feel

6

CARTER SAT watching, bored, the remaining smell of smoke from her lunch break sticking to her clothing. The gymnasium was filled with the squeaks of tennis shoes and the cheers of onlookers.

Her fingers twitched in the absence of the familiarity of a cigarette and her head was alive in memories as her gaze stayed unfocused and hooked on the wall opposite her.

"What are you doing, Car? Why are you here?"

And then a voice quieted the voices and the ringing and the pain with one simple word.

"Duchess!"

It was like a switch had been flipped. A smile broke across her face before she even saw him, her mind focused on him and the voices stopped ringing in terrible memories around her head. A sudden and certain warmth found its home in her stomach. She stopped biting at her cuticles and moved her gaze forward to capture that cutting topaz she wanted to get used to.

Billy had just jogged over to the bleachers from the locker room, chest distractingly bare and shorts rolled up to leave as little to the imagination as legally possible.

"Hargrove!" She called back with every attempt to sound sarcastically enthusiastic.

Billy finally reached her, propping himself on the lowest bleacher and staring up at her with that cutting topaz.

"I didn't know you go to this shit-hole of a school!" He called up at her, tongue running lightly over his lip.

Carter could feel the angry glares of the other girls around her - girls who had come pampered for the very experience Carter was taunting easily in front of them - burning holes in her back.

She didn't like that heat. But the warmth she felt from Billy's gaze made facing the heat worth it.

"You're the new guy everyone's taking about, then?" Carter asked, leaning forwards so her face was closer to his.

Billy took a step back and bowed dramatically.

"The one and same, duchess," he proclaimed.

For however many eyes stared at him, Billy only wanted hers. He only wanted those two beautiful brown eyes guarded and soft piercing ice through his searing soul.

"Your reputation precedes you," she called back.

A smirk lit up Billy's face as Carter began to climb down the bleachers.

"Oh yeah?" He taunted, chin jutting out and tongue running across his bottom lip, "what do they say about me?"

He raised a hand for Carter to take to help her drop down to the gym floor from the bottom bleacher. She saw it but did not take it, opting to jump down herself.

"They say," Carter said, turning to stand tauntingly near Billy, "that you're a serial womanizer with a good ass who can give a girl a good time."

Their chests were nearly touching and Billy could feel the cold radiating off of her. He could see it as it disappeared in her eyes. He wondered for a moment if its melting was because of him.

"And what do you think?" Billy winked as he whispered lowly, moving so they were chest-to chest.

"I think," she whispered back, biting her lip in a way she knew would turn Billy on, "that your ego is bigger than whatever you've got going on in your pants."

With that, Carter lightly pushed him away, a lop-sided smile on her lips. Billy scoffed, eyes lit up in mock hurt and amusement.

"Wanna find out?" He called back at the retreating figure.

The only response was a laughter he could feel himself slowly growing used to.

*****

Carter trudged her way to the front office of the school, her face scrunched in annoyance.

It wasn't terribly uncommon for her name to be called over the intercom for some reason of another, But she hadn't been expecting her name to ring across the loudspeaker today. She wasn't in the mood for another suspension or 'private talk' with the principal about how many strikes she had left before expulsion. What was she on now - strike twenty? Inning fifteen? She had lost count.

But regardless, she pulled open the door to the office without knocking and took the two steps it took to get to the reception desk.

"You rang, again?" Carter shoved her hands in her pockets.

The receptionist looked up at Carter and spoke with a soft sugary tone Carter grimaced at the innocence of.

"Got a call for you, sweetie."

Carter took the phone from the receiver on the wall.

"Hello?"

The only sound on the other end was heavy and inconsistent breathing.

"Uh, hello?" Carter tried again.

She was just about to place the phone back on the receiver and excuse herself for a cigarette break before Hopper's alarmingly rushed voice echoed in her ears.

"Carter!" He called, sounding breathless, "I need you to do something for me."

Carter rolled her eyes. Over the last couple of years she'd broken into labs, trespassed on government property, stolen weapons and pain medication and provided housing for Mike and his gang on Hopper's behalf. She wasn't excited to find out what she had to do this time. But she was forever grateful to Hopper, and would try her hardest to do the best she could for him. He was the one person in the world she'd gladly submit to.

"What's up, Hop?"

"I need you to go to my grandfather's old cabin. I know you know where it is-" He began, voice so hurried Carter could hardly make out the words.

"Why on-"

"Celeste I don't have time. I need you to do as I say!" He all but roared over the phone.

Carter jumped in shock. Hopper had made a promise to not raise his voice at her for fear of reminding Carter of her mother. It was a promise he mostly upheld.

"I'm sorry. I'm busy and - and I'm so, so sorry I didn't tell you about this earlier, but my daughter's in the cabin and I need you to make sure she's okay. Carter - you understand? I need you to take care of my daughter."

A small ringing echoed in Carter's ears.

"I keep telling you, Car."

"D-daughter? You have a - a daughter?"

"You lose yourself too often and you won't be able to come back."

Hopper sighed over the phone in a desperate but frustrated way.

"Look. I'm sorry. It's a long story and I don't have time. I'm investigating a pumpkin patch-"

"A fucking pumpkin patch?" Carter shot back, anger in her voice.

Not only did Hopper have a daughter she had known nothing about, but he was abandoning her for a pumpkin patch.

"Carter, there are things going on you have no idea about," Hopper growled lowly, "and to keep you and my daughter safe, you do as I say."