Romangst || A Sanders Sides One-Shot Compilation

Kintsugi

OKAY so I know I don't usually post two days in a row - but I finished this today and fell IN LOVE with it so you get it very soon after my last update haha. From the request of Personwholovesfruit (it tagged you!?) I give you this - a pretty short, pretty angsty, pretty fluffy, Logince Shot. This fic is a lot fluffier than most of the angst shots I write, so keep that in mind (there is a lot of angst, tho, I promise) I just thought y'all might like something that ended a little happier lol 

WARNINGS: Angst, secrets, blood, injuries, implied self-harm, suicidal thoughts, hopeless thinking, infinitesimal food mention.

Also, Logince!

HERE WE GOOOO

Kintsugi - a Japanese art form in which breaks and repairs are treated as part of the object's history. Broken ceramics are carefully mended by artisans with a lacquer resin mixed with powdered gold, silver or platinum. The repairs are visible — yet somehow beautiful.

Logan hadn't realized how secretive Roman really was until they got together. It was casual, at first. That was fine, as Logan was not very fond of expressing feelings. Roman expressed enough feelings for the both of them, though as they grew closer Logan found that the feelings he expressed were not always the ones he was feeling. Roman was generally confident, loud about anything he did well. It was infuriating, but endearing.

"Roman," Logan asked one night as they lay in bed beside each other. Roman hummed, rolling over to look at him. "Why have you not fixed your mirror?"

He knew it was a strange question, but it had been bothering him for some time now. The large, full-length mirror on Roman's wall was cracked in places, some bigger than others, with one quite large crack in the center. With Roman being in control of everything in the mind palace - as he was creativity, it made no sense to leave it broken.

Roman didn't answer right away, he just looked from Logan to the mirror, sitting up. Logan followed suit, worry growing.

"Roman?"

"I can't." Roman finally confessed, a tired smile crossing his face. Logan had gotten better at recognizing Roman's state of mind, the past few months. He was upset, while moments earlier he'd been content and happy. But that made no sense. Why would Roman be unable to fix his own mirror?

"Why?" Logan raised an eyebrow. "You are creativity, aren't you? This room... it is purely you. Why can't you fix it - or is this a metaphorical inability?"

"The mirror..." Roman stared with a sad smile over at the mirror in question. "The mirror isn't something I created. I can't change it."

"Why is it here, then?" Logan asked irritably. "Who created it in your room?"

"I don't know." Roman sighed, looking at him worriedly. "I'm sorry, Logan. I know that must drive you crazy."

"It..." Logan adjusted his glasses, shaking his head. "It's alright, Roman. You can't just know everything, even if you want to." It would bug him, yes. But that was alright. "Do you know anything about it?"

Roman paused again, the way Logan knew meant he was choosing his words carefully - so unlike the person he pretended to be around the others. It warmed Logan's heart knowing that Roman was more genuine with him.

"The cracks change." he finally stated, speaking slowly and softly. "They change depending on... how I feel."

"What?" Logan frowned. "I thought you couldn't change it."

"I can't change it on purpose." Roman sighed, looking away. "But, whenever I feel insecure, or upset, or stressed, there are more cracks. Each crack represents something, I think. Not sure what represents what, but after a stressful audition, some go away. And if we take a break after a long creative push, some go away."