Winter's Daughter

Chapter Two

Blood. Everywhere I look there is blood. I panic at the thought of it being mine, but I soon realize that I wasn't the victim here.

HYDRA had sent me all the way from Russia to a small town in Missouri. One of their ex-agents lived there.

Here's the thing about HYDRA. They don't have ex-agents. You either stay with them until you get killed, or you die trying to escape. This just happened to me one of the few that actually got away.

My mission was to eliminate the traitor and his family. Simple, right? That's an easy kill and go.

But no, not for me. In my eyes, this traitor had a name. Adrian Pavlov to be exact. He had a wife and three beautiful kids. He got a second chance. To be happy, to be free.

Well, freedom doesn't last forever.

In HYDRA's eyes, all he is, is a traitor. They wouldn't dare speak his name. That's why I refused to complete my mission. And that's why I got my memory wiped, again.

I was snapped out of my thoughts by a small whimper coming from the other room. I carefully walk over there, trying not to step in the blood of my victims.

I soon realize that the whimper came from Adrian's youngest child, Nikko. He couldn't be more than eight. As I become in his range of sight, he starts to panic. He tries to crawl away from me, but he can't. He's in too much pain.

I swiftly come to his side and kneel next to him. I start to stroke his hair in an attempt to calm him down. "Nikko, is it?" He slowly nods. "Well, Nikko, it is nice to meet you. My name is Nadiya." He just stares into my eyes with pure terror. "Why?" Is all he can manage to get out.

I tear away from his gaze, my heart breaking. This poor child is suffering because of me. His blood on my hands. I can never forgive myself for this.

I suck in a sharp breath, contemplating how I should say this. "Nikko, your fath-" I stop mid sentence to see that I waited too long.

He was gone. Just like the rest of them. Out of the many people I've killed, this was the worst by far.

I stand up and make my way to the kitchen. Surely enough, something caught my eye. A newspaper. I look at the date, and it says it's 2017.

"There's no way." I mumble to myself. Three years have gone by. Three years. How much of it do I even remember?

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Bucky's Pov

It's happening again. It's like I'm here, but not. My mind is foggy with all the memories of the past. Most have come back to me, but there is a good handful that I still don't remember. Steve has been helping me as much as he can, but he will never know the true experiences of HYDRA and what it was like.

I'm surrounded by my friends, my family. But it's almost like I'm not here. Something is missing. Someone is missing.

I just can't shake this feeling of emptiness inside of me. Back in HYDRA, my purpose was to be the Winter Soldier. Here in Shield, my purpose was to be an Avenger.

But in this moment, where all of my friends and I are sitting around a table, eating, what is my purpose?

"Bucky!" I snap my head up to see that Tony has been calling out my name.

"Oh so now you decide to listen. Maybe calling your name five times triggers your eardrums." Tony says sarcastically. "Watch it, Stark" Steve says from next to me.

"Sorry, just have a lot on my mind" I say sheepishly. "What was it that you were saying?"

Tony eyes me skeptically. "Nothing important." He then turns his attention to Steve. "Hey, Rogers, next time you decide to make my punching bags into a sandpit, you're paying."

Steve lets out a light chuckle. "Yeah, okay." With that, Tony starts to walk out of the room. "Everyone should get to bed, we all know that Banner needs his beauty sleep to not turn green." Tony says with a smirk.

Banner lets out a long sigh while Natasha just roles her eyes. We all indulge on some small talk before we all go our separate ways.

Flashback

"Sit still, Nadiya." I say as I patch up the little girls shoulder. She couldn't have been more than seven. She had just come back from another session in the torture room.

"Ah! Winter, it hurts!" She screams. "I know, little one, but if I do not get this stitched up then you will be in more pain than you are now."

And with that, she fell silent. But I could still tell that she was trying to hide her sobs from me.

"Aaand, done!" I say. When I do not get an answer back, I touch her good shoulder and spin her around so she is looking at me. What I see breaks my heart. Her eyes and cheeks were all read and puffy from crying. Her head hung low as if she was disappointed in herself.

I couldn't find the words to comfort her. What was I suppose to say? That things would get better? That she'll be free one day? That everything is okay? All of those are lies. The older she gets, the worse it will become. The chance of her being free, is impossibly slim. And all of this? All of this is not okay.

As I am contemplating on what to say, she starts to cry again. Without any hesitation, I bring her into a tight hug. At this moment, I don't care that my clothes are getting wet with the tears of a child.

"Hush, Nadiya, I'm here. You're safe with me." I tell her as I stroke her back. "As long as I am here, I won't let anything happen to you" As I said those words, she pulled away to look up to me.

"As long as I'm here, nothing will happen to you, Winter." She says as she puts her small hand on my cheek. I give her a small smile before taking her hand on my cheek into mine.

"You don't have to worry about me, Nadiya. I'll be okay as long as I know you're alive." She smiles, but it quickly fades. "Winter, can I ask you something?"

"Anything." I say. "Why don't I have parents? Do they not want me anymore? Is that why they haven't found me?" As she finishes her question, I see tears threatening to spill. She wants to be strong, but she can only be it for so long.

"Listen, kiddo. Any person that wouldn't want you is insane. You know as good as I that HYDRA is never found. I'm sure they are still looking for you." I say as I wipe a tear from her face. As I begin to pull away my hand, she quickly grabs it.

"Thank you. For everything." She whispers. My heart aches. She shouldn't be thanking me. After all, I am the one who causes most of her injuries when I am the Winter Soldier.

"You shouldn't be thanking me." I say as I tare away from her gaze. "I am the reason why you gave those scares on your body. I'm the reason you have nightmares at night. I should be the last person you thank."

"No!" She says. I look back into her big blue eyes. "What?" I ask, confused. "No!" She says louder. "Bucky. That's who you are. This is who you are right now. I'm only going to judge your actions on how you act as Bucky, not the Winter Soldier. That's a different man. Not you."

I am completely taken back by the young girls words. I am about to respond, but HYDRA agents blast through the door. They waste no time in grabbing Nadiya and I. I know better than to fight back, but Nadiya still has her fighting spirit. She starts to scream and thrash around in their arms.

"Let me go!" She screams over and over again. Once the agents get us into the hallway, I see that the are taking us in different directions. Me to get my memory wiped, and Nadiya to the torture room. That's when I allow panic to set in.

I start thrashing around, hoping to break loose from the agents' grip. "Nadiya!" I scream. "Get away from her!" The next thing I heard would haunt my dreams forever. It was Nadiya's blood curdling scream.

"No!" I scream. I start to punch the agents and break free from their grip, but I can only do so much when I feel a needle go into my neck. I slowly start to loose consciousness. As I fall to my knees, I look up to one of the agents. "I'm going to kill you." I say bitterly. "Sure you will" Is all he says before his foot makes contact with my face.

Updated 7/17/19