tense because Roxy refused to even try to enjoy their visit. After about an hour though she loosened up, stories about her parents from long before she was born seemed to do the trick.

"She did that?" Roxy cackled. "My mom really did that shit? Who actually toilet papers houses?"

"That's what us old assholes did when we were kids," Tig laughed. "She wasn't always big bad Gemma," Tig said nostalgically.

Roxy's laughter died a bit before shaking off the sadness. "Remember when Jax and Ope ran down those assholes who robbed Hanna's?"

"What?" Happy leaned in eagerly. "How did I never hear this?"

"You missed a lot, brother," Tig said of Happy's Nomad and Tacoma years.

"Wasn't that what got them prospecting?"

"Opie already was," Tig told her, "That earned Jax his kutte though," Tig explained. "He wasn't handed it, he really worked for that shit."

"Sometimes I forget the person he was when we were younger," she sighed. "Look at us," she scoffed, "Even me, we're all so hard now."

"We lost a lot," Tig said somberly. "That's why this shit is good for us, you left and you had your reasons but you're still our Roxy Teller."

"Stop," her voice cracked. "I was so angry when I left, there was so much shit in my head and my fucking heart, I hated everything that had to do with the Reaper."

Happy nodded. "We know."

"That why you staged this bullshit?" She asked, dabbing her eyes to keep the tears from falling.

Rat and Tig nodded.

"Well it worked," she laughed sadly.

"It was pretty clear at Mateo's party you didn't look at us like family," Tig explained. "We were the enemy."

"I know," she admitted. "It's kind of hard, juggling loyalty."

"No juggling," Happy said. "You're SAMCRO blood."

"You're really gonna try that?" She asked, becoming more defensive. "Blood doesn't make us family."

"It's a start," Tig shrugged. "Look, we need a," he was silent as Roxy interrupted forcefully.

"You need a Gemma or some poor little excuse to rally around because morale is low with the new guys?"

"No," Rat said quickly.

"We want a Teller around, we want you back. Mateo isn't Esai's, we all know that now," Tig told her. "We think it's time you come home."

"I am home," she swallowed hard. "Why are you doing this?"

"You're not meant to be with the Mayans," Happy told her. "And, I think I wanna be a dad"

Roxy laughed. "No."

"Come on," Happy grumbled.

"Hell. No. You aren't fit to be a dad, you don't want Mateo you just don't like Coco and, even though the Sons and Mayans are on good terms, you don't like them. That's a personal problem," she added sharply.  "And you're going to have to deal with it personally."

"Teo is my kid, I'm giving him a goddamn organ I think that means something."

Jumping to her feet, Roxy glared at Happy. "Where did this come from?"

"We lost a lot," he repeated Tig's words. "Piney, Ope, Bobby, Gemma, Jax," Happy became noticeably upset. "Even the ones we put down ourselves, we lost brothers. That last year, that changed shit."

"I have a life," she shook her head. "My life is here."

"In this shit ass town?" Rat scoffed. "Charming ain't much but it's better than Santo Padre."

"At least we have a Starbucks kinda close by," she rolled her eyes. "I'll think about...visiting or something. I.. I don't know."

"Come on boys," Happy said, standing up. He moved incredibly close, too close, to Roxy and kissed her cheek. "That's all I'm askin' just think about it."