Shadow

Bay Window

The night after Peter took John, Wendy sat by her bay window, hoping Peter would come. She knew it was probably too soon, and he may have lied and might never come, but she still had hope. Sometimes, all someone needs is just a little hope to get them through something hard, which apparently John ran out of before Peter came.

Wendy propped some pillows behind her back to get comfortable and sat on the cushion on the bay window. She put a soft blanket over herself since it was cold, and kept the window shut but unlocked so she could just push it open if Peter came. It was ten at night on a Friday, so Wendy had a lamp on in her room to read for a little to help the time go by.

Wendy was halfway through her book by the time she realized it was midnight. She sighed, shut the book, and got up to put it on her nightstand. As Wendy turned to shut off the lamp, she noticed someone was sitting at the bay window, and the window was open.

"Hello love," Peter said.

"I was beginning to think you weren't going to come," Wendy said with a sigh of relief.

"I told you I would come by and date you both on each other, and I intend to keep that promise."

"Good, I'm worried about him. Did you know my papa didn't even know he was gone?"

"That's awful," Peter said, with disgust on his face.

"I know. He's honestly not a terrible man, he's good to me and Michael, but he was just so awful to John. Please don't tell him my papa or mum hadn't noticed. I feel like it would break him."

"Don't worry, I won't. It's very rare that I update the lost boys on their lives. Normally they have absolutely nothing, but John has you and Michael, so I'll only update him on the good things."

"Thank you," Wendy said, tears in her eyes.

Peter stood up and said, "it's no big deal, really."

"No, I mean, thank you for saving him, and being enough, which I guess I wasn't."

"Hey, hey don't say that," Peter said, putting his hand on her shoulder. "You were enough."

"Then why was he going to kill himself?" Wendy said, looking Peter in the eyes. He had beautiful deep green eyes, like a forests leaves.

"You can't find happiness in the same place you lost it. It's the environment he was in, not you or your brother. Just know, you were enough for him, but this place was too toxic and was killing him."

"But I should have spoken to my father, maybe that would've—"

"That wouldn't have changed anything. I've seen thousands of lost boys and their environments, and most talk about
what happened. Nothing would've changed your father, believe me." Peter moved his hand from her shoulder to her cheek, wiping away her tears.

"Thank you, I really needed to hear that," Wendy said.

"Hey, anytime. My job is to make people happy and at peace, whether they're on the island or not."

"Would you mind if one night, you take me to the island to visit him? Just to visit?" Wendys voice was filled with hope, which just made it that much harder for Peter to turn her down. But he had to.

He removed his hand from her cheek and said, "I really wish I could, but I don't know how the island would react to a girl who still has her shadow."

"I understand," Wendy said, filled with disappointment. In the back of her mind she had a plan to one day convince Peter to take her.

"Well, I guess I should go now, and tell your brother that you're okay so far without him." As Peter began to walk towards the window, Wendy grabbed his shoulder and turned him around.

"Please stay, just a little longer. It's pretty lonely here without John, and Michael is too young to really talk to."

"Yeah, of course I'll stay," Peter said, sitting where Wendy was before he came in. Wendy sat across from him, placing a pillow behind her and pulling her legs in.

"So tell me," she says, "What's it like on the island?"

"Well, Neverland is filled with boys of the ages five to seventeen. They all get along for the most part, but they are boys so they obviously have their fare share of fights. One of the boys who have been there the longest is my second in command, Scott. We run Neverland together."

"How long has Scott been there for?"

"I believe ten years."

"Wow, doe it normally take that long?"

"No, normally five, sometimes more, sometimes less. It just depends on the person."

"Do you think Scott will ever find his shadow?"

"Yeah, I believe he eventually will, after all, no one can remain lost forever. I just dont think it'll happen anytime soon." Peter said.

"Why not?" Wendy asked curiously.

"Because...because he went through something really hard, and it still haunts him. He's having an incredibly difficult time not letting the damage control his life."

"Why do you think that is?" Wendy asked.

"I think he's afraid to heal. Some people's lives revolve around trauma and oddly enough, it becomes a sort of comfort to them. Like, the pain they feel is what they are used to and can always count on, if you take that away from him, he won't know who he is and he's scared of feeling lost again. He needs to realize that even though it happened to him, it does not have to define who he is. I think once he understands that, he'll find his shadow."

"We'll have you told Scott that?"

"Of course I have. But there's a difference between knowing and understanding. I think he will find himself one day, but that won't be anytime soon at the rate he's going at."

"That's terrible. What happened to him?" Wendy asked.

"It's not my story to tell. No one except me knows what happened, and that's only because I witnessed it."

"Does everyone on the island know why everyone is there?"

"For the most part. Sometimes they'll leave out a detail out of shame, or just wanting to keep that part for themselves, without receiving pity."

"I guess that makes sense," Wendy said, "but I feel so bad for him that he doesn't want to escape his own pain."

"Me too, but it's a choice he made, whether he's aware of it or not." Peter said.

"How long have you been lost for?" Wendy asked.

"Oh, I'm not lost. Helping these boys is what makes me not lost."

"Then how come you don't have a shadow?"

"I do have a shadow, but I can never catch it because that means I have to grow up and the island will be gone, and lost boys around the world will have no hope. My shadow leads me to the lost boys, but leaves before I would be able to catch it."

"Have you ever tried to catch it?" Wendy asked.

"No, I don't want to grow up and my purpose is on the island." Peter explained. "Speaking of which, I should go back now." Peter stood up and so did Wendy.

"Please come back soon," Wendy said.

Peter smiled, and began to head out the window. "Of course," he told her.