wink | frerard | ✔️

ten - new beginnings

As soon as I walked into the coffee shop, I saw him. I could recognise the messy flop of dark hair from anywhere. And he could have sat anywhere in the shop, but he still sat in the booth he broke up with me in. I ordered and then walked over. 

"Hey," I said softly, and Gerard looked up from something he was drawing. I didn't even get a glance. 

"Hey," he echoed me, and I slid into the booth across from him. "So how's your life been?"

"Alright, actually. It's been going well."

"That's good," he said, stuffing the notebook in his bag. 

"How about you?" I tried. 

"Confusing as all hell," he said, turning a little red and tucking a piece of his hair behind his ear. "But tell me what's been going on for the past seven-ish months."

"Well, Jamia moved in with Lindsey and since I couldn't pay rent on a whole house without her, I moved to a flat closer to the city where my band plays a lot and where the bookstore is. I only have to walk a few blocks to work now, it's really nice. And I met Ray like... the day that we... uh... you know, and then a few months later we started dating."

I knew what Gerard was thinking. He was thinking that I moved on quickly because he took a sip of his coffee to divert my eyes from his pained smile. He was hurting. He thought I'd moved on. 

He was sorely mistaken. And sitting here, I knew that. But I also knew that I fucking loved Ray. I was in love with that man, and he made me so happy, and I wasn't going to scrap that for a relationship that wouldn't even be a relationship in the first place. 

I sighed. "So, how's your life been going?"

Gerard shrugged. "I had this one girlfriend, around the time you and Ray started dating, but she told me that I was gay and needed to go and see a boy instead of her. The next girl said that I wasn't happy and she wanted to see me happy. She was really sweet. She figured out about you all by herself."

"Damn."

"Yeah. You were right. I'm not straight, Frankie, and if you weren't in a loving relationship right now I'd ask you out again, but since I'm not trying to be the arse here, I'm going to ask you if we can just be friends... I need you in my life--just one way or another, but I know that you need me too."

I shook my head. "Excuse me?"

He looked at me like a deer caught in headlights. "That came out wrong, I--"

"Save it. It was great catching up with you, Gerard," I snapped, standing up. 

"Y-you too, Frankie," he muttered, and again, as I left, I didn't look back. 

As soon as I opened the door to my flat and walked into the kitchen where Ray was, he knew something was wrong. 

"Babe?" He looked a little bit concerned as I started the coffee machine. "Didn't you just have coffee?"

"Didn't really get to drink much of it. He said it wrong. He said he wants me back but since I have you--" my breath hitched "--he wants to be friends. You can't just say that and expect me to be friends again!"

I felt Ray gently slip an arm around my waist and I leant into him gratefully. "It's okay, Frankie. As much as I'd like to see you guys happy as friends again, if that doesn't happen, that's okay too. He might not be the same Gerard that he was when you guys were dating."

I nodded. "You're right." I sighed, then smiled again. "You're always right. I love you, Ray. Thank you."

He smiled down at me and brought me into a quick kiss. "I love you too, Frankie. And you're welcome I guess. And hey, maybe we shouldn't fuel our coffee addiction, okay, babe?"