Not quite the world you know.

It's part of the job, you can't save everyone

Crowley's POV

I awoke to the sound of muffled screaming. I shot up only to see my angel flipping around in the bed. Struggling as his wings tangled around his body. I went to sit back next to him when I was hit by one of his gigantic wings. I gasped and stumbled slightly before leaning down and shaking him.

"Wake up angel." I tried to soothe him and he sobbed before waking up. He inhaled shakily and winced as he forced his wings away. He looked so exposed laying tangled in the sheets, fear covering his face. "What was all that about?"

"Nothing it was nothing." He lies, sitting up and touching the side of my face. "Did I hurt you?" I brushed his hand away and sat next to him gently.

"Come on Angel, that wasn't nothing." He didn't meet my eyes. I laid next to him and pulled him over so he was laying on my chest with his legs between mine. He inhaled deeply and nuzzled into my chest.

"I'm fine it was just a bad dream." He said even in the still-dark room I could see the frown on his face. I proper myself up just slightly so I could see him better with him still laying on me. I smiled slightly and kissed the golden curls. He sighed and his hand fisted in my shirt slightly, his heart pounding against mine. "Please just don't let me go."

"I won't, Angel, I promise." Soon I began to hear light snores come for him and I stroked through his hair. We would be fine, as always.

~**~
Dean's POV

I paced through the room a half-empty bottle of whiskey in one hand the other running through my hair. I remember the memories, they sure as hell weren't mine. I remembered looking over at Cas seeing the peaceful smile on his face, even though he hadn't wanted to go originally anyone could see he was glad that he did. The lines softened and the dark circles under his eyes lightened slightly.

"Dean?" Sam questioned from his bed. He had his laptop positioned on his knees half ready to type. "You know we'll get him back right?"  I groaned and sat on my bed.

"If that moronic angel and his demon boyfriend weren't so useless then maybe Cas would still be here." I took a long swig from the bottle barely feeling it as it seared down my throat, I wished it would fix my problem, that sadly did not happen.

"Look, they did their best, Aziraphale was obviously spread thin and the demon is well a demon, he was just looking after the angel," Sam responded setting down the computer. 

"They could have done more. I should ha-" Sam cut me off quickly.

"This wasn't your fault none of us saw this coming." Sam put his hand out and I handed him the bottle, he took a drink before handing it back. "You know very well that they are doing all they can to get him back. Aziraphale, regardless of the way he came off, loves Cas a lot, you can tell. He's not going to take this one lightly." 

"Well, nothing's getting done. He should be going up to heaven now and getting him out." I huffed. I knew I was being unfair. I just didn't care. That was my angel and I was going to be dammed if I didn't- wait, MY angel? Where did that come from? I laid back into the strange-smelling pillows and sighed. 

"You know he can't Dean, you saw what they did to him." Sam objected. Also laying back now. We stared up at the ceiling. 

"Yeah, I know." I clicked off the light next to my bed. "Go to bed Sammy, it's not like there's anything better to do." My mind raced still trying to place the emotions and memories that were not mine. I flipped to my side. Looking back on the happy memories of Cas. We'll find him, he always comes when I call. 

                                                                                  --**--

I awoke to a loud banging, and the door burst inward. I shot up my gun in hand as a bullet flew toward its target. The man screamed and ducked, just in time seeing as the bullet embedded itself into a wall inches from where the man's head now was. 

"It's me! It's me don't shoot!" A familiar voice cried from the ground. Sam jumped off of his bed and sighed before putting a hand up to me. I set the gun down and walked around the bed. Golden curls bounced as the man stood and I sighed rubbing my hand across my face.

"What the hell are you doing here?" I asked ruffly and he attempted to smooth down his jumper that was inside out, and backwards. I shook my head.

"Well we have an idea, it will either get Cas back or absolutely destroy me." He said very straight forward. "Crowley's in the car, are you coming?" He looked up at me his blue eyes searching my face. 

"We can't let you kill yourself, no matter what it means for us. Cas wouldn't like it." Sam said looking over at me. 

"Well, I'm not Cas and I don't hear anything from him," I said quickly, crossing my arms.

"It's not his decision, well it is but I am basically his father and I have decided to take the fall, I got him into this mess anyway." The angel said and I motioned at him with a smug look at Sam. He shook his head but said nothing else. Aziraphale put his hand on Sam's arm and Sam looked down slightly shocked. "It's okay, I don't mind." Sam nodded and the angel clapped his hands. "One more small thing," He muttered to himself quietly but looked back up. "Crowley doesn't know that this could have, let's say, negative effects and if he did he won't let me go, you can say anything to him."

"Isn't it a sin to lie?" I said sharply.

"This isn't lying so much as protecting an ugly truth." He said sheepishly.

"So the angel has a dark side?" Sam punched my arm and we walked out and into the old Bently. The demon scowled at me and I gave him the fakest smile possible. I continued to frown until I saw the demon reach out and take Aziraphale's hand. That's why he wasn't telling him. Sam and I made eye contact and he smiled sadly. The angle let his head fall on Crowley's shoulder, and I watched with a bit of peace as the sun rose above the trees. 

                                                                 --**--

Crowley's POV

The Bently pulled in front of the shop and I parked it quickly. Zira smiled and stepped out. The two men following. I opened the door and they walked in. Zira and I had worked out the plan near an hour ago. I had set up candles as he drew the familiar pattern on the floor. His shoulders had been shaking a bit and I had rubbed his back trying to comfort him. I noticed the state he was in as he ran a hand through his hair. With a snap of my fingers, the blue jumper was on right and his curls laid evenly on his head. He smiled before turning to the others. 

"Alright so, umm, time is going to go a bit different down here than up there. What is it, Crowley?" He squinted looking over at me.

"For every two minutes here, fifteen up there," I responded and he smiled.

"Yes that's it, so count on about six minutes. Everything will be fine I promise six minutes. I will go up, find Castiel and bring him back down." He nodded along with the plan like as he said it. "We don't have much time." He turned to me.

"Angel? Can I have a second?" He nodded and Dean didn't look up turning to his brother. I led Zira into the kitchen with a sigh. "Listen, I know you don't agree with me but just listen. If things go pear-shaped, you get out of there, I don't care what else is happening, I love you too much to leave you like that. I hate that you're going in the first place. I-" He cut me off by pressing his lips hard into mine, standing on his toes, holding on to me tightly. 

"I love you too, and I will be coming back." He said still as close to me as possible. I kissed his forehead. He stepped back and we walked slowly into the main room. "Let's get this over with." He mumbled a few words and the circle lit. He looked at me as if he was trying to remember every last thing about me. Then it hit me, he wasn't coming back. He stepped back and mouthed I love you then he was gone. The light dimmed and I hit the wall. Sam sighed and his hand was on my shoulder. I threw it off, falling to the couch looking at my watch. Six minutes come on Angel you promised. Three passed, then four, then five, as six hits I stood quickly and looked expectantly at the portal, nothing. The clock ticked. Then a blinding light. A figure broke the connection before dropping the one in his arms. He fell to his knees coughing.

"Angel!" I rushed over. He looked up and smiled slightly before coughing more. I leaned down to pick him up and he batted my hands toward the other angel. 

"Help him first I'm fine." He continued to cough still on his knees. Dean rushed over and helped me lift him, laying Cas on the couch. I turned just in time to see Airaphale hit the ground. 

Word count: 1643