Brazilian Summer

Prologue

Rachel finally sat down heavily in her seat, backpack still on her lap. At least she had managed to score a window seat on this long flight now and so far, the middle one separating her from the small lady on the aisle was still empty. Fingers crossed it would stay that way, hopefully she was going to be able to at least get a bit of sleep. Luckily, she was petite and her consistent yoga practice made it easy for her to curl up and get comfortable even in the tiniest spaces.

The first short leg from London to Amsterdam had gone very quickly but the layover had been short and she'd had to rush to make it to the boarding gate on time. But she had made it after a brisk walk and a panicked sprint at the end, her smaller suitcase already securely stored in the overhead bin and the larger one hopefully being loaded into the belly of the aircraft right then. Rachel exhaled - for the first time in what felt like weeks. Time to relax and get comfortable, she wasn't going anywhere for the next twelve hours, except for maybe down the aisle to the tiny bathroom. 

The plane was filling up fast as more and more passengers were boarding and finding their allocated seats. Rachel glanced out the window at the many service cars rolling by. They looked so busy but seemed to follow some higher guidance, stacked with luggage of vacationers and travelers making their ways to God knows what corners of the world. It was a particularly grey Thursday and Rachel could hear the wind howling outside the big aircraft. Amsterdam was rainy and dark and she couldn't wait for take off - to finally get away and put some distance between her and her hometown London. Between her and all the heartache and the problems and everything that seemed so insuperable. And especially, between her and Clive. 

The last weeks had been a fog of tears, endless phone calls with her mom and lots of hiding away in her room. Again, she became aware of the big weight that was sitting heavily on her chest making it hard to breathe. A deep sorrow that seemed to pull her heart down further into an ocean of despair no matter how much she fought to get back to the surface. Why was it that something that was so crystal clear and easy to grasp with logic was so difficult for the heart to understand? She had had to end it. There was simply no other way. What Clive did to her was far beyond what she could have forgiven. Clearly, there was no chance of a future together. Rachel would have to move on, build a life without him. It was time. And this time away from all that she knew and was used to was the best thing to help her make that clean cut.

Just five weeks ago her life had been so neatly in order when she'd come home from work at a well-established PR agency to find that something didn't feel quite right about their apartment - some sixth sense told her that something was off. She walked in but nothing seemed different. The flowers on the coffee table in the living room she had gotten at the farmers market on the weekend were still gorgeous. There were a few dishes sitting in the sink from the dinner her and Clive had enjoyed the previous night but that was nothing that bothered her. Clive hadn't even left as much as a light on. Shaking her head and smiling at her seemingly overactive imagination she walked into the bedroom to change out of her skinny jeans and into some more comfortable sweatpants, planning to make herself comfortable on the couch and browse through the various food delivery apps on her phone so she could order in before Clive came back from the gym. He always worked out in the evening whilst Rachel preferred the early mornings when the day was still fresh and moving the body was just what you need to prepare you for anything you might encounter. And right there wiggling out of her pants she noticed that Clive had left his phone lying on the bed when he had stopped by, dropping off his work stuff and quickly grabbing his gym bag. 

Rachel only meant to put the iPhone 8 on Clive's bedside table when the screen lit up. There were several text messages but one name that caught her eye instantly: Sophie. Rachel couldn't remember Clive ever mentioning a friend with that name. He had a few girl friends but Rachel knew all of them, in fact, they had become her friends over the years also. What was even more disturbing was the message itself: it said 'On my way, babe' with a little red heart emoji. Clive wasn't the type to exchange flirty messages with his female friends. When he was stressed at work or busy he wasn't even particularly loving when texting her. Faster than her brain could even make the connection Rachel's fingers unlocked the phone and opened up the message. She briefly read through the chat history and in that very instant her entire world fell apart.