Harry Styles Imagines

weight of the world

or the one where Harry's having a hard time dealing with the aftermath of a scary moment involving his perfect little family.

It wasn't loud crying that woke her up. Y/N had always been a light sleeper, but ever since they brought the baby home from the hospital a little over a week ago, that trade became sort of a superpower: no matter how tired she was, the woman would always blink her eyes open seconds before little Ella started fussing and whining.

Not that night, tho. She waited for it: just laid there, trying to remember what day it was until her little love needed her, but minutes went by and the house remained silent, so Y/N closed her eyes again, rolling over to snuggle into her exhausted husband....who wasn't in bed.

Lifting her body off the soft mattress slowly, the woman got to the door of their bedroom before she heard his voice, a soft tune coming from the nursery down the hall. Allowing her feet to follow the sound was easy enough, even in her tired state, and Y/N had a smile spread on her lips when she found the duo.

Harry was shirtless, cradling the baby on his arms as his body moved from side to side, humming an old song under his breath as he looked down at her.

"There you are, dimples" her voice gave her away after some time, Y/N brushing her messy hair out of the way as she joined them, leaning down to kiss the baby's head

"Did we wake yeh, love?" he asked, turning around to peck her lips "was trying not to, weren't we, little one?"

"You weren't in bed. She wasn't crying. I did the math"

"Got up to get some water and I figured I could check on her" he tried to make it sound light, but she had been around long enough to spot a lie from a mile away.

"Harry...she's fine" the small woman breathed out, coming closer to rub at his tense back. Things had been a little hectic, so they had yet to address the complications on Ella's birth..or how scared it seemed to have made him "we're home now, nothing's gonna happen, ok?"

"I know, Y/N" and yet his arms were shaking a bit when he wrapped them around his wife, the baby resting comfortably on her crib, his face nuzzling her hair. "She was about to cry out when I came in, 's all. Wanted yeh to get some rest"

"You need it too, H." after years of being together and the last eight and a half months, Y/N truly didn't think it was possible to Harry to be more overprotective about her. Looking at him now, she proved herself wrong.

"I'm fine, love"

"That's bullshit, Harry. You think I don't know you haven't been sleeping?" raising her hand, she let her fingers trace the bags forming under his eyes, then linger on his skin as the man relaxed a bit as the warmth from her touch slipped into his system

"We have a newborn baby, love. Sleep is a luxury we lost" his eyes blink closed, his arms tightening around her

"H...I'm here. You know that, right? You know you can talk to me?" it was way too late to have that talk, but the fact that their little girl was asleep just a couple of feet away could help. It would remind him the storm was over, at least.

"I'm just.... 'm afraid of closing my eyes, Y/N" she could hear the tears on his voice, but she didn't move. He had to let it out, all of it "I'm terrified of looking away from you both and ending up back there. Looking at you while they try to get you back"

"Harry..."

"You were gone. baby. I saw it. Felt it, too. After they got her out....after you heard her crying. You were gone...." oh shit, now he was full-on sobbing, his body leaning on hers as he tried to get her closer and closer to him, almost as if he thought she was about to vanish into the air if he didn't hold her the right way

"No, Har. No. I'm here, ok? Look at me. Harry, come on, look at me" stepping back, Y/N laced their fingers together before resting his hand over her chest, not even caring if he felt her heart racing, keeping their eyes locked into each other. "You feel that? I'm here, darlin'. It's gonna take more than a little blood pressure drop to get me away from you, yeah? It's ok, baby"

"Promise?" the rational part of his brain knew it was an empty plea, but he needed her to say the words. Now that she knew what he was fighting, he needed Y/N to reassure him. She was the only one who could. it would take time before the terror wore off, but fighting his ghosts was always a bit easier if he had her with him. They had time, Harry told himself, standing there, Ella peacefully asleep. They had their whole lives waiting to happen,

"I do" she whispered, getting on her tiptoes to kiss him on the mouth, using her hands to wipe off his tears "of course I do, H"

"Good. Because I need you. I have never not needed you" then he let her lead the way back to bed, where he played with her wedding ring until sleep took over. One hour later, when it was time to feed Ella, Y/N slipped out, giggling at the way he whined in his sleep, fingers curling on the spot she was in just seconds ago.

Gosh, she loved her babies more than life.

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