His Unwanted Wife

Synopsis

Hi! First of all, I apologize that this story hasn't been progressing for years. When I wrote this story, I was 14 or 15. I was overwhelmed that a lot of readers took their time to read this story. But those times, I lack as a writer. There are topics that I Included here before that I am not aware enough to write. And when I read it, I feel disappointed because I could've write it better.

But now I'm 19, I already finished 2 more stories here, and writing those gave me courage to finish this. There are many of you who waited for this and I wanna rewrite this with care.

I lost the edited version of this for some reason when I changed devices but I'm already working on rewriting this again.

Thank you for understanding!

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Mugto ang mata habang binabaybay ko ang kahabaan ng EDSA, pagod at walang laman ang sikmura. Bitbit sa palad ang dalawang papel ng isangdaan, humihikbi na binabantayan ko na umabot ng 150 ang metro ng taxi ngunit naalala ko na kahit umabot man ng ilang milyon ang metro ko, wala paring patutunguhan ang buhay ko.

Huminto ang sasakyan sa tapat ng mga nakahilerang mga food stall na sakop ng isang parke ayon na rin sa nais ko. Hawak ang natitirang salapi sa kamay, natanaw ko ang katabi ng stall ng shawarma na siguradong pasok sa salaping pinanghahawakan ko, ang stall ng black gulaman at siomai.

Matapos makabili ay umupo ako sa isang bench sa tapat rin ng mga nakahilerang food stall. Sa dinarami rami ng pumaparito ay may ilan na ring tumabi sakin na isinawalang bahala ko na lamang. Madalas kong haplusin ang tiyan ko sa kadahilanang una, ay kaninang umaga pa ang huling pagkakataon na nalamanan ang aking tiyan at ngayon ay bilog na bilog na ang buwan, pangalawa ay inaalala ko ang buhay na nasa loob nito na siguradong magiging pundasyon ng buhay ko.

It all started with a calm ride. In the middle, it became bumpy. The screams I had are all nothing compares to the silence I've been through. No one can hear the silence, and everyone will stare at you if you screams. Between the two, what's the more painful? Is it the embarrassment you gain after everyone looked at you when you screams? Or is it the defeaning silence that you protected for years.. and suddenly, the collection of tears you had for a long time snappily explode without warning. It was a dynamite that has a great potential to cause conflict.

I still remember how my heaven-sent smile vanished into thin air after few minutes of experiencing the luck. I never thought that sacrificing my own capability to decide throughout the years will result to nothing. I just ended up being blank and void.

That's what I get for being fool. That's what I get for being silent.

I already lost one of the precious angel that I could have embracing right now. He or she is the one that got away. Still after that, why did I choose to stay? What's with him that no matter how great the pain he caused me, I still end up staying. It was irony that I can leave.. but I can't. I just simply can't.

Oh, the little thing he does to me.

He was the man I badly wanted. He was the man who makes me feel unwanted despite of being my most wanted.

All we had was confusion. That in the end of day, I reached my limit. My head was just aching thinking and hoping for something beautiful.

Can I still hope that all of my pains will turn into something beautiful?

We are just both bewildered by the commitment that tied us.

Tonight, I was willing to untie the knot. And as I throw the ring I had for years, I felt naked. I felt empty.

But I'll stop at this moment. I, myself, wanted my own being the most. I would never let him make me feel more unwanted to the point that I would crush into lifeless. To the point that I'll lose myself.