Same Drugs (Billy Hargrove)

a weak facade

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(Rob Lowe as  Sam McAllister)

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After an hour, Max's mom pulled into the driveway. Max ran out of her room to greet her but ran back after a minute. "My mom wants me to go to the grocery store with her," She said, and I nodded, "Go ahead, I'll tell Steve to come and get me." She smiled and thanked me for coming over, and I told her it was no problem at all. I was glad to prevent Billy from ripping at her. She seemed like she took a lot of verbal abuse from him, and it bothered me slightly. Once she tied her shoes and left the house, I stood up and picked up my jacket, preparing to go find a phone to call Steve from. Before I could leave Max's room, however, Billy was in her doorway once again. 

"Jamie," He said, and I began to feel a blush creeping up my cheeks again. "Yeah?" I asked, waiting for an explanation. When he gave none, I began to walk past him but felt his hand grab my arm suddenly. "Billy, what the hell?" I asked, feeling a pair of lips on mine directly after the sentence escaped my mouth. I wish I could say I saw that coming, but I had to admit that he had shocked me. He kissed me more and more passionately, pressing me up against the wall in the hallway, and I reciprocated the kiss entirely. He held the back of my neck and I tugged at his hair, completely forgetting where we were for a moment. Once we broke away from each other, we were both breathing quite heavily. "W-what was that?" I asked, stuttering in the slightest. Billy, also out of breath, rubbed the back of his neck, "Sorry, I just had to do that." He looked down and rubbed his hands together while I thought of a response. 

I shook my head, "No, it's okay actually." His head shot up and he wore a large grin on his face, "What?" I smiled and shook my head at the goofy smile he wore on his face. "I liked it," I admitted to him. "But that doesn't mean it can happen again," I said. Billy's smile turned into a frown immediately when I said that, and I knew something bad was coming. "Why not? Jesus Christ, why the fuck not?" He asked in a somewhat aggressive matter. "I just- I don't know. We obviously can't ever actually date," I said, scoffing a little. Billy Hargrove was a notorious player, everyone knew that. He kissed me because he liked how I looked and was driven by the fact that I didn't chase him like most other girls. That didn't mean he was in love with me, and that certainly didn't mean I would fall at his feet. He was still a prick. Sure, I was attracted to him physically, but he was still a douchebag to me a lot of the time. He got very aggressive with people close to me and even treated me like property sometimes. 

"Well?" He asked, crossing his arms and tapping his foot fervidly on the ground. "You want to date?" I asked, not believing for a second what I was hearing. "Did I say that?" Billy retorted, and I rolled my eyes. "That's what I'm saying. I don't want to be played with Billy, and you're a player. It's just better this way," I said, pushing past him and walking out the front door. He ran after me, turning me around and looking into my eyes, his chest heaving up and down. "Where are you going?" He asked angrily, and I shook my head, "Home." He smirked, still a hint of anger on his face, and pinched the bridge of his nose, "No, you don't get to just walk away from this. Do you have a thing with Oliver?" I scoffed at his accusation but kept more on the quiet side. I didn't want him knowing more than I was willing to offer. Oliver was attractive, a good guy, and was actually consistently nice to me. Billy was only one of those things. 

"Maybe I do, so what?" I said. Billy tensed, but simply smirked at me afterward. "I'm happy for the two of you," He hissed before spinning his heel and going inside, slamming the door behind him. I shrugged off the encounter, it was the only thing I could do; and began to walk home. I walked for about ten minutes until I reached the center of town. I stopped at the diner to get a milkshake and just to sit down a little bit. Once I got there, I sat in a booth by myself and ordered a strawberry milkshake. Soon, the waiter brought it to me and I began to sip on it, gazing out the window as I drank. My eyes landed on a familiar face, one from not too long ago, and I noticed that they had seen me too. Sam McAllister, my old best friend began to walk into the diner, coming up to me with a big smile on his face. "Jamie?" He asked, beaming, and I got up to hug him. Sam had moved away four months ago, and I thought I'd never see him again, but here he was again in Hawkins, standing right in front of me. "Holy shit, how are you, Sammy?" I asked in utter disbelief. 

He smiled, revealing his perfect teeth and I smiled too, "I'm doing well! My folks and I just moved back here, crazy isn't it?" I nodded and gave him another hug. "I missed you!" I exclaimed and he sat down with me in the booth. "Decker and Libby are going to flip," I said, and Sam smiled again. "Oh god, how are they? Still nuts?" He asked jokingly, and I laughed. "Yeah, maybe now they'll be stable," I said. I sipped the milkshake again and offered him some, going through the old motions. It felt normal. Completely normal. Just like before. "How are things?" He asked the seemingly basic question, but I saw what he was really asking. "Good. I really did miss you," I reiterated. Sam knew things about me that neither Libby or Decker knew. He knew about something I had kept from my parents and tried my best to keep from Steve. I used to have major depression. I don't think of it as something hugely serious now, but it was a real threat when it got bad. Sam would help me through bad patches, and he always knew how to bolster my spirits when I got really sad. I cut myself too, hiding the marks with long sleeve shirts, but not enough for it to scar. Sam had reentered my life at a time of chaos, and it was an understatement to say I was surprised. Neither of us even knew when Sam was coming back. Now that he was back though, I was overjoyed. 

I just had one question bouncing around in the back of my head now that Sam had returned. What the hell would Billy think of all this?