sticky sweet {nikki sixx}

•eleven•

sitting in our regular red booth, there were many more girls crowing round our table. looking around them all, none of them even noticed me as they sat and flirted with the guys. sitting and fiddling with the buckle on my jacket, I watch as they all snort and consume their drugs and swallow their alcohol. i knew i had a right to be reluctant about coming tonight. vince looks at me with concern,
      "i'll call you a cab if you want?" he leans over to me, shaking my head,
      "no... it's okay, i'm here to celebrate you." i smile weakly raising my glass of lemonade.
nikki hadn't paid me any attention since this afternoon, it hurt. standing up and walking to the toilets, i look in the mirror and sign at myself. running my hands through my hair, it was knotty and unbrushed, nikki walks in,
"you shouldn't be in here sixx..." my hands rest on the counter of the sink, not looking at him.
"i know i shouldn't. but you look so fucking hot tonight." he strolls over, i see him lick his lips in the mirror, his hips slamming into me.
the smell of whiskey, took over my sense and his pupils consumed all his irises. stepping out of his grasp he looks at me confused,
     "i'm going to go home." i says quietly,
     "what? angel, stay, you're having so much fucking fun." nikki slurs, stumbling slightly, "we can have even more fun, right here... if you know what i mean."
shaking my head, i leave him alone in the toilet and go to vince,
     "can i have that can please?" i say to him,
     "yea, of course doll... let me walk you outside." vinnie was the only one who was the least sober for once.
we walk out to the cold and i tightly wrap my jacket around my body, lighting a cigarette i lean against the wall as vince uses a pay phone.
the sky was full on little white stars, glinting in the sky. the brightest star shines right the moon,
     "hey diane." i think to myself,
     "i saw nikki follow you into the toilets." letting out a little mhm, vince turns to look at me, "i know you've got feelings for him... it's fucking obvious."
my heart races, i had never thought of it in that way. looking at him i laugh and shake my head,
    "do i fuck." laughing i watch the ash fall from the fag, he elbows me slightly,
     "don't bullshit, we all notice it." he pauses, "nikki was beside himself when you were in rehab."
looking at vince i laugh again, "clearly not... he probably slept with loads of women."
     "no... he took four home and stopped anything before it went too far." he the swigs from his bottle, "nikki has more to him than you think."

pulling up to the apartment, i walk through the window of the house because the police had kicked the door down too many times. sliding it shut after me, i sit down on the sofa, kicking my boots off, i look around the dark and dingy apartment. mirrors had be smashed, furniture ruined— more than it was already, we had one plate left in the cupboard and four mugs. puffing on another fag, i blow some smoke rings to try and pass the time. i knew nikki wouldn't be back until early the next day, so i was bracing myself for a lonely night.
dusting my record player off, i run into nikki's room and borrow one of his. turning it on fill blast, i danced around until i was bored and tired. i tried to clean as much as i could, but we didn't have sufficient cleaning products.
suddenly, a gentle knock came from the window, walking over i pull the window up and see a man staring at me,
"this is where nikki sixx lives right?"
frowning at him, i look him up and down,
"what's it to you?"
"i'm tom zutaut..." he then goes on, frowning again, i cross my arms, "elektra records?"
"ohhhh... you're that guy." i say surprised, "you won't find any of them here, they're at the rainbow." tom nods,
"i know, but i'm not here to talk to them." he hands me a buisness card, "i want to employ you."
a burst of laughter erupts from me,
"funny... i know they've been feeling guilty for me for a few months, but i don't want a job."
"here's some paperwork about the job. my numbers on the card, call me."
laying on my bed, i throw the paperwork on the floor and put toms card on my draws.
did i really want the job? grabbing the the paperwork, i start to read through it, content commissioner... i would be touring with the guys, getting content for their music videos and live sessions. looking at the pay, my eyes pop out of my head,
     "fifteen grand a month?"
this was more than i had ever been paid in a year, i think i do want the job.