Why are you here?

Please Just Leave Me Alone

AN: warning, this chapter contains self harm and descriptions of anxiety/panic attacks

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Radley scratched anxiously at his arm as he paced back and forth in his bedroom, probably wearing down the carpet in the process. He was just trying to take in what had happened.

He had a person, no a girl, a girl he secretly admired and really, really cared about, staying in his house. He couldn't take a roommate, not now, not someone who looked up to him so highly. "This is a dream." He murmured. "A bad dream, I-I'll wake up and it'll- I'll be back to being alone and-" he inhaled sharply, his breaths becoming shaky and panicked. Oh god, please don't do this now. Not when she was just in his living room. He pressed himself against the wall, trying to calm down. God, how the hell did he stay so calm during breakfast?! Why couldn't he do that now?!

He couldn't just toss her out, the caverns were far too dangerous. Could he just leave her somewhere? Like Neapolitown? The scoopians liked humans, maybe the hotel there would- no, that'd cost money. Money she didn't have, and hell knows he doesn't have the money to pay for it either.

He was yanked from his thoughts by a stinging sensation in his arm. He glanced down, realising why. He'd scratched the skin off his arm, pink blood trailing down the limb and dripping from the fingers that had been scratching. He cursed internally. Great, now he had a massive gaping wound that he needed to patch up.

Except his first aid kit was in the bathroom. And he'd have to walk through the living room to get there. Which meant walking past Radlynn.

Radley suddenly felt like he was going to pass out from the anxiety.

"Should've kept bandages in here, god I'm-" he muttered and sighed as he started pacing again. Maybe he could cover it with a jacket or something? Yes! Perfect! If he was quick she wouldn't even suspect a thing!

Radlynn glanced up from the book she was idly paging through when she noticed Radley had finally left his room again. Wasn't he getting changed? Why was he still in his pyjamas? All he'd done was put on a jacket. He stared back at her, almost like he was scared, as he shuffled towards the bathroom door.

"...is there something wrong?" She finally asked.

"No-! I uh-" he stammered back. He hid his arm behind his back. Radlynn arched a brow.

"You sure? You don't really look it," Radley nodded, almost anxiously. Radlynn sat up and looked at him closer. "Radley if there's something wrong..." he stared at her. "I know it's not really my place to worry about you but-"

"I'm fine." Radley cut in sharply. "I'm fine, there's nothing wrong." She stood up. "I'm fine you don't have to," god he was just repeating himself now. "to get up." She walked over to him, but didn't look him in the face. She eyed the arm hidden behind his back.

"What're you hiding?" He backed himself against the wall.

"Nothing." She glared up at him. Or at least he assumed she was glaring, he couldn't see her eyes.

"Radley." Her voice was firm, but not angry. "Please just show me." He shook his head.

"I'm fine, I told you, just go awa-" she suddenly grabbed his arm and attempted to yank it away from him. Radley stared at her in surprise and tugged his arm away, out of her reach. Or at least he hoped out of her reach.

"What's that stain?" Radley froze.

Oh. Oh no.

"Um-" Radlynn noticed his arm shaking slightly. "I spilled s-something, is all, it's no- nothing really-" he inhaled sharply, hoping that somehow she'd leave him alone before he started panicking again.

"Radley," she stared up at him calmly. "Just let me help." Her voice was soft, gentle.

"...please just leave me alone," he murmured. "I don't wan- I don't need help." She stared at him for a long, tense moment, then stepped away.

"Alright." She moved back towards the couch. "Sorry." He just skittered across the living room and hid himself away in the bathroom, not even sparing her a second glance.